[Crew]

Well, the Holidays are so not good for our system and although we have grounding skills that work they are only now starting to work sometimes. Let me see if I can explain this...

The holidays have become more and more stranger as the year's have gone by, now we mainly spend Christmas with my friend/landlord's family which comes to my home, my space as well. So it's not like I can go home. People (her family) make comments and my friend chooses to ignore it as if it is an isolated incident or something. Each year the comments get more rude and harsh and what feels like to us of being pushed aside in our own home. It hurts deeply and we know it's our way of viewing it and we've tried to be positive about it.

Some of the ideas that have worked like a charm in the past still helps and we usually end up doing this anyway.
We excuse ourselves and hear them having a good ole time and our mind begins to wander and thinking that becomes dwelling on what we have been learning about where we came from and not knowing where we belong pushes us to the breaking point.
We have prepared our grounding skills, drawing supplies, our dark dark chocolate and atomic fireballs...
We were just wondering if anyone could add some things that work for you. Please give us Positive ideas since negative ideas most of the time = negative consequences ya know?
Thanks for all input...ThaCrew

[WePow]

Crew - big safe hugs!!! For us, we tend to have to rely on our protector alter Elaine to help us make it through these types of encounters. I know it may not be a healthy long term solution, but in our case - it is better than splitting into a negative alter and having things come back to haunt us.

We also will make sure we take alot of breaks from others - like go outside to just take in some fresh air. Or we have a list of jokes in our mind and use them to change the subject when it gets rough :-)

[anderson]

(((((Crew))))) Just be true to your self if you find that it is not working for you to be near someone then leave the room. You are the master on coping skills but even being one of many we still have our limits. May the Great spirit bless you and your gathering with love and kindness so that all may find peace with each other this year.

[Hunny]

Crew, we relate to those times when everyone around is like 'over-there' in our mind and we are alone.

We countered some of this by removing ourself from the room (like the others have mentioned). Go to another room, usually with picture books (you know those coffee table books). Also, we found the tv room and watched a christmas show and/or hung out with the other ones that had that alone kind of look to them and just sat beside, not talking. Playing with the kids helped too.

Now with current family we can go to our own room it being in the same place...maybe we'll check in here (PC) at that time. We not be alone with other's here and also we have not been at PC over a christmas before.

We also have a special thing to do the next day after Christmas Day, so we not holding it up as the most important day (even if spiritually, may be pretty big).

We are upset that such a wonderful person as yourself should be treated with anything less than high regard, Crew. Are these people's tongues loose b/c of alcohol or are they always so crude (sorry we come to your defense).

Remember your aquaintances and friends here...okay Crew? And thank you for telling me to buy my alters things, including toys. I did! It was fun at the dollar store and not too expensive! You must have soooo many toys now. We'd come and play cars with you.


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(((Crew)))
Since it is your space also, can you speak to you landlord before hand and set aside "your private space" ? Where you, alone can go to breath and relax.
If people are ignorant or rude, can you say in your head "They don't know any better, poor things" ??
We wish you a peaceful holiday.

[Crew]

We don't use the Love word too much because 99.9% of the time it is full of brown stuff

However we just can't think of any other word that works except

the usual , and the word we don't use much...

We love you guys.... ThaCrew

Back at ya, (((Crew)))

[multipixie9]

Crew,

If I understood you correctly they are coming to Your home and then treating you badly. If that is what you were saying I would advise you to "have plans" (made well in advance) that will prevent you from having a get together at your home. Even if your plan is simply imaginary it will give you an "out" where you need not subject yourself to unkindness in your own home from people who are supposed to be appreciative guests.

Sorry this has happened to you and hope you are OK now that it is past.

Concerned Hugs,

Leslie/Pixies

[Hunny]

Crew & Calista & Multipixie9 & Wpowers & Anderson
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