[truthseeker18]

I want to be the best that I can be. Yet I fear that I may never achieve this. In 2003 with help aid of my Psychiatrist we stopped medication then in 2004 I had wieght loss surgery and lost 200 pounds and I have gained 60 of it back since I moved back to California in Nov. of 06. I had 4 jobs and the last one I was fired from. I am now back on ssi and ssa waiting for my classes to start in apiril. I thought that things were only going to get better for. Hadden I been through enough already. Mulested at 9, Rapped at 12, married at 18, the mother of 4 at 21, relized I was in a bad relationship at 19, found out that my brother who had died at age 16 was molested and rapped by our its hard for me to say even now, went to a battered woman's shelter at 38, Diagnoised with biopolor at 27, in and out of hospitals between the ages of 29 and 44...... Anyway after my surgury and my regular therapy session I finally thought I had a life coming to me. One that I could finally be proud of but instead its been one hurdle after another most I took in stride and kept doing my affirmations and believing that I was going to make it. Well I its almost 5 years later and I can't help feeling like I the biggest skrew up that this world has ever seen, if the world were looking, most of the time I feel invisible. Thanks for listening Bobbi

[DianasClan]

I wish I could wave a magic wand and make it all better. If anyone deserves that it is you.

Sorry but hugs will have to do.

((((((((Bobbie)))))))))

Diana's Clan

[reach]

Bobbi,

Know that no matter what negative situations you have been in and are in right now - there is always a way out. There is always light at the end of the tunnel, have that faith and it will be true for you.

Keep it up - one step at at time.

This is my heartfelt blessing to you, I hope it helps.

Do come back here, if you need a boost. PM me if you like.

http://www.mayyoubeblessedmovie.com/
With much love and blessing,

Reach

[madisgram]

truthseeker it sounds like to me you are willing to be the best u can be. when there are multiple issues like you have i'm sure it will take more time to untangle all the hurts and other feelings you have about each event that has brought you down.
are U seeing a T at the present to help you work through all this/jme, but that was the only way i could have gotten thru so mcuh of the confusion of so many things i had gone thru. we took our time and addressed each one by itself. that way it was far less overwhelming. my T also taught me coping skills i had never had before. i learned how to process the feelings in therapy and regain my "self".
i'm hoping maybe something i've said will offer you hope too. having a T really was the key for me along with meds, in my case.
please keep us posted on how you are doing, k? we do care and you do matter to us!!

[gimmeice]

Hello truthseeker, it's nice to meet you. Welcome to psych central.
Please don't see yourself as a failure, like everyone you are a work in progress, maybe you need some more time to work on your issues. Instead of looking at what you haven't accomplished try to look at what you have accomplished in life.
If you have any questions feel free to private message any community liaison or moderator, here is a link to a list of forum leaders.
http://forums.psychcentral.com/showgroups.php