Sunday

Sundays.

I used to crave these days when I was little. I wanted to see my friends in youth group. I wanted to learn about a higher power watching over me. I wanted to make my grandmother proud. "Life is a test to see if we're worthy of God" is what my grandma would tell me when I'd confide in her about how hard my mind was on me.

I hate these days now. There are no friends to really see anymore, no community. I have no interest in learning of a higher power that doesn't give a damn about me. I've let my grandma down. "Life isn't worth the effort" is what my mind is telling me.

This isn't meant to offend anyone's religion. I'm just explaining how I feel. How I believe that when I die, I'll simply be nothing. There's no soul to be had, there's no light leading me somewhere safe. It's just darkness. I'm craving that darkness. My grandma would be so ashamed of me if she could see me now. I've renounced religion and everything she ever taught me.

I'm so tired of waking up to Sundays.

Hugs to you . we are here for you . keep posting . i will listen .

I do question religion / god sometimes because of all of us that suffer but i try to believe there is something better for all of us waiting .

Im not sure what i believe I just want us all to be happy .

We all deserve happiness .

((((( So leigheas )))))

Interesting! I didn't grow up as a Christian, but I recall when my mother used to take my brother and I to a church for Sunday school. Back then, when I was a kid, I had Attention Deficit Disorder (it was back in the mid-1960s when it wasn't called that). So I just went and got nothing out of it. When the class ended, we got picked up. My parents just didn't want anything to do with church.

When I turned 23 years old, I became a Christian and was going to church practically every Sunday. The only times I didn't go was when I was working at my parents' resort, which was opened on Sundays and I had to work. But recently I have stopped going to church altogether.

I still have a relationship with God, but I have stopped going to church because I got sick of feeling like an outsider when I went. I have been a life-long singleton, and after being 30 years old, going to church was not that great anymore. For some strange reason, churches do not seem to encourage and welcome single people. There are all kinds of blogs about that.

For quite a few years, I was feeling depressed every Sunday morning. I guess it was because of having to go to church and getting ostracized. I was telling people that it seemed like going to church was like paying a penalty and being punished for the sins I had committed throughout the week.

I feel bad for not going to church, but now I feel a little bit better at doing what I want to do on Sundays. I feel like I have an extension on my weekends. I feel alone still, and that seems to happen all of the time.

I'm basically trapped in the same corner, so to speak. I think you could describe me as a negative atheist, though I like the thought of "keeping my options open". I've described myself as an agnostic for many years, but I'm not really sure how I feel about this: sometimes, I just think that life is a long series of trials and difficulties and then you die. No god, no afterlife, no reward, no nothing. End of the show.

When I was a kid, I used to think that me and my family were quite lucky. I thought god watched over us. Then, I grew up and started considering all the madness we've been through and, because of that and other reasons, I just gave up on religion. It just feels like a joke, a very cruel one. This is obviously my opinion, I'm not one to attack people's beliefs. I respect everybody and I firmly believe that what matters most is finding your own place in the world, with all that entails.

As for my friends, well, I can say there's a connection with regards to that as well. My friends have become self-absorbed, pompous and kinda snobbish. I have no time for that. It's incredibly hard to share something with them, even something as trivial as a TV show, a song or a picture. Most of them don't care. My closest friends live far away from me. All those people are successful and have done something with their lives, which only serves to make me sad and envious.

I know, my post won't do much for you in terms of consolation, but maybe what you can take from it is that you're not alone. I'm always here for you.

((((Everyone))))

((((Sò leigheas)))) Don't feel guilty for your feelings, my friend. That's just the way they are. I'm so sorry you're struggling so badly... you truly deserve eternal happiness for all the good things you've done on this Earth.

We differ -- the only thing keeping me from loathing Sundays is the fact that it's about God for me. I love God, therefore I love Sundays. However, I notice that on Sundays, the worries that disappeared on Friday and Saturday rear their ugly heads again.

That seems to be the way it is for me. Fridays I feel pretty good and then Saturday comes around and I feel better. Sunday comes around and I feel like "oh no, going back to work tomorrow". I like my job, but yet I still have those feelings, just like when I was going to school.

Sometimes on Fridays, there can be an issue that comes up; and it can happen by the end of the day. It becomes unfinished business; and then it ruins my whole weekend. Come Monday I have to face that unfinished business that appears to be unpleasant. Right now I am experiencing exactly that. I put it in a post about last Friday on the Daily Check-In.

I very much understand the feeling of no community. That's the way it is at where I live. Everyone else seem to do their own things and it makes me feel isolated. It seems like it's so hard to make friends. Also I have no family union. I only have my sister to call me once a week and that's it. She sometimes doesn't call at all and she calls only when it's convenient for her. It can be convenient for her, but not for me. Also she sounds tired and depressed.

It's a weird situation for me. I think I believe in God (or some kind of Higher Power), but I don't care much for organized religion. I don't like how each religion thinks they are right and all other religions are wrong. I grew up Catholic, but that's because I was born into a Catholic family. If I had been born into another religion, that's the one I would be. Would God send me to Hell for being born a Muslim? If He would, then that is not the kind of God I want to believe in.

But I started socializing with people in a nearby Catholic church. They have an active young adults group, and these people have pretty much become my entire social circle. Still, I feel like a hypocrite, because I honestly don't believe most of what they believe. And politically I am a liberal while most of them are conservative. So I feel like there are things I can't talk about with them. Still, without them I would have no social life. So I am not sure what to do.

Also, although I am pretty active with the social activities at church, I usually don't go to mass.

I can relate somewhat. I grew up in a strict Christian home. I thought I'd become an atheist for a few years, but I always go back to believing in the faith I grew up with. I've nothing to lose for giving my life to God. It's difficult to believe because it feels sometimes like "this can't be the life God intended for me". Life isn't fair or just. I hope the best for you .

johnny cash sunday morning coming down - Google Search

((((Everyone))))

It doesn't matter what God or anyone else thinks about you if you think every life matters to you.

I used to believe in God and all that stuff but if there is any religious diety (sp) then he or she or it doesn't give a flying crap about any of us. He, she or it probably disappeared off elsewhere when earth was created cause he or she or it got fed up of us humans.

Just my opinion

I look forward to Sundays though, I volunteer at a dog rescue on Sunday mornings

(((((So))))) we're all here for you though