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#1
Aug 06, 2015, 12:35 PM
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Hello, I'm new on this particular site. I was just wondering if anyone can shed light for me on integration. Is it that the thousands of question will create questions inside that makes it scary? For instance, will all inner communication cease, no loss time, being aware of all traumatic /memories from the gaps throughout my life, no switching, getting use to not hearing the communication less anxiety etc. WHat happens with the other diagnoses ptsd, depression, and anxiety ? How close would a person be compared to a Singleton that is intregrated? I'm sorry, if my post is silly.
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#2
Aug 06, 2015, 01:23 PM
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in general integration is something every human being does every day.. the definition of integration is processing or putting together things and information... examples of normal every day integration...when someone mixes two alcoholic drinks they are integrating those two ingredients into one drink. another example of normal integration making a post here on psych central. to make a post someone is combining the use of a computer, use of the internet, use of a website, use of the websites capabilities of posting, a key board, letters to make words, words to make sentences, sentences to make paragraphs, then they use the websites capabilities to submit reply so that their post shows up on the website forum boards. integration of DID alternate personalities is just combining many things...therapy for stabilizing your present every day life through the use of a therapist, medications if needed, learning about yourself and your problems, learning how to manage your problems with out using your dissociation skills, learning grounding and other therapeutic techniques that can help you manage and have a better life,....this in technical terms is called trauma therapy. in some cases once a person's life is stable and they have all the tools needed to not dissociate another trauma related therapy is added which is working on the deeper trauma related things like discussing and working out what traumatic events happened to cause a person to become DID to begin with this is not a necessary component because many people with DID do not have access to their trauma memories, those memories have been dissociated and stored with in the alters. not having these memories is called dissociative amnesia and no or limited co consciousness with in the host (in this case Im talking about body born person) and the alters (between each other or the host) those that have co consciousness are able to work on their trauma related memories, those who do not have co consciousness are not able to work on those trauma memories until .....after ....the alters have integrated. what I have described in reference to integration of alters is the natural process. once a person diagnosed with DID is stable and able to handle their problems and life with out dissociation they are able to do all the things the alters jobs, purposes, reasons for being created were, as a result the alters just naturally combine with the person in which they reside (meaning everything they were ..their memories, their emotions, their mannerisms, habits...everything mixes in with that of the person they reside with in which means they are all one whole person again.) what happens with the other diagnosis's well though therapy, meds and such the other diagnosis are taken care of at the same time. a persons diagnosis naturally changes over time because the physical body does not stay the same, even in normal people the physical body matures, they learn how to handle their anxiety, depression and such. its the same with mental disorders no matter which mental disorder a person has, on one psychiatric evaluation they may show up as having anxiety but the next one no anxiety disorder because they have been in therapy and learned how to take care of that. with DID a person and their alters are in treatment for many many years some as long as 20-30 years. thats 20-30 years of learning how to take care of all those problems when integration happens usually most of those problems no longer exist because they have been in treatment for so many years. Im integrated, my mental disorders are less now because a great many of them were taken care of over the many years I have been in therapy. also periodically diagnostic change (which just happened in 2013 here in america) so many people who had some mental disorders well their diagnosis have changed or no longer a mental disorder and their symptoms fit other medical mental and normal diagnosis's. Im not sure what you mean how close a person has to be compared to a singleton. here in america you either meet the diagnostic criteria or you dont. If you dont meet the diagnostic criteria then treatment providers can not legally call you DID here in America. doing so is called possibly creating false mental disorders in someone and thats grounds for losing their treatment provider credentials. you can see what the diagnostic criteria are for having DID with in my link at the bottom of my post. everyone's internal system of alters may be comprised differently (what their alters jobs, purpose, reasons for being created are, for example ) but for diagnosis purposes this is what treatment providers here in america go by, as to whether someone has DID or not. other locations may have other standards and diagnostics. |
 Gr3tta
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#3
Aug 07, 2015, 06:06 AM
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amandalouise makes some great points. DID therapy is a longterm proposition. Integration is really a natural process. The human organism naturally heals, the opposite of entropy, amazing stuff. Taking some deep breaths and accepting just where you are right now is a great first step. Finding and working with a therapist you can deeply trust is essential.
I look at integration (which I have not achieved) as gathering up, listening to and loving lost pieces of yourself. As you do that, these parts will be drawn to each other and care for each other. But it takes time. Hope this helps.
__________________
 FlockPride
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#4
Aug 07, 2015, 12:38 PM
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AmandaLouise,
Thanks for your inciteful post, but I don't want it to be said that I am afraid of integration without even knowing what to be afraid of like I read that most people are! My simply question is, what will I lose with integration?? I'm already well versed at understanding Dissociative Identity Disorder ma'am/sir. If you don't know then it is probably best not to educate me. AmandaLouise are you integrated? Do you know someone that is integrated or do you have a deep understanding from your therapist that paints a good picture on what that looks like for your system that you can rely for me question. There is no need to be keenly specific here I'm friendly and certainly not your enemy nor do I care to spar over something like this. |
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#5
Aug 07, 2015, 02:30 PM
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from my above post.... Im integrated, and also from my above post.... what I have described in reference to integration of alters is the natural process. once a person diagnosed with DID is stable and able to handle their problems and life with out dissociation they are able to do all the things the alters jobs, purposes, reasons for being created were, as a result the alters just naturally combine with the person in which they reside (meaning everything they were ..their memories, their emotions, their mannerisms, habits...everything mixes in with that of the person they reside with in which means they are all one whole person again.) putting that in another way.... you dont lose anything you gain everything. all the alters and the person they reside with in become one whole person again. no one is lost, no one dies or no one is left behind. everything and everyone mixes together, becomes one. |
| Gr3tta
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#6
Aug 07, 2015, 04:29 PM
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Actually, I'm scared of integration became my mains are so adverse, I don't know what would happen. I don't think I'm really going to live that much longer anyways. Life's been hard.
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#7
Aug 08, 2015, 12:55 PM
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I had an alter that would act out in harmful to me and other ways, but once I was integrated I was able to control those thoughts and actions on my own just like a normal person can decide whether to harm their self or others. just a heads up there is a grey box at the bottom of the page with all kinds of numbers to call when you are feeling like in your words... I don't think I'm really going to live that much longer anyways. |
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#8
Aug 13, 2015, 10:09 PM
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 Obtw..thanks for the head up on the Gray box. We have a local crisis team number which has been used.
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#9
Aug 14, 2015, 12:59 AM
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#10
Aug 14, 2015, 07:44 AM
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"manage your problems with out using your dissociation skills," This is exactly what is completely unknown to me. I wouldn't even know were to start. I switch for everything depending on the situation. If I didn't switch who would be there to manage? I can not conceptualize this concept in my mind. No beginning. Its like listening to a foreign language. It's empty to me. But I hear it said all the time. Again, if I didn't switch who would manage?
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#11
Aug 14, 2015, 12:40 PM
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at work there was one activity that always caused me to switch\dissociate. Staff meetings. I knew that every time there was a staff meeting I would not remember going to that meeting,But my co workers would be coming up to me and talking about ideas that were thrown around during the staff meeting. one day in therapy my therapist and I talked about how i end up slacking through life on the coat tails of dissociating where staff meetings were concerned. I decided thats it no more dissociating through staff meetings. Its time I took control of my life, stop free loading on the excuse of oh well I always get through it so no biggie. I felt it was time that I not have this chunk of time where I had no idea what had happened. I mean it would be real nice to be able to know what my co workers were talking about rather than faking it and piecing together information on the fly. Like my therapist and I discussed...Imagine getting rid of that chaos in my life.. Yes I was willing to give this a try. When a staff meeting was scheduled I wrote it on my desk calendar. Then I wrote up a plan of action. ... I will stay focused I will Breath I will pay attention to what people say to me I will breath I will feel my body parts I will notice at least 8 colors in the room I will write down who is attending the meeting I will notice... the morning of the meeting I will have a nice nutritious well balanced breakfast I will wear clothes that look appropriate for work but comforting too. I will take in with me my favorite coffee creamer to add to the office coffee, this will stimulate my taste buds and help keep me grounded during the meeting. I will... After the meeting... if I have met my goal I will reward myself with .... If I have not met the whole goal of staying grounded during the meeting I will reward myself for making the effort by... If I am unable to remain grounded during at least part of the meeting take notice of why so that I can make a better plan of action for the next meeting. you do this for what ever dissociative problem you want and are ready to take care of and start handling on your own with out using dissociation to get through it. start out small, something you are sure you can be successful with doing then work your way through to the harder issues. as time goes on and with practice you learn how to handle your own problems with out the use of dissociation to get you through them. |
| Gr3tta, unaluna
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#12
Aug 18, 2015, 09:37 AM
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It is a scary process and more so for the alters because they think they are "going away". They will resist it and You will feel as though you're being set back at times. There will be anxiety and depression for certain alters at certain times because they don't really understand what's happening. You'll need to remind them that they played an important part for you and that they have memories and experiences that you want to have for yourself too now. Good and bad. being aware of all traumatic /memories from the gaps throughout my life -- Integration cannot happen if this doesn't happen. You/the self, has to see, hear, experience and finally accept all those things as the self comes forward. Integration happens when the mind of the "dissociated self" is strong enough to handle the truth. It also can't happen until the "self" accepts that she/he is a "survivor" and not a victim anymore and that those things cannot happen again. She/he has the power now. As the integration progresses, various diagnoses will be adjusted. It is likely that the DID diagnosis will be removed, however, you may be left with depresssion for quite some time. The DID will probably become C-PTSD - Complex PTSD for a while. That is, flashbacks, anxiety will exist with a milder form of dissociation at least. It is likely you would experience flashbacks for many more years but you will learn, if you haven't already, how to ground yourself and manage all that. The closer you get to being fully integrated, the easier it will be. I wish you all the best. Be good and kind to YOURSELF and your alters. |
| amandalouise, Ellahmae
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#13
Aug 18, 2015, 12:33 PM
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many of my alters integrated before I aware of the traumatic memories that were associated with those alters. I only gained back the memory of those traumas .....After.....integration.. it was only ...After ....integration that I was able to work on those traumatic memories.... there is a condition with DID called Co consciousness. that is the ability to know what the alters know, know the alters exist, hear the alters, feel the alters... many people with DID do not have co consciousness. one of the symptoms and diagnostics with DID is having memory problems around traumatic events (some locations call this dissociative amnesia, memory gaps, time loss...there are many names for this...) if someone who is DID has little to no co consciousness then they do not know those trauma's that are stored with in the alters memories usually but not always until that alter has integrated or the alter itself has healed and has chosen to share that memory.. in cases of little to no co consciousness working with the alters on those traumatic memories (ie establishing communication sharing/remembering traumas, working on those trauma's) is not always possible. so instead the treatment focuses in what is called natural integration. ...which is teaching the one who is most aware (alter or body person) to become more able to handle their problems with out the use of dissociation. As the alter or body person takes over each alters job, purpose reason for being (whether they realize that alter exists or not, whether or not they can feel the alter, whether or not they know those trauma's the alters know) the alters naturally integrate become one with the body person or the alter most in control. once that happens even if the alters have merged with one main alter the whole system in no longer diagnosed DID due to the diagnostics require two or more alters, integration of DID type alters is not like in the movies where you see the body person reacting in great pain. its just like a normal person remembers memories, and such. your location and treatment providers may go according to what you posted but mine and the treatment providers around here do not. here in my location DID does not become or morph into another mental disorder. I know many people who have undergone integration and once that was done they were no longer diagnosed with any mental disorders at all. the integration of all alters made them more stable more healthy, less disordered and no longer mentally disordered. I do have mental disorders even after integration but its not because my DID changed into other mental disorders, in fact all the mental disorders I used to have are now cleared up so that I now only have less than a handful of diagnosis, most of my problems are now due to things like work related PTSD, Bipolar disorder (which I already had since childhood) Multiple Sclerosis (something I was born with and presents itself in adulthood) Seasonal depression (which i had since a child and before integration) before I was integrated I was listed as PTSD from sexual abuse, panic anxiety disorder, schizo affective, psychosis, seasonal depressive, Major depressive disorder, selective mutism, borderline personality disorder, advoidant personality disorder,learning disordered, ..... in short all these were cleared up simply buy canceling out each other for example one alter would be diagnosed advoidant personality disordered but once that one integrated with an alter who was actually very social and outgoing and promiscuous that evened out both of them to be normal non dissociative disordered other than being alters, then they merged with me so that made them no longer alters (no longer DID, and no longer Advoident personality disordered, no longer so socially acting out in promiscuous ways) what Im saying is my integration and all others that I know that integrated did not involve all that you posted simply because it was not possible due to my not having a great amount of co consciousness and not having access to those trauma memories associated with the alters. i and all those I know that went through integration it was more natural and not painful. |
| Ellahmae
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#14
Aug 18, 2015, 03:07 PM
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Everyone's DID is different. I know T is working on gaining more co-conscious since I have some presently and integration and if the traumatic memories come, they come if they don't they don't. Our plan is to get everyone (including me the host) to work together, communicate, and cooperate.
__________________
**the curiosity can kill the soul but leave the pain and every ounce of innocence is left inside her brain**
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| amandalouise
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#15
Aug 18, 2015, 04:58 PM
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I can't see myself being integrated being for the prolonged years (18) of trauma and abuse, but operating more in co-operation like we are now. I'm co-con enough to know that there are others and that we can talk, but it has to be directly. Every now and then we get a shout out from the background, but there is no background crowd noise. Of course, we're still plagued with missing memories every day.
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| amandalouise, Ellahmae
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#16
Aug 20, 2015, 12:50 PM
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| Ellahmae
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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