I need some advice in what is happening with me, I dont have alters as far as I no, But I do other strange things, I have done so many things that I dont remember doing, People will tell me things I have done and I have no memory of these things at all, I have thrown away so many things and I never new I was doing it, I have thrown away brand new things I just bought at the store, I have thrown away sentimental things, I dont know when I am doing it or why I am doing it, I have Cptsd and I was suppose to be a trauma program but when I start talking about my past I get actual physical pain in my head and I want to run out of the room to get some fresh air, I have had abuse and abandonment issues since the day I was born, And so much abuse in my life from childhood to adulthood, I have layer upon layer of things that gave happened to me like a cake they said, I have had to be a survivour

are you seeing anyone about this (therapist etc)

do you know absolutely you don't have alters?

alters can be responsible for some of the stuff you've described (throwing stuff away etc)

i know when my alters do something, i often don't have any memory of it

do understand that i'm not saying hey.. you have alters!. i'm just saying that it is likely

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by Wolfeyes1

I need some advice in what is happening with me, I dont have alters as far as I no, But I do other strange things, I have done so many things that I dont remember doing, People will tell me things I have done and I have no memory of these things at all, I have thrown away so many things and I never new I was doing it, I have thrown away brand new things I just bought at the store, I have thrown away sentimental things, I dont know when I am doing it or why I am doing it, I have Cptsd and I was suppose to be a trauma program but when I start talking about my past I get actual physical pain in my head and I want to run out of the room to get some fresh air, I have had abuse and abandonment issues since the day I was born, And so much abuse in my life from childhood to adulthood, I have layer upon layer of things that gave happened to me like a cake they said, I have had to be a survivour

in general forgetting doing things