[Monty_girl]

Think I'm going manic again. This is the second time this year. Jan was the last time I was manic. Sleep yeah, who needs it. I can't keep my thoughts together. Just speed talking 4-5 different subjects at the same time. It doesn't really bother me though when I get like this. I get alot done. ya know. But yeah I don't like the down side. Think T was worried in jan with it. I don't know what he'll say think time. maybe I can hide it. I've had extreme depressions since I was like 10 yrs old. Kind where you couldn't get me out of bed. but I don't mind getting alot done. I can get so much done.
Monty

[silver_queen]

Hey Monty,

Are there any meds you can take to help with the mania, or anything you can do to lower the high? I don't know much about it, sorry. Perhaps your t could give suggestions. I hope you don't have a bad low. I think that if you did tell your t when you get depressed again, it might help because then you wouldn't feel so isolated, and he could support you through it. Just a thought. Take care.

[Myzen]

Hi Monty,

I know it's hard for you to hear this just at the moment, but maybe you could check your meds and see if you can level out before you come down?

I think you are a bit worried, as you have posted here. It would be really good if you could avoid a big comedown.

Hope you'll keep in touch with us.

Cheers, M

[Gemstone]

I am at the same place right now. Really manic.

Try to sleep and not take too much from the manic and the crash wont be so bad afterwards.

Probably a good idea to get your meds checked if you are on them.

Take care of yourself.

[kimmydawn]

(((((((((((((((monty))))))))))))))))) i'm hoping it will fizzle out this time. another thought, you seem to be coming out of a pretty agitated depression. could it be that you're just feeling better and not used to it, or are you pretty sure it's another mania coming? i hope not

i think you need to be honest with t immediately, that way the two of you can work on something that might take some of the harsher edges off of it.

i hope it calms soon sweetie,

love ya,

kd

[Monty_girl]

HI Silver, I don't know about any meds. When this happened in Jan. I didn't know I was manic till T said it. I thought I was just in a really cool mood. Scared of taking any meds. I've been in a deep depression for a long time, like months. And it's like I woke up on top of the world the other morning. Just don't like telling T. Embarrassed.

[Monty_girl]

Hi M, not on any meds right now. Think T was just hoping it was a one time thing eariler in the year. I've had the extremes depressions, they aren't good. I've had psychotic depressions, where I would have hallucinations and all. I'm worried about having those again then being manic right now. I don't want those.

[Monty_girl]

TY GEM, I'm trying to sleep as much as I can. I feel my body get tried and I lay down and feel like I have to jump up as soon as I'm laying down. Going away this week-end and I'm just like jumping out of my skin wanting to leave. I c T next thursday, so I'm wondering right now if I'll be like this when I see him?? I just don't know.

[Monty_girl]

((((((((((((((((((( KD )))))))))))))))))) Love Ya too.

I feel like my head is going 90 mph and I can't keep up with it. For a few days I felt pretty good and pretty normal. Had energy to actually got some work done, but now I can't keep track of anything I'm doing. Feeling a little worse then I did in Jan. I told T then I was so great and I couldn't sit for a few of our sessions. That's when he said we were manic after watching us jump around his office a few sessions after being so depression we laid on the couch and were very "s". Feel like I have to do this and do that and go here and there. Last night I drove to Nashville because I wanted chilli. Got lots of plans and I need to go shopping. And ppl just make me so mad. Get so frustrated with everyone. Hard to be honest with T cause one scared and 2 embarrassed. With a strong family history of BP and Schizophrenia scared to ever say anything. hmmm hmm ok, lost from where i'm at. sorries monty

[kimmydawn]

((((((((((((((monty)))))))))))))))

i sure sounds BP type pattern. i really think you need to talk to t about this, sweetie. i know fear and embarassment. i've soooooooo been there this last month with t. however, y'all are braver than i am. you can do this.

also, just another thought. i'm still getting caught up on the fact that i think BP would've manifested way before now. however, i don't know enough about it to know. so along that lines of thinking...might it be that you're being heavily influenced by inside right now? might be?

i wish i knew more honey.

love ya more,

kd

[Monty_girl]

((((((((((((((((((((((((KD))))))))))))))))))))))))

I'm not sure about being influenced by my pieces inside. Seems/ feels like I'm very distant from them right now. Like I can't reach them. My mind is racing so fast I can't reach or communicate with them in any way. Not sure if it's just so triggering are now this is a way I'm dealing with it??? A few days ago when I felt "normal", it felt like I was a whole person and this is the way I was meant to be. But then my head just felt like it just started racing and I can't slow down and stop and think. Feels good but bad at the same time.