no one understands

*sigh*. i'm getting tired of explaining myself. i'm spiraling downward lately and i can't pick myself up. i guess that's besides the point though... what no one understands is the fact that it is so very complicated for me to speak. i don't really expect anyone to understand though since i myself can't even explain it.. it's not that i'm not capable of talking, it's just hard.

lately people have been asking me so much, 'why aren't you saying anything?'. what can i tell them? i have nothing to say! for the life of me i can't think of anything to say! if i think for five minutes or so i may blurt out a one line sentence such as "it's cold outside isn't it?" it sounds so stupid and it drains my energy. when i'm around people i just think 'please don't say anything to me!' just so i don't have to respond back. i'm starting to think this isn't even a sort of mental disorder... maybe it's just my plain stupidity. i've never even seen or heard of another person struggling with my same situation.

i'll thank everyone now for replying to this... since the words may not come later

Hey Sweetie, I've been there, I does feel kinda weird doesn't it. hey I'll be here for you, can I ask you a ?

IF So......

How long Have you felt like this?

Also If you do rec. this could you please let me know because I'm not sure what to press to send. Besides Ms. Kimmydawn you'r the 1st person I chose to talk with.

Anony, lots of us here understand! There's many of us here that have depression. You bet that finding something to say is hard work!

Be kind to yourself and don't beat yourself up about it. Do you see a therapist? If not, you really need to. Maybe you need something to help you out of your depression. It's tough, I know.

I use to have that problem all the time in my therapy sessions. I literally could not speak, just had conversations happening in my head that couldn't find their way out.

Can you practice talking to yourself out loud when you are with yourself? It's like the Tin Man, we rust shut I think. Practice saying out loud what you think in your head occasionally, comment to yourself about the sound of your voice, any dumb thing that springs into your mind. That will lubricate the connection a little and be a voice you're responding to (nevermind that it's your own :-)

I've felt that way before. Try not to freak out. It will get better. Don't put pressure on yourself to be different. Just accept that you need a rest and do something nice for yourself.

I understand I find it hard to open up to - of all people - my therapist. I'm afraid to cry and reveal what I consider embarrasing things to her. Silly I know, but I've always had a hard time opening up.

I also say silly things to people I know. Partly because I can't think of anything else to say and partly because I use humor as my defense.

Don't beat yourself up over it. It's OK - lots of us have been there. Do something nice for yourself today - even if it's something free like a bubble bath or looking at kittens on the internet. You deserve a smile! And most of all, remember that we are here for you!

Namaste,
Misty

{{Anony}}

> lately people have been asking me so much, 'why aren't you saying anything?'. what can i tell them?

Memorize this to say to them:

"May the bird of paradise fly up your nose."

Well, even if you don't want to say that, you can think it...

Wow! That's the first time i've seen someone been able to explain that, i'm the same way.. I sadly try and ignore ppl just so i don't have to respond to them. I understand how your feeling. maybe it will get better for us

(((((((((((( Anony ))))))))))))