[MickeyCheeky]

I feel so lonely..

I can't stand it anymore...

Do you have a pet? Are you able to get one? I'm sorry you are hurting.

[MickeyCheeky]

No, I don't have pets.. I don't plan on having one. I just want some human connections, but the world has forgotten me

Thank you, though

[eskielover]

The way I met people in the totally new town I moved to was to volunteer with things I had an interest in. I got active in the horse community locally & at the horse park when a huge volunteer need came up with the world equestrian games. The deciration crew I got involved with has become a little family of close friends that annually wirks together decorating for the eventing show & we help out at other horse shows.

I always loved ballroom dance. I never imagined I would find quality ballroom dance lessons in small town america but I did & wow, great group if people to enjoy dancing & socializing with.

One never knows what rock we overturn that turns up wonderful people to interface with.....but what I found is that we have to take those steps, they win't come to us. When we arent feelung like outting oyrselves out there it does limit & create lonliness in our life.

I was dealung with PTSD & leaving a bad marriage when I moved here but was determined to break the way I had lived all my life & let my inner self out so I coukd find out who & what I really was. It was amazing to break those chains & find out that life really ciukd be wonderful even living alone in the country. I have met the mist winderful people in my life when I was finally able to open up.

Having supportive oeople in life is so important though I had no idea until I finally found it.

[MickeyCheeky]

Thank you, eskie, for sharing your story

Unfortunately I don't know how to break those chains... I'm honestly a boring person, have never developed any real interests or talent... I don't even know where to start. That's why I think I'm doomed to stay like this forever. I have to blame myself for this...

[Fuzzybear]

Is there anything about yourself you like? Your smile maybe?

It makes me sad when people consistently use such harsh language about themselves. It reminds me of the abuse I was subjected to when I was young. . Some parents “shouldn’t” have children

If you ever have children I think you’d be a good parent it’s a “cliche” but that’s one of the most important jobs in the world...

What I would do is focus more on my studies. They aren’t “boring”. Maybe in time you’ll develop a passion for something. It’s never too late. Your life has hardly begun.

If you really aren’t “good at anything” that doesn’t have to be a permanent state (whether you’re 19 or 29)

I hope you find a good friend in “real life” - (just one good friend can make all the difference). You’re likeable just as you are

[dexter]

meetup.com is supposed to be a good way to meet people with similar interests.

[Loose Screw x 2]

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

I'm honestly a boring person, have never developed any real interests or talent...

That's not true. Everybody has a talent.

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

That's why I think I'm doomed to stay like this forever. I have to blame myself for this...

NO. It doesn't have to be that way. I deal with these feelings too but, when I wake up the next morning it is a new day and no one ever knows what a new day will bring. If you can, get out and go somewhere. Find something productive to do to take your mind off of these thoughts. Go to a park and just walk around or to a library or any kind of place that you like to be were there are other people. You may meet someone that you get along with. You wont know until you try.

[Marla500]

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

Thank you, eskie, for sharing your story

Unfortunately I don't know how to break those chains... I'm honestly a boring person, have never developed any real interests or talent... I don't even know where to start. That's why I think I'm doomed to stay like this forever. I have to blame myself for this...

This is depression talking...you just need to bounce your thoughts off other people and you will find lots of things you are interested in! I like the suggestions here. If you can get out of the house and be where other people are, that might give you some energy to feel a little better. Don't put any pressure on yourself! Interact a bit without any specific expectations and things will start to fall into place. as I type this I think I am talking to myself too...lets get out there!

[Nike007]

I’m sorry hug

I feel your pain... Is there any group activities you can do? Or even if you can’t or don’t know where to start, how about just visiting a local coffee stop or a park and watch the world, you know?

I have sadly been unsuccessful with many social activities. This is for many reasons like depression, but I have not given up. I tend to not believe people when they say things about joining clubs or going to events, but I drag myself anyways.

For things to join though, it could be something you do in your pass time like knitting, drawing, colouring, collecting something, I don’t know. And you can stem it from there. You could also try volunteering at places you are interested in.

My loneliness has impacted me a lot lately too the last few days so I understand.

[colin-s]

You’re going to be fine MickeyCheeky. I was in the same place you are now for a very long time. I still hate to be alone. I eventually forced my self to step out of myself and got into activities that involved groups of people. I took up scuba diving and kept doing courses and got to the top of that tree and met fantastic people along the way. I bought a dirt bike too and met great people to ride with. Done loads of other stuff since then and still do those activities and hang with those people. Side benefits are great health and fitness that improved my outlook on life and the world. You can too! You’re young and beautiful and the world is at your feet. Just reach out and take it but it starts with one step. Take that step! I still have moments of loneliness as I’m in a relationship with a very depressed lady who lives in a shell and keeps me outside of it. Hence me being on this forum. It can really get me down so I get out of the house and do stuff that makes me happy. The fact that you feel lonely means that you feel! Feeling is important. If you can feel loneliness then you can feel joy. I used to wait for someone to come and relieve me of my loneliness. It didn’t happen. When I went out and got involved in activities it changed my life. Stay strong and believe in yourself. You’re going to be just fine.

[MickeyCheeky]

Thank you all so much for your sweet, kind replies

You've all given me very strong suggestions. I suppose joining some clubs or going to parks or other places with interests similar to mines would work... but I'm not sure what my interests even are so I'm not sure how to start even a basic conversation. I'm also not sure that's really what I'm looking for.. although that's important, I think I'm looking more for someone who could be able to support me through difficult times (and of course I would give the same support back).

I'm already trying my best to distract myself. But it often feels so meaningless, like I'm just avoiding my problems instead of facing them..

[eskielover]

We have an interesting organization here in many of the states. Its called an extension office....sn extension of the university. The 4-H is run through it. There are cooking & quilting & knitting & craft groups.....& they head up all the farm & land activities for the farmers around. It is an amazing place to get together.

The thing is that for the support yiu are looking fir, yiu need to find someone who wants to get to know you & know them.

HOWEVER.....it is hard on any relationship ehen thst is ALL it is about. I honestly find it very importsnt to have a psychogist so I don't constantly BURDEN my friends with my troubles. I talk about them on a high level with friends so they know what is going on in my life but any depth about my problems I talk it over with my T.

[MickeyCheeky]

Thank you, eskie, for your insight You're absolutely right, I don't want to be a burden... at the same time, I don't think it's a bad thing to have friends whom you can share you feelings to.. after all, relationship with friends are different than the ones with a therapist.

Idk. Maybe I just need a better therapist

I am not a brilliant conversationalist. However, many people appreciate talking to people who will just really listen to them and care. You do this all the time. I try to focus on doing things rather than living in my head all of the time (sometimes I fail at this other days I can focus on what I am doing). In my case, things like walking, cooking, cleaning, paperwork, my part time job, etc. When I can afford it, I used to enjoy group classes like yoga. When you are able to some day--adopting a pet like a dog can give you company, as well as things to talk about and do. A dog motivates you to walk them everyday. My son has always loved playing chess and many cities have chess clubs or you can play people online. There might be young people in your area that are into a certain game like Pokémon Go (I am not that up to date on what's in--I am not a gamer). He likes boxing and working out. If there is a gym in your area and you start working out (getting in shape can make you look good in your clothes--perhaps attract a girl's attention) you might find someone to work out with eventually. Sorry you are struggling with this. I know many of these suggestions may not be a good fit for you, just suggesting that you emphasize doing some sort of activity everyday.

[MickeyCheeky]

Thank you I used to go to the gym once.. didn't gain a lot out of it.. maybe I should try again..

[katydid777]

Maybe if you are not working at the moment, or on the weekends you could volunteer. Like to a nursing home, most of the elderly are lonely, and would just love someone to talk to, or a hospital kids ward, where you could help sick children play, or a child daycare, or people who are shut ins and like your self don't get to see people unless someone shows up at there door. There are so many places, everywhere that would love a little extra help from volunteers. This was just a thought. I am so sorry you are having such a difficult time.

[Purple,Violet,Blue]

Hugs, Mickey. As others have said, you're young, beautiful, intelligent and nice! I'm sure that if you just plonk yourself in the corner of a coffee shop for a few hours, you will catch the attention of plenty of men. No need to do anything. Just sit with a book. Then make eye contact with anyone you like the look of. Smile. If they come over to say, 'What are you reading?', you can chat for a few minutes. If you don't like them, look at your watch, and say, 'Sorry, I have to go'.

What's the worst that can happen? A nice coffee-shop is a friendly, comforting place.

Put a post-it-note on your mirror:

I'm young, beautiful, intelligent and nice.

They aren't your words. We said them!

[Sunflower123]

((((( Mickey )))))

[MickeyCheeky]

Thank you all for the support I'm male, btw

[Purple,Violet,Blue]

Apologies, Mickey. I shouldn't have made any assumptions!

[katydid777]

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

Thank you all for the support I'm male, btw

I am sorry, I guess the pic had me thinking you were female, but my sugestions would work ether way.

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

I feel so lonely..

I can't stand it anymore...

I'm here for you