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  #1  
Old Aug 09, 2005, 02:03 PM
white_iris
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deedee's hiding, vicki is mad and hurting, others are wanting to be heard and i'm getting the fallout from it all. i am so tired and so drained. i'm feeling like i can't hold it all together much longer. bits and flashes of graphic memory. like some kind of fast movie too fast to catch what anything really is. eyes open or closed it just flashes on.

have my final tonight in sign language. gotta be able to focus. supposed to go to the funeral home now wife of one of my H co-workers died-cancer 52--my age. i think i will go hide.
w_i

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  #2  
Old Aug 09, 2005, 02:09 PM
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Gemstone Gemstone is offline
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((((((((((( w_i )))))))))))))) feeling really bad-need support feeling really bad-need support
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  #3  
Old Aug 09, 2005, 02:11 PM
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((((((((((white iris))))))))))
  #4  
Old Aug 09, 2005, 03:03 PM
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w_i,

You really need to try and get some rest. feeling really bad-need support

Too much, too fast is not good. I just went through this myself. I am under "call and check in with T daily" because of this. (Some people might like the sound of that, I find it punishment)

You need to be able to stay safe.

I'm sorry about your co-worker's wife. These things have a way of knocking us on our butts as well.

You are under way too much stress.

Check in often.

I'll have you in my thoughts.

Petunia
  #5  
Old Aug 09, 2005, 03:28 PM
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White Iris
I agree with Petunia. I have just been there - yesterday with my T and then with my Dr - and wasn't able to hold stuff together.

Can you tell Deedee and vicki that they can have their time but not now? Perhaps you can tell them when you can give them time? I don't know, I'm no good at this myself; all too new for me to be much help.

I find doing something rhythmic helps mine. Swimming is good for me. The memories get processed a bit without all the pain.

Do you have anything you can take to calm you a little? Not easy with an exam, but what about a herbal remedy? A relaxation tape?

Wish I could come up with something useful for you. Thinking of you all even tho I can't be much use. Sorry.

((((((((W_I))))))))))) ((((((((((((deedee))))))))))((((((((((vicki))))))))))))) ((((((((((((((((((others)))))))))))))))))

Caroline
  #6  
Old Aug 09, 2005, 03:33 PM
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(((((((((((((((((white iris)))))))))))))))) feeling really bad-need support
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  #7  
Old Aug 09, 2005, 04:15 PM
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dragonskin dragonskin is offline
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here - you can have my lanmby to cuddle if you need to. feeling really bad-need support
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The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood.
For nothing now can ever come to any good.


W.H. Auden -Funeral Blues
  #8  
Old Aug 10, 2005, 02:13 AM
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shadowdancer shadowdancer is offline
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i'm so sorry you're having such a difficult time w_i. i know that Vicki and both deedees are too. i am sending warm thoughts your way and i hope everything gets better. please do get some rest after your exam, if you are able.

((((((((((w_i)))))))))))))
((((((((little deedee)))))))))))
((((((((big deedee)))))))))))))
((((((((((((Vicki))))))))))))))
****group hug****

take care of yourselves and PM me anytime you need/want to. that goes for you too, w_i, not just vicki and deedee feeling really bad-need support

-shadow
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i tear my heart open
i sew myself shut
my weakness is
that i care too much
the scars remind me
the past is real
i tear my heart open
just to feel
~Papa Roach
  #9  
Old Aug 10, 2005, 06:23 AM
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allthegirls6 allthegirls6 is offline
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WHITE IRIS, i HOPE DEEDEE AND VICKI CAN COME TOGETHER A BIT AND MAYBE HELP YOU WITH ALL THE UPSET. i KNOW HOW YOU MUST FEEL. iT TOUGH WHEN THE OTHERS ARGUE OR HAVE DIFERENT ISSUES AND FEEKLING AND ALL OF THEM WANT TO BE RECOGNISED AND DEALT WITH AT THE SAME TIME. bE VERY KIND TO YOURSEF
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good things come to those who wait, and wait and wait
  #10  
Old Aug 10, 2005, 06:24 AM
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allthegirls6 allthegirls6 is offline
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OOOOPPPPS, my last post is in capitals and I know that is like shouting but Im not. I made a mistake. Please dont think Im shouting. IOwould never do that to you W I. Hope no offence is taken.

Lots of Love

Audrey XXXXX ( )
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feeling really bad-need support

good things come to those who wait, and wait and wait
  #11  
Old Aug 10, 2005, 10:42 AM
white_iris
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thanks everyone--no offence taken audrey--
have no clue how i did on the exam. my instructor is a good friend and she knows of my DID so i did clue her in before hand. we made it through anyway. i know i made a couple of stupid mistakes, but i have a high A so my instructor said not to worry.

deedee is still hiding except for a couple of little spurts. vicki is still sulking. there was no help from them on the exam. they usually help alot. especially both deedees as they *love* signing.

well, getting ready to go to a funeral. i am hoping everyone stays in and quiet. funerals trigger lots of stuff. H will be there so i think we'll be ok.

thanks again for all your support.
w_i
  #12  
Old Aug 10, 2005, 11:57 AM
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Yes, funerals are not easy.

I have you in my thoughts.

Petunia
  #13  
Old Aug 10, 2005, 12:44 PM
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MacD MacD is offline
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((((((((((((((((((((((white iris)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
So sorry that all of you are having such a tough day. Be good to yourself and know that we're all keeping you in our thoughts.Love Grace
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  #14  
Old Aug 12, 2005, 10:58 AM
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allthegirls6 allthegirls6 is offline
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Hello WI, how are you doing. We all wondering about you.

feeling really bad-need support
Iris (((((((((((((((((((((((W I)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
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feeling really bad-need support

good things come to those who wait, and wait and wait
  #15  
Old Aug 12, 2005, 12:32 PM
white_iris
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i'm ok Iris--thanks. Feeling really tired. deedee got to talk to T yesterday and she is really drained. it was hard for her. but she feels better too.
how are YOU doing??
w_i
  #16  
Old Aug 12, 2005, 12:34 PM
white_iris
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thanks (((((((((everyone)))))))) for the support. funeral went ok. one more sign language class on tues. then i start getting my stuff together to teach sign in sept. i just hope that i can do this.
w_i
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