Hey

well, hey I guess. I guess you all know why I'm here, I was a bit nervous about this cause last time I tried one of these online support groups it, well it went quite badly. I'm sorry for being the most unforthcoming and generally guarded jerk, but I'm a little scared. I dont even know what to say, I'm trying not to waste your time but I tend to play my cards close to my chest. Apologies again.

i was fearful when i first joined just me88, but because i recieved an unconditional welcome and because people here talk in such real ways, its really the only support website ive ever tried...

i hope it works for you... and Welcome!

Welcome to PC. No need to apologize. Post as you feel comfortable. I hope you find the support you are looking for. Just take your time.

BB

hell, I dont even know what to say. I hate that I feel this way, I have no reason to. There are people who have been through so much more than me who manage, I despise myself for not being strong enough to manage my own feelings. Stupid melodramatic self.

This years been kinda rough, last month being hardest of all. I'll give you a brief summary, lost 2 friends to argumentation, lost 2 to a car crash, started to seriously regret a lot of life decisions, heard from my father (with predictably disasterous consequences) and managed to prove to my remaining family that the only thing I can do consistently is perpetually disappoint. Right now I dont like where my life is going and I sure as hell dont like where I'm coming from. I'm not sure where life got so complicated....that wasnt quite as summarisitc as I wanted but it'll do

yeah, that 'll do to start wont it? when i look back, i have no idea how i juggled so many different trainwrecks in my life... i think i just never stopped to take a really good look, cause if i had, it would have overwhelmed in an instant... one of my defenses was dis-sociation.. in that mind frame, the human psyche can tolerate a lot of torture, but it comes back...

you're talking now, airing it out, establishing where you are...

i cant say i always enjoy hearing others stories, but it surprises me, when im in my lowest points, coming to PC and reading others experiences gives me a feeling of home... just to not feel alone felt like 1/2 the healing was done (which of course it wasnt) and it it felt good to be with others who could understand and cared, put themselves out on the limb in order to help... it re-established a small amount of faith in humanity for me...

if you stay awhile, i hopw you'll get some positive vibes going too.. just share, just be yourself, and if you can, relax...

i dont think many of us are really that big disappointment we imagine ourselves to be.. but we are deluded when we are ill... after some time, the light begins to shine again...

Come on guy, we're all kind of jerks here! The smartest, coolest jerks on the planet

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hell, I dont even know what to say. I hate that I feel this way, I have no reason to. There are people who have been through so much more than me who manage, I despise myself for not being strong enough to manage my own feelings. Stupid melodramatic self.

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You have no idea how many times I have said those exact same things. Well everything except the "stupid melodramatic self", that's one I've not heard before. My phrase is much less complementary, nor can it be repeated in public.

The fact is, you do feel that way. Whether you have a valid reason for feeling that way is too much for a frog of little brain.

I don't believe they give out degrees for passing judgement. If they do, I don't know of anyone who has one. That's not to say some of us can't be very opinionated from time to time.

Mostly we are here to listen. To be the release for those things you have bottled up inside and don't know what to do with them. So feel free to post as often as you like.



Thanks for stopping by and come back often.

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just_me88 said:
There are people who have been through so much more than me who manage

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That is not the point although I have said that often enough to myself and others. You are a unique individual and what one person can shrug off can break another. It is just like one mans trash is anothers treasure. You are UNIQUELY you. And we are hear to listen and prop you up when you need a little help. Welcome and I do hope to get to know ya more!! I am kinda new to forum writing and everyone here has been pretty awesome!!

Hugs and Take Care, melanie

Hey welcome to pc ((((((just_me88))))))))))

Sounds like you've had a pretty rough year!

Let me just say a few things...

A) You're not melodramatic. I've experienced melodrama, and what you've said here is NOT it.
B) Everyone's pain and experiences are different. Some people deal better with some things than others. That doesnt make you a bad person, or weak or anything like that. It just means you're better at coping with some things rather than others. We can't all be good at everything all the time.

I'm sorry about your friends. That's always rough, no matter how you lose someone you're close to - it always hurts a heckuva lot.

I'm sorry that your family is disappointed in you. Seems like one can never do enough to make everyone happy - least of all our own families. Are *you* disappointed in yourself, for what you've done (excluding letting your family down)? At the end of it, the only person you're accountable to is yourself, but family's tend to forget that important fact.

I'm glad you found us, continue to talk out whatever is on your mind. We'll listen.

Welcome to Pc !!! I hardly ever create a post so I think you
are courageous...(smile)

Yes, maybe some people have had it worse than you, so what. You are still important and if it hurts you need to vent.
One day, I started crying very hard in front of my little nephew. I told him, I was sorry that I was crying, but it just hurted so much the way his mother treated me. He put his
little arms around me and said I understand , let all your tears out. It is not good to hold them in, Can you imagine
how blessed I felt to have my 11 yr old nephew tell me this?

So, the point I am trying to make is we are all here to support each other.

God Bless.

Welcome 88. It's an odd thing to go out into a public forum and admit you're in pain. Even anonymously, it's unusual behavior in our culture. I think a person would have to be an exhibitionist to not feel a little strange about it. Congratulations on your bravery.

In my short time here I've seen an incredible variety of issues. Some of them severe, others a little less so, but in every case the person posting was greeted with maturity and respect. So whatever your issue, whatever your pain, there will be people here to listen.

I'm sorry you're hurting and I hope you get relief soon.

Be safe.

Cyran0