[maddy222]

I haven't been to the hospital for about 2 years. I haven't even left home for 3 months.

I mustered up the courage yesterday to seek help for my suicidal thoughts and increased hopelessness.


So I talk to this guy who works in psychiatry and he basically says I need to distract myself. I told him I don't want to live a life of distraction and he says "But that's what you're doing here, distracting yourself" and i'm thinking WTF? I told him I came here to get help and he said "And I will try my best to help." So he blabbed on for about half an hour about his struggles and triumphs. He told me I need to get some friends and go to school. He tells me how bad medication is and that it's good that i'm not taking any. Then he left.

So then the doctor comes in. He's a bit more professional, but didn't seem to care at all. He asks why i'm there. I tell him i'm completely hopeless and suicidal. He goes "mhmmm from the looks of your chart, it looks like you've struggled with this a lot" and I say "Yeah, but not for a while"


The doctor tells me that staying in the hospital is not in my best interest and that there is no point. He did NO risk assessment and never asked if I had a suicide plan or intent. He told me to follow up with a psychiatrist(Without even providing any path on how to get one) and sent me on my way.


I'm at my wits. If this is how i'm going to be treated at the hospital, where do I go for inpatient help? I can't go to psych facilities directly, they are by referral only where I live.


Apparently, they are still using the SAME care plan from 2 years ago and they still have the same bull diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder.

I have to point out that this is the only hospital in our city and there's no point in going to another one since its all the same health authorities.

[Fizzyo]

[unaluna]

Can you make an appointment and get a referral from your primary care physician or gyn?

Maybe somebody from canada can advise

Have you tried any of these BC services:
https://www.cmha.bc.ca/get-informed/crisis-information
| Crisis Centre
Suicide prevention resources | Thrive at UBC
Suicidal Thoughts or Threats - HealthLinkBC

Sorry I cannot offer something more helpful.

[WhatDayIsItAgain]

Your courage to reach out and connect to Onward's links above will direct you to a re-evaluation or intake appointment.

Advocate by telephone for yourself to get to a therapist or case manager...

you already did great leaving your house seeking support (and they should have provided better support and a contact for follow up appointment, I think). Maybe when they said the meds would not help they were right... antidepressants do not help everyone and some other health conditions/meds cannot mix with them. Seeking help like you are comes right before finding out *we are our own best self care med*

Stopping or slowing the distress/pain/symptoms will fix this depression problem and being resourceful like you are doing is great too.

befrienders.org is another link and they have email supports
suicide.org Kevin Caruso has excellent links facts support and HOPE and a 24hr crisis line for anyone who needs to talk right now privately and compassionately

[elevatedsoul]

maddy, i am so so so sorry they didnt offer more help...
but dont give up, you deserve to feel better and treatment is part of getting there...

i dont know much about how the system works anywhere to be honest - not even where i live... just seems doctors can make their own rules sometimes...

just dont give up, be strong... keep looking for the help ...
therapy is a great thing if you have a good therapist... i prefer it over medications because i simply dont like taking a bunch of that stuff... but i do love the few pills that can help in emergencies...

continue talking here while you are going through this process...
stay focused on gett hlp so you can feel better - you deserve to feel better and have a happy life

i live in the usa so i cant really say much about what to do there... i know you said it wouldnt matter going to another facility... but what do you mean they are all the same authorities?
maybe if you try a new place you will get a really really compassionate doctor that really will go out of his way to get you good help...

please stay strong, we can help each other through these things a little... if just a little... we can try you know..
we're here for you

[dexter]

Please keep trying until you find someone who will listen and can offer the help you are seeking.

When I was suicidal I tried calling a hotline. The person on the phone was unsympathetic and said critical, judgemental things about what I was saying.

It was my first ever call to a hotline. I hung up in disbelief. But I decided that the act of calling indicated that there was a part of me that did not want to go through with it, so I called the number again. This time I got a helpful person who guided me to get to a hospital, and stayed with me on the line while I arranged for a friend to pick me up and take me there.

Help is out there but there are also paths that unfortunately lead the wrong way. Keep trying.

[Fuzzybear]

[dexter]

I should add... That call was about 13 years ago. Due to that second call, I am still here today.