Feel like I'm lying to everyone...

My depression has been on and off since 2013. This recent bout has been caused by a few factors, most notably my weight. I was fired from an apprenticeship a few weeks ago - I was fired not too long after the director there had made a comment about my weight, which I find suspicious. I was already self-conscious about how big I am but knowing that other people - especially my boss - were drawing attention to it made me feel so inadequate.
Maybe it's my anxiety flaring up again, since that and depression have always come together with me, but I feel like the reason I was fired was more my weight than incompetence - an apprentice who has only been working a week obviously still has a lot to learn, right?
Once it'd sunk in that I'd been fired, I noticed my mood slipping but attributed it to being a normal reaction to losing my job. It's only been in the past week or so that my symptoms have gotten worse - old thought processes have come back and my motivation to do anything is pretty much nonexistent. I've told my mother that I think my depression is back but the way she reacted (apathetic) led me to believe that she thinks I'm lying so that I can claim benefits.
I spoke to my other half about how it feels like I'm putting it on, but he told me that he's noticed a change in my attitude and he can tell that something is wrong because I've been worried about the doctor possibly laughing at me and telling me there's nothing wrong.
Is it possible that it's all just in my head and there's nothing wrong, or am I letting my anxiety get the best of me?

First, you spoke how I feel about my weight. I am obese and I feel like everyone looks at me for my weight and not my personality. I too have fears that people are going to judge me for wanting to get disability. I do have more than depression but I feel like people think less of me because I am going for disability. I feel, too, that my doctors laugh at me or will laugh at me when I confide in them. All in all, I can't offer help but I can offer a friend that understands you.

I don't know which I find scarier - the prospect of the doctor laughing at me, or him telling me that there really is nothing wrong and I'm lying.

It is very hard to get taken seriously by doctors because they don't trust us because of those who really do abuse the system . it took me from my teens till I was 32 to get diagnosed despite going to the doctors many times. I got laughed at by one doctor. But it turns out I do have a mental illness.
I have a weight problem too ( my profile PIC is not recent ) I put lots of weight on due to a medication I was taking and now I can't loose it. It really gets me down too. You have another friend here . pm me any time ((((( hugs ))))

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Thank you, I'll bear that in mind. It feels to me like I AM abusing the system, by using my genuine condition to take advantage of disability benefits even though I know that I'm entitled to do so. It's like I know that I'm unfit for work, but I feel pressured by some invisible force to ignore that fact and soldier on regardless. There are others out there that work and have it worse than me, right?

Unfortunately some people who are not well do have to work , that doesn't mean you should. Some countries make it more difficult to claim benefits if you are sick. Where are you from ?

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The UK. England, to be exact.
I contacted our benefit agency on the 1st April to start a claim for benefits and declared myself fit for work (as I believed myself to be at the time). But then my symptoms started coming back and I rang them again on Friday to declare myself unfit for work. The woman on the phone was very unsympathetic and even accused me of knowingly providing incorrect information. I had to explain what I'd been going through before she conceded, but she still didn't sound too convinced.

I'm in England too. They treat us very badly here when we try to seek help. I think its because so many people abuse the system. Its not fair on genuine people like us. They will make you feel like you are lying . I think its their job to be like that . but its really unpleasant for us . I'll pray they don't treat you like that in future .

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They're vile. I've been put onto Universal Credit and most of the people on the phone are so useless. I don't know if they're poorly trained, have a chip on their shoulder or both. Either way, it's definitely not beneficial to me when they have a bad attitude and accusatory tone.
I just need to get my head sorted by September, if not completely then at least to a manageable state. I want to go to uni but being ill won't exactly make things any easier. And working until then isn't going to give me much of a chance to recover when it'll just introduce new stresses. The last thing I need is to be hounded by the Jobcentre to look for work when I'm already trying to pick up the pieces of my mental health.

Your not lying and I know exactly how you feel, I am applying for disability and most days feel like I'm a sham..but know I am not.

And your weight has affected your work...leading to mental illness.

Make sure when you are in therapy you talk about all the ways this depression is limiting your functioning. Obesity will also play a role in determination if you are eligible for disability.

But, just don't focus on obesity..seems like it has been years of struggles with you..if you have any previous psychiatric notes...from previous docs..get copies of them for your newer doctors.

I can't even tell you to relax and everything will be ok because I have been in the disability process for almost 2 years and it is a constant battle to get them information they request. They like "specialists"...so see as many specialists as you can.

The first and only time I tried going to see a specialist was the Crisis Team at the nearest psychiatric hospital - never again. The doctor who greeted me in the waiting room was expecting to see my dad (who is on DLA for Borderline Personality Disorder) and wasn't best pleased to find out that he'd rushed over from the other side of the hospital to see me. Begrudgingly, he took me into a room to talk about what was going on and I explained everything, as well as my concerns that I could have been suffering from something more than depression (such as BPD). I've never known anyone to be so condescending to their patients. His exact words were "You're just a normal 19 year-old lad going through the pain of growing up". I was gobsmacked. I understand now that I don't have anything serious like BPD, but at the time I was a mess and felt really let down by the one service that was supposed to help.

I have BPD . my biggest symtom of it is depression

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While I don't think I have BPD, I feel like there's a possibility of having something more than depression. It recurs more often than I think is normal.

I was "diagnosed" but also dismissed by one doctor. Some of them completely suck

They don't trust us partly bc some of them are full of **** and can't tell the difference between someone who is genuinely distressed...,
Grrrrrrrrrr

(Just my opinion)

Went to see my regular doctor today - wasn't given any medication, so I guess that's a good sign of nothing too serious. He did give me a fit note for work, citing "Mood disorder" and "Obesity" as the primary conditions leading to my being unfit for work.
He asked me how long I wanted the fit note for. He asked me the same question last year when my depression was playing up, and back then I didn't know how to translate my condition into an accurate amount of time I should expect to be unfit for work for. Well, the same can be said for today.
I threw out a random span of time (four months) and he was gobsmacked - how are you supposed to actually work out how long you're going to be ill for? It's going to take a lot more than a month for me to lose enough weight to be confident beyond the limits of my house.
He told me they can't justify a fit note for longer a month just for obesity. I left the surgery feeling so ashamed of myself.