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Grand Magnate
Member Since Oct 2012
Posts: 3,616
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#421
Yesterday was a typical day. One thing that happened that was odd was my ex-friend's son called me suggested that I should at least send my ex-friend an email saying how I'm doing. According to him, my ex-friend feels really bad that we split up. It was hard talking to the son about all of this since I've never spoken to him before.
Nothing much planned for today. I'll see what unfolds for today. Lately things seem to be going on more than before, so that's kind of exciting. |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: Limsa Lominsa
Posts: 29,401
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#422
I had a good day but it's late now. This is when I get sad. I guess I can take my nighttime meds and go to bed.
__________________ ‘Live for now,’ ‘This too shall pass,’ ‘Everything is happening for my good.’ |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 9,514
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#423
I have been feeling really down. Lately people have been taking their anger out on me which has been hurting my feelings lately.
__________________ Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch. Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live. This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak. In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living. Like love, it's how we know we're alive. And life goes on. That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: Limsa Lominsa
Posts: 29,401
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#424
I feel okay. It's late. I haven't slept much. I feel like being active now while I feel good and then I'll sleep later.
__________________ ‘Live for now,’ ‘This too shall pass,’ ‘Everything is happening for my good.’ |
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#425
I really want people to stop going on about, I'm spending christmas with family, I'm going round a friends, I'm going to have lots of gifts and a big party
woop dee doo. I'm spending christmas alone, with no gifts and no party. sooo |
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2012
Location: USA -
Posts: 1,863
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#426
Visited the primary MD; prescription for Lexapro on the lowest possible dosage. Still have yet to pick it up as I'm reluctant to start...but I have to as living like this is not very bearable. I've had such trouble with depression over the years and this round of it seems to be just as bad as any other. No real enjoyment in life at all. And the co-occurring anxiety is nothing fun either. I wish all of you well in your personal struggle with this invisible monster.
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Oct 2012
Posts: 3,616
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#427
Just an ordinary day for me. I was surprised that I wasn't feeling too tired today since I didn't sleep well last night. I was blowing my nose for more than half the night. No cold, just allergies.
I have been feeling a little more empty during the nights now since I split up with my friend. We used to chat every night. I miss him but not his antics. Plus it's very hard to let go an only friend I have. Some people say it's nice being alone, but I feel that we all need a nice relationship of some kind. |
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 16,689
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#428
I have my fingers crossed for my accomplishing an important goal this morning.
__________________ "Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot) "Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller) * * * * * * |
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Member
Member Since Oct 2018
Location: US
Posts: 232
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#429
I've got nothing, really. Just attempting to sleep off the wine or worse. Likely worse and a lot thereof.
Need to free myself of physical possessions and be able to relocate quickly. |
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 16,689
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#430
__________________ "Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot) "Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller) * * * * * * |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 36,135
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#431
My SAD hasn't been too bad so far. But its usaully pretty calm during the holidays. Except for last year which I'm still trying to process. I have zero energy right now and I don't even have the energy to peel a hardboiled egg. But I'm not sure thats depression.
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Oct 2012
Posts: 3,616
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#432
Felt depressed and blue throughout the whole day today. I still think about my ex-friend whom I let go a couple of weeks ago. I feel like I have nothing now.
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: Limsa Lominsa
Posts: 29,401
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#433
I'm having a difficult time sleeping, but I'm making the best of it. I played my game for a while and now I'm cooking.
__________________ ‘Live for now,’ ‘This too shall pass,’ ‘Everything is happening for my good.’ |
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 16,689
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#434
I'm doing a little better right now. I'm looking forward to fulfilling a goal today, maybe two.
__________________ "Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot) "Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller) * * * * * * |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 36,135
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#435
I was doing ok until about noon. This happened last year. Its just SAD. Although my dads wake was 7 years ago today. We didn't have the best relationship after he got sick though so O don't think its heavily affecting me today. Maybe I'll start using my SAD lamp.
I plan on getting some oranges in the morning to see if that helps my depression at all. __________________ Ridin' with Biden |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: Limsa Lominsa
Posts: 29,401
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#436
This evening is hard. I haven't heard from my therapist at all today. She's supposed to check in with me M through F. That's what I pay for but it didn't happen. I think I just need to quit therapy. It causes more harm than good. The responses aren't much most of the time. She ignores most of what I have to say. It's pointless.
__________________ ‘Live for now,’ ‘This too shall pass,’ ‘Everything is happening for my good.’ |
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Veteran Member
Member Since May 2019
Location: Canada
Posts: 525
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#437
I just finished the first draft of a new novel. It's not a romance novel, but it follows a relationship between two people. It ends with them splitting up after their relationship falls apart. It includes the viewpoint character committing acts of infidelity late in the story. One beta reader tells me I must rewrite it so the characters are together at the end. But I feel this would completely change the tone of the novel. I'm not sure what to do.
I want to get an agent with this novel. I'm trying to write it from the point of view of a fictional memoir, like the main character is using it to confess his sins. But I fear a lack of commercial potential for a book I want to get published conventionally. I'm kind of at a crossroads. |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: Limsa Lominsa
Posts: 29,401
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6 49.2k hugs
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#438
I heard late from my therapist. All she told me to do was to get more active on social media. That will cure my loneliness. Most of the people are strangers or totally not interested in what I have to say.
__________________ ‘Live for now,’ ‘This too shall pass,’ ‘Everything is happening for my good.’ |
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Legendary
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 16,689
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#439
@Deilla, I think it's good to listen to your own instincts & not listen to your therapist's advice. I don't belong to any of those social media networks. I've read that they can be harmful to us emotionally.
__________________ "Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot) "Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller) * * * * * * |
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Deilla
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Where the sidewalk ends
Posts: 36,135
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7 8,749 hugs
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#440
I have this compulsion almost to only eat one type of food. But that will just fuel this depression even more. I was able to pull myself away from it but what I'm eating now isnt much better. I need a steak and potato dinner.
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