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Legendary
downandlonely
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Member Since: Mar 2018
Location: United States
Posts: 10,760
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#541
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3rd rock, Breaking Dawn, Deilla, SprinkL3, T4bbyCat
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Deilla
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Legendary Wise Elder
Deilla
is napping.
Member Since: Oct 2017
Location: Limsa Lominsa
Posts: 29,398
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#542
I'm trying to be hopeful.
__________________ ‘Live for now,’ ‘This too shall pass,’ ‘Everything is happening for my good.’ |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Mountaindewed
NoahsArk30
Member Since: Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
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#543
I'm depressed but its not therapy or covid related. So I think I just slept badly last night and I'm still sort of down about Betty White.
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Legendary
Rose76
Treading water.
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 12,404
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#544
Kind of down today. I miss Christmas. My tree is still up. I'll start taking it down tonight. Packing up all the Christmas decorations makes me sad. Every year I go through this. Last year I got truly, very depressed. I don't want to get like that again. I don't think I'll feel as bad as last year.
Next I'll look forward to Spring. I love when the buds start coming out. I love when all the leaves and flowers on the trees are new and unblemished. Time seems to be passing very fast. Too fast. And I'm never caught up with what I need to get done. |
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Breaking Dawn
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Legendary
Breaking Dawn
Thankful for my blessings.
Member Since: Sep 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 16,689
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#545
Today was ok sometimes.
__________________ "Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot) "Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller) * * * * * * |
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Legendary
downandlonely
has no updates.
Member Since: Mar 2018
Location: United States
Posts: 10,760
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#546
Still quarantining. I'm handling it ok, but am bored.
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Grand Magnate
will19
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Member Since: Oct 2012
Posts: 3,612
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#547
My day is just beginning as of now. I got up a little bit later than I wanted to. I didn't sleep very well. After having coffee I'm going to clean for about two hours. It's weird how, while I'm in bed just before getting up, I feel like my world is going to crash. But then after breakfast I feel much better. The thing this is on my mind the most is having to move pretty soon. I'll miss where I now even though there's not much going for me and it's too costly. But I don't know where to go.
My sister and I had it out with each other a couple days ago. I finally stood up to her and told her not to call me anymore. She felt bad about it and so do I, but that's the way it goes. Her phone calls have been aggravating and I would end up feeling angry and depressed after talking to her. Also her son picked up COVID after he had gone to a big New Years Eve party. I thought that was really dumb. |
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SprinkL3
has no updates.
Member Since: Oct 2021
Location: DELETED
Posts: 2,752
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#548
Quote:
I'm sorry to hear about your anxieties and relational troubles with your sister. I, too, have issues with my family. I've also had to set boundaries. Do you have a strategy for moving? Do you plan on staying within the same state or moving out of state? Can you afford to stay within the same state to make it easier on you before you decide to move out of state? Sometimes self-care is all that it takes to help us with our mood modulation and energy levels. I used to struggle with suicidal thoughts every morning, ever since the pandemic began. But after about a year of therapy (my therapist used to send me "good morning" emails every morning during business days, in addition to biweekly online sessions), my suicidal thoughts dissipated. I now wake up without those thoughts, though I still feel fatigued and low energy. I also have a very unstable sleep schedule. But my T's therapy worked. My T no longer sends me emails every morning, but she still sees me online twice a week. That helps me with my other lingering conditions and symptoms. Do you have a good T who can help you with motivation, energy, goal-setting, interpersonal relationships, depression, anxiety, and more? Can you ask your T or a friend to be a check-in buddy in the mornings, just to give you something to look forward to in the mornings - even if it's once a week or a few times a week? That might make all the difference in not feeling so alone and disconnected. I have no one locally to do that, and my family isn't reliable (they've been perpetually dysfunctional). My friends are either too busy with work or too disabled to do that, so I didn't have anyone other than my T for a very long while. I'm starting to make new local friends - all whom are vaccinated and wear masks whenever they see me (even if I'm outside). I only see them outside for essentials, such as gift exchanges or donations or getting a safe ride to and from my doctor's appointments for things like vaccines. It helps to know a few people in real life and locally - even if they are mere acquaintances. Sadly, I don't get along with any of my neighbors because many of them remain unmasked and/or unvaccinated. However, I did see some progress in one of my neighbors when I noticed that she's now wearing masks while in the hallways of the apartment building. Before she was anti-mask. So that's something new. If you list the reasons why you're moving, including why you don't like living where you are at now, you might find the very things you are looking for in a new place. What will help you further is making a list of what your desires are, and then doing some research online to see how the communities are in terms of weather, political leanings, healthcare, crime rates, protests, zoning laws, ordinances, public safety, demographics, traffic, access to stores, access to online shopping and contactless deliveries, taxes, renters' rights, victims' rights, middle-aged and elderly rights, and whatever you will consider a "deal breaker." I wish you the best of luck on your move! Moving can be stressful, especially during a pandemic. However, it can also be exciting when you consider redecorating and refurnishing your new place, feeling as though you are starting out fresh again, and having the opportunity to make new and perhaps closer, lifelong friends. You might even find more services and healthcare benefits in your area, such as discounted rates for public transportation, tax breaks on certain things, better weather, lowered community polarization and discord, lowered crime rates, and more. |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Deilla
is napping.
Member Since: Oct 2017
Location: Limsa Lominsa
Posts: 29,398
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#549
The sun is going down and I'm getting depressed. I'm ready to sleep until sunrise.
