ok i feel down now... geez i as just talking to doc john feeling ok well now i just feel bad and especially fat.. I just ate a healthy pear but yea that made me feel fat again and then i started thinking which is a bad sign i guess cause i thought about how people made fun of me and beat me for being fat. i feel like chucking everything i ate today... gosh how can i be such a pig.. tomorrow no more food except for small amounts.. im sick of being fat.. im sick of thinking how bad it is to be fat.... im sick of being depressed for being fat. i am sorry bout being a fat whinny baby just sick of this life i have... not a nite goes by which i dont think one day down a bagillion to go... i m sorry i will shut up now
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