[Bishtaw]

So here I am, I'm from Michigan and currently in Denver Colorado. For the past 6 months I've been planning to hike the Colorado trail which is a 486 mile trail. However as time went by and I gathered all the gear. I did a few day hikes some good some bad. But it didn't really give me any of the experience I need for this trip.

However all of this planning went wayside when I boarded the train and it's been going down hill since then. It's been less then 48 hours and I'm already too scared I won't be able to do this and in all likelihood I don't have a chance of finishing this hike due to my lack of preparedness. I've only done a few day hikes that weren't even at altitude. Just walking to the hotel with my gear was difficult and that was only a mile on a road. On the trail I should be doing at least 10 miles daily to resupply in towns without running out of food. However I really have no clue what 7 days with of food is besides my goal of 1.5 to 2 pounds a day. Which every hiking place suggests.

The one thing I'm at least able to pull from this trip be it a failure or a miracle is I see I have a problem with failure and shaming myself for anything I'm not good at. I really hope I may just snap out of all of this when I'm on the trail but I'm worried that all I'll have are these thoughts festering inside me for until I either finish this trip or I bail out early.

I wish I understood why I have this shaming motive for myself. I don't know but I don't think I can return knowing I have failed myself and wasted over 500 dollars in travel expenses and even more in gear. Especially since I still live with my parents and I know they will be disappointed in me as well. But this is my first real trip alone and it was probably a bad idea from the start. So maybe they will be okay with this failure if I at least mange a day or two out here.

Sent from my SM-G900P using Tapatalk

[Skeezyks]

Hello Bishtaw: Well... "live-&-learn" is the obvious thing here I guess. You're young. You've never done something like this before, you took a chance, & you've learned a bunch of things as a result. Maybe you'll try this again at some point or maybe not. But what you've learned as a result of this effort will no doubt come in handy in the future. You're just beginning to test your wings, so to speak. There's no embarrassment there, from my perspective. Please try not to beat yourself up. Everyone has to start somewhere...

[Bishtaw]

I'm worried that if I do try this what will I do in a week in and I'm sure this isn't for me how would I get off the trail and back to Denver if there is no greyhound in the next town I would have to hope for human kindness to drive me either to a place that has a greyhound out airport or back to Denver. This scares me so much as I've never experienced anyone or know anyone who knew of someone that kind.

Sent from my SM-G900P using Tapatalk

[Ceara1010]

Originally Posted by Bishtaw

I'm worried that if I do try this what will I do in a week in and I'm sure this isn't for me how would I get off the trail and back to Denver if there is no greyhound in the next town I would have to hope for human kindness to drive me either to a place that has a greyhound out airport or back to Denver. This scares me so much as I've never experienced anyone or know anyone who knew of someone that kind.

Sent from my SM-G900P using Tapatalk

I am impressed you even are giving this a try, and all alone.

But hitchhiking is a bad idea. Not safe.

Since you have access to the Internet, have you tried getting advice on one of the Colorado Trail discussion forums? People ask all kinds of questions there while they are hiking. There seem to be a lot of these forums.

--Ceara1010

[Bishtaw]

A lot of people say hitching is the way to get to towns but I'm not thrilled about this as it's another unknown. Heck today was the first time I ever even used a uber driver, still haven't used a taxi but that may happen tomorrow :/

Sent from my SM-G900P using Tapatalk

[Ceara1010]

I'm not really the rugged, outdoorsy type (wish I was) but I did try some things when I was young--particularly spelunking. I did a lot of this years ago.

One thing I learned doing this was the style of the leader of the group made a huge difference on my perspective about how I progressed. One leadership type (laid back, no ego, nothing to prove) could make me feel I could do anything, and usually I did try everything, and successfully. Another type (critical, bossy, controlling) could make me hesitant, and even frightened to try things and in the end made me feel like a wuss and a failure even no matter how I really did.

But you are alone, so you are the leader. And I think beating yourself up over your current challenges is not a leadership style that is conducive to maintaining a realistic perspective regarding your success/failure. You could actually be born to hike long-distances, but could still talk yourself out of pursuing it further because you have stumbled on this first go.

Since you've already ascertained the major problem is a lack of preparedness, I would have to agree this sounds like a live-and-learn thing. Next time, just be sure to be better prepared.

--Ceara1010

[TishaBuv]

You're not being a failure. You're being a success. You realize you are not adequately prepared and you are thinking ahead about the problems you could run into. It is much smarter to bail on this hiking trip alone than to blindly go for it and possibly get into big trouble.

Don't worry about the money. I think your parents will be proud that you didn't do something stupid.

[Bishtaw]

Idk I've always had issues with my parents and being a disappointment to them. I do think you guys are right that I shouldn't be doing this trip I wasn't really expecting the last minute thoughts to be so hard. I think I'll at least give it a day on the trail before deciding to give up on this trip. If anything I can just lie to them and say the altitude was too much for me and at least I can say I attempted it. I did learn quite a bit even if I didn't make my goals.
One thing I learned unrelated to this was how hard it is to book a hotel at 20 years old. Also I guess besides the food I can still use everything I have at a later date and the food will be eaten eventually anyways.

Sent from my SM-G900P using Tapatalk

[Bishtaw]

Well it's been a night still can't muster the courage to even try the trail now especially as my altitude sickness has kicked into full gear after sleeping. I think I'll just stay in Denver for a few days then head home as there is plenty to still do here.

Sent from my SM-G900P using Tapatalk