__________________ ‘Live for now,’ ‘This too shall pass,’ ‘Everything is happening for my good.’ |
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Grand Magnate
will19
has no updates.
Member Since: Oct 2012
Posts: 3,612
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#550
I did some cleaning this morning and it went alright. This afternoon I got into an argument with my friend. Maybe I should have known better not to have mentioned to him about my possibility of moving, since he had to bring up that
I should try to look for a job. I'm not feeling motivated to get a job now after what I had been through and wanting to leave the area where I am. So I'm confused. The days are lousy now since I have been arguing with my sister and him. They are all that I have. It has sent me into deep depression and I'm feeling like there's no light at the end of the tunnel. And I'll be all alone because I can't seem to get along with anyone. I'd like to have someone to understand me, warts and all that I have now. |
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Legendary
Rose76
Treading water.
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 12,404
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#551
I just don't want to get out of bed.
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Account Suspended
SprinkL3
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Member Since: Oct 2021
Location: DELETED
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#552
I slept all day. I'm barely waking up in the evening as my "morning." I'm so backwards. LOL.
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Veteran Member
3rd rock
would rather be camping
Member Since: May 2019
Location: Canada
Posts: 519
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#553
I managed to take out the garbage yesterday. I had put off doing it for too long. Today I will do the dishes.
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Grand Magnate
will19
has no updates.
Member Since: Oct 2012
Posts: 3,612
1,097 hugs
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#554
I didn't sleep well last night. I felt very depressed this morning. Was having feelings that my world is coming to an end. Got busy with making my monthly batch of spaghetti sauce and some light work. Went for a long bike ride and that made me feel better.
The friend, whom I recently let go, sent me a message saying that he misses me. We've been through this before. |
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Elder
Cocosurviving
❄️Happy Winter Solstice!
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Member Since: Sep 2012
Location: Muscogee (Creek) Nation Reservation
Posts: 5,875
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#555
•I like this platform because it allows a different type of anonymity. •I don’t like when people assume everyone wants unsolicited advice. •Certain topics people should ask if you would like their feedback. •I like to post as a method of brain dumping and it helps me process my thoughts and feelings. •Certain Generations Were Taught Not to Make Trouble. Not to Question School Districts, Teachers, Doctors, Nurses, Police Etc •Advocating for Disability, Human and Civil Rights, Was/Is Viewed as “Making Trouble.” Colonial Culture Functions Around Certain Occupations Deemed as Noble and Untouchable. •Generations of People Were Taught to Compartmentalize Abuse, Trauma, Micro Racial Aggressions, Homophobia and Ableism. Now Toxic Positivity is Used as a Defense Mechanism to Function in Dysfunction. •People have a right to tell another person to leave them alone and stop giving unsolicited advice. •A savior complex, or white knight syndrome, describes this need to “save” people by fixing their problems. If you have a savior complex, you might: only feel good about yourself when helping someone. believe helping others is your purpose. expend so much energy trying to fix others that you end up burning out. •It does not matter if you feel you are right, if you feel the person is confused because YOUR views are different. If you work in blah blah occupation or are attending school. Respect boundaries when told to leave the person alone. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ #SpoonieStrong Spoons are a visual representation used as a unit of measure to quantify how much energy individuals with disabilities and chronic illnesses have throughout a given day. 1). Depression 2). PTSD 3). Anxiety 4). Hashimoto 5). Fibromyalgia 6). Asthma 7). Atopic dermatitis 8). Chronic Idiopathic Urticaria 9). Hereditary Angioedema (HAE-normal C-1) 10). Gluten sensitivity 11). EpiPen carrier 12). Food allergies, medication allergies and food intolerances. . 13). Alopecia Areata |
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hvert, will19
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Grand Magnate
will19
has no updates.
Member Since: Oct 2012
Posts: 3,612
1,097 hugs
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#556
Quote:
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Cocosurviving
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Legendary
Rose76
Treading water.
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 12,404
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5,302 hugs
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#557
Having a grief episode at the moment. Received something nice in the mail that reminds me of loved ones who are gone. Now I can't breathe through my nose. Sometimes being alive hurts.
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Legendary Wise Elder
Mountaindewed
NoahsArk30
Member Since: Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 35,836
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#558
I'm not depressed today. I'm anxious out of my mind though.
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Veteran Member
3rd rock
would rather be camping
Member Since: May 2019
Location: Canada
Posts: 519
5,805 hugs
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#559
I did the dishes yesterday. I feel like I woke up too late today to get much work done, but I'll try after supper. Tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment in the morning.
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Grand Magnate
will19
has no updates.
Member Since: Oct 2012
Posts: 3,612
1,097 hugs
given |
#560
I kept myself busy today. In the morning I emailed a couple of guys from my last job to see if there are any openings. Even though I left my job last June, I thought they might want me back. I'd love to go back if my former position can improve. One guy, from the site I worked at, told me that things are slow. He referred me to someone else, whom I used to know well. It's at another site. I got a message from him saying that a position like what I had is not available. Well, it's no skin off my nose, so I'm OK with it.
In the afternoon I wanted to do a little shopping. My car wouldn't start. It's because I have a dead battery. The shopping didn't need to be done soon anyways. So I'll have to get a new battery by tomorrow, if I can. I have a dental appointment tomorrow morning. It's a check up. I don't feel like there's anything wrong, but I dread going. I always dread going to a doctor and dentist. |
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