Silence

I don't want hugs or sympathy or whatever, but I don't want to be alone

I'm struggling today, it's only morning too. I'm stuck for words, but I've got so much emotion and thoughts in my head.

Hurt, scared and alone.

(Although I'm not alone, I'm with someone who's gonna make my day harder)

I want to be able to get these thoughts out

((moon)))))) i understand needing to share and needing to share without bringing others down... it was sooooooo hard for me to find people to listen and understand... it takes time for us to be ready to be able to understand how we can share with others in a way that doesnt send them running... for me, i had to overcome my anger issues first.. no one could hear what i was saying, only that i was extremely agitated..

finally i was able to see how i was self sabotaging my attempts to connect and share what was bothering me... slowly i learned that speaking slowly, purposefully, i was better able to get my message across and people did care, did listen, were also concerned about many of the same things as i was and did want to help.... it was about respecting them as i learned to speak in an inoffensive manner and i dont blame any of them for any reactions.. i am just thankful that my society didnt give up on me, i was able to try again and again... true, they were different people each time (excepting some family) cause my own fears wouldnt let me return to those i had done damage to while i was coming to understanding.. i pray each are well on their own now, with friends and family to love them

another thing that helped me and still helps me is praying, God or a Higher Power of your own choosing can hear all, and cares for all...

i will pray and hope this helps and always hoping you find your way through the darkness

silver moon, i've been in that dark place you are in now. do you feel comfortable sharing with us about the hurt and feeling alone? it may be easeir to write it here at pc. i believe you know that we do care about you a lot. glad you let us know how difficult your day is.

*sits with you*

I'm always here if you want to talk, about nothing , everything, or anything inbetween.

ima send a few hugs your way neways
I hope you don't mind

sits with you

((((((((((( ntr )))))))))))) thank you
that did help and it's given me a little more hope. Being able to talk is something I will work on with my T when I start seeing her
take care

I do know that you care I just find it very difficult to talk sometimes, but I'm trying to work on that. It's just difficult when I'm struggling because I don't know how to talk about it, but I don't like feeling that I'm stuck or trapped with my own thoughts. I'm not sure I explained that well



Thank you, I don't mind the hugs it's just like I said to Madi. I wrote the post because I didn't want to feel trapped and I didn't know how best to explain that then.
Thank you for your offer. I always feel like a burden if I tell individuals (even a thread on PC) my thoughts and problems... maybe that's another reason I can't talk so good?

That means more than you'll know to me. Thank you both
and that was lovely Prue

((moon))) silence is what locks the doors and holds us inside, preventing us from making the true connections to others that we are seeking.. when we can reach into the inner side of ourself and connect with the pains we are taking chances, risks that the feelings we have held so long might overcome and overwhelm us... but dont worry here... you are safe here.... you can give us small parts of your story at a time, work on one thing and then when you are settled there, move forward... it takes time and little by little we have breakthroughs... never give up on you or on the kind caring attitude of others at our great little community.. we are not all pro's but i know the care is real and we try hard to help...

first, accept that you are accepted.. accept that we will not judge or worship you... we will listen and care and when we can, we will give some ideas that may or may not help you.. your success with this depends on you.. we all have days when it seems like we are going nowhere but its not true.. the pain is not really our friend or where we want to stay, but it is what it is right now and if we are careful and loving and gentle to our own self about all this, if we can see that compassion does exist and is present in the words we read here, we can then begin to believe there is a way out of the mess and there is a time of joy for us in the future somewhere.. there will be heartache as we examine the hurts and memories but there is joy and hope and laughter in the ways we overcome and defeat the darkness.. there is joy in connecting with others also struggling and together guiding each other on our way to a more pleasant shore, somewhere in the distance now, but it is there all the same... you can arrive there too... together we can make the distance, the difference, and see the promise of life unfold for us.. in time.. it takes hard work and relentless pursuing, but know, KNOW, that it is there and it belongs to you to have, share and give to all those you know... and if they dont want it for themselves? you can tell yourself that is a truly sad thing..

(((((((((((((((silver_moon))))))))))))))))

CAN YOU PAINT A PICTURE? SOMETIMES THOUGHTS/FEELINGS CAN COME OUT THAT WAY. OR PLAY AN INSTRUMENT. OR EVEN JUST LISTEN TO MUSIC. WALK IN THE PARK OR THE WOODS. BUILD SOMETHING--LIKE A SNOWMAN...
SOMETIMES WORDS JUST DON'T CUT IT, YA KNOW????


ps Maybe if you act super nice to person who is going to make your day harder, you will confuse the heck out of him????? LOL

NEVER a burden.

That feeling is probably stopping you, yes, but I don't think you're a burden especially here on PC if you talked