sorry

TodayI feel hopeless, worthless, tired, emotional .... in other words a complete %#@&#! up .....

I have this feeling where my insides are heavy, i want to cry. My dad is a horrible horrible man ..... no feelings, my mother is out of my life....

how in hells name can i love me if my parents hated me so much .... my hubby and kids keep telling me to forget them .... is it me or isthat a bit harder to do ???????

i want to lash out at everything and everybody because i am hurting so much. i want to lock myself away. i'm not allowed to say what i really want to do.....

so ....sorry i'm apain in the arse yet again .... but that's how i'm feeling

me

((((((((((((((( jinny )))))))))))))))
never a pain my friend, and it is incredibly hard to "forget" the abusive family

(((((((((((jinnyann))))))))))

You're not a pain Jinny.

Have you tried to tell your husband that it's not so easy to forget your own family, no matter how badly they have treated you?

(((((((((jinny)))))))))))

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((jinnyann)))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Yes, it is very hard to forget people that were so involved in your life. I am sorry that you are hurting so much.

BB

Dear Jinny,

Today is a dark day, probably, not unlike many dark days past. As terrible, as you may feel this very moment. Please remember, you have been here before, and it passed; it always does. The dark feelings, you are experiencing, will pass, as surely as the Sun will rise.

I am not suggesting, to suppress your feelings. Let your feelings flow freely. Just don't loose sight, of the joy lying ahead. It may only be, just a heartbeat away.

Larry

((((((((((((((my friends)))))))))))))))00

yes i have told my husband and 2 children, they understand, just dont like to see me hurting ... they have been so good today ...

I've spent the entire afternoon watching the equestrian (showjumping)olympics .... not done a thing around the house. I was lost in that for a while .... horses are a passion of mine, i love them so much ......

then our IRL best friends came around and ended up booking a holiday in cornwall the same time we're going .... so we all have something great to look forward to ..... we always go away with them, Daria and I have been friends since infant school, she is suffering with depression right now and we were feeling sorry for ourselves so we came up with the idea of them coming with us

We all love cornwall so this will be a nice break .... you were right about something good happening in the beat of a heart Malachite bless you Jinny xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

(((Jinnyann))) its ok kiddo, sometimes you have irreconcilable differences, even with those who are supposed to be close to you.

Sometimes you reach a point where you have to let go and move on. You have done your best to make things better between you, and thats all you can do, no more.

Sometimes there are situations where it is simply better to walk away..

Best of luck getting through this

((((((((((((((((((tim))))))))))))))))))

thankyou so much for always supporting me ..... you are a star ... and you are right, my life became better after saying goodbye to mum ... so, i hardly ever see my dad anyway and he never calls, so just trying to think of it like that i suppose ... sigh huggies, Kerry xoxoxoxoxo

Hi Jinny, your parents didn't give you what you needed because of their problems. They didn't give you what you needed because you didn't deserve it. Every child deserves the best possible upbringing. Many of us didn't get it, however, because our parents had problems that they didn't deal with correctly (and they got these problems because of their parents!).

You can learn to love yourself (inner child work). We do learn to love and take care of ourselves by our parents loving and taking care of us but even if they do not we can still learn how to do it. You deserve to be loved and taken care of and you can learn how to do it.

You sound angry and feel like you have no right to be?

%#@&#! your parents, and love yourself....

Okay, that was harse, but you get the idea. Parents don't go to school and learn how to be parents, unfortunately, and they are prone to the same mistakes, neuroses, insanity as the rest of us. Leave them behind for now, focus on the now and the YOU...and eventually you will come to understand that while your parents made you, you are still flexible to create a self very much independent of the flawed one they might have created! Both Sannah and I as well as most everyone else are here to help provide feedback, suggestions, and suppport. We are here and we understand,

Peter B.

((((((((((((Kerry))))))))))

((((((((jinny))))))
Remember we all love you here at PC

(((((Jinnyann)))))
YOu are never a pain dear, keep talking I am always here to listen