[Deilla]

I feel fine. I took some time out to play one of my games. It was enjoyable. I am cooking now. So today is going well.

OK (enough), but very tired.

[LittleEarthquakes]

Waiting for medication to kick in. Depressed right now.

[Mountaindewed]

I’ve mainly been depressed about the thing I’ve been depressed about for almost 6 months. I mean my grandmas death didn’t get any easier until it hit that 10 year mark. And my last hospitalization in 2015 didn’t leave my mind for a year. So there’s hope this thing will get easier. But if I continue to feed it it won’t get better.

But besides that I haven’t been totally depressed today. I’ve been limiting myself on how much news I watch. I deactivated my Facebook a few days ago and I still don’t want to activate it again. I also logged out of my Reddit page and I logged out of all my email accounts. Just for my own peace of mind. I plan on watching AGT and the new Drag Race Allstars episode tomorrow. I’ll have to get into my emails though. But not the other stuff.

Fairly busy in the morning because I had to pick up a few things. Nothing much after that. I've been depressed because I miss the things that I can't do for now. I'm feeling lost at knowing what I can do with myself other than those activities that I've done for so long that I shouldn't do for now. August has been a real trying month.

[Breaking Dawn]

I'm trying to encourage myself while feeling depressed.

[Deilla]

I'm feeling pretty depressed at the moment. I guess the best thing for me is to just go to bed.

[3rd rock]

I have survived another week. The weekend begins. I will spend my weekend futilely trying to be productive in writing. There's no point in it. I will never succeed.

[regretful]

Like last week, the soul-robbing companion depression is still by my side. I've tried to make peace with it; I've tried telling it that it's an unwelcome guest...I suppose that if there is a silver lining it would be that I'm dealing with it somewhat better than I did in the past - I wish all of you well in your fight against this invisible demon.

I'm still restricted for the things I want to do, but lately I'm feeling a little bit better emotionally. I have been pretty busy in the last couple of days which is nice considering that I've been cooped up in my place. The things that have been keeping me busy required me to be in my own place, so that's a little consolation. And they had to be done.

For now I'm planning to go on a bike ride a week from tomorrow. I think that's when I'll be able to do it. I miss it so much.

[Mountaindewed]

I am beyond depressed about everything. I really needed that email from my current therapist today that never came. Now I don’t know what to expect when we do our session on Monday. If she’s mad at me or not. I don’t know how tough the weekend is gonna be. I mean if I think it will be bad then it will. But I’m hoping to just be able to read and distract myself all weekend.

[Deilla]

I'm feeling sad and lonely. I just took my nighttime meds. So I will go to sleep soon.

[Kelly68]

I'm feeling extremely lonely. The loss of my dad is still with me. It's the finality of everything, mom then dad, and brother and sister aren't really close to me although I wish I could change that. I get angry at my situation even though there's no one to blame but myself. I just want my sons to be alright. I just want my own place but that's looking impossible. My landlord was home all week when he's usually at a job. We don't get along too well. It seems when I'm down about things he likes to rub it in my face. I know deep down he must be a good person, but he's comparing oranges to apples. He has everything he needs to be happy. If he sees what he thinks is wrong with me it's like shoving it in front of me to say it's my fault for being depressed and down. He has put my son down for things he can't begin to understand. The lonliness will get to me soon. I talk to my cat.... I'd say I'm almost there at being the so called crazy cat lady. I wish I could just have answers to things there seems to be no answers for. I wish I was good at something. I wish my "friends" were there to remember me, at least once. I only have 2 and they are distant. Life seems pointless to me too right now.

[3rd rock]

It's been a couple more weeks and my novel is a failure. I can't succeed no matter what I try.

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by hvert

Feel like I can't focus on anything useful but then don't even try and then feel guilty. It's such a bad cycle.

Sometime I feel like that myself.

[Buffy01]

I been feeling really depressed again.

As always, I cleaned my place this morning like I always have. Nothing much after the cleaning and lunch ended. I feel like the part on my face that was worked on three weeks ago is looking much better. I'll be very happy when I can have my old routine back, even though my social life won't be any better by then.

[Kelly68]

Today was better. I saw both my sons. i've made a decision to give money even though it's counted as my asset My son's both need help in life, that matters more to me than anything.

Originally Posted by 3rd rock

It's been a couple more weeks and my novel is a failure. I can't succeed no matter what I try.

Try to write something else. May be that will help!

[Kelly68]

I crave privacy. But I won'r get it. not in this housing market. I have no idea what I'm doing. I think I can go back to work full time yet I have heard nothing since this interview. I can look elsewhere but jobs are scarce and salons may be shut down again... who knows. There's no stability in the job market either. Advice sucks, invest in stocks. I know nothing about stocks except that it seems more like gambling. I miss my dad. I'd rather have him back.. I'm old but it doesn't mean losing family is any easier. I don't think he'd have advice for me anyways..... in his mind my brother would help me figure this out. My brother was a complete arse to me.. doesn't speak to anyone because he thinks the amount of money is low. It is, but it's no ones fault. It's the way things go. I hate that leaving a house and your dad dying breaks up familys that rant about the price of anything. It was my dads. He worked and mom their whole life. That's why I feel, even though I'm in pain and disabled, I should work too for my two sons . Depression takes a back burner, but I'm anxious and worried.

[Deilla]

I feel a little bit better than I did when I woke up. My grocery shopper got almost everything I wanted. So I am pleased. Now I just hope they deliver to the right apartment. Then I can relax.

A long day today. Nothing much I can do for myself. Maybe in a week from now I can go bike riding. On Tuesday I plan on having a blood and urine sample for an annual physical for the following week. That means I have to fast for tomorrow night and part of Tuesday morning.

[zapatoes]

I’m sleepy and need to get bed soon chilling with listening to nature sounds and it’s nice. Need to work on stress management since TMJ worse now and always affects left side of my jaw, and now my left shoulder hurts. Read online these symptoms could be related, TMJ pain can affect the neck and shoulders.

[regretful]

It wears you down like a sand dune near a beach...it erodes you so slowly, but it's there all the time...depression is simply a terrible thing...I wish all of you well in your struggle with this terrible affliction.

[Deilla]

I totally have unsupportive people in my life. I feel angry. My therapist upset me today and my mom just whined and complained. I'm not in a good mood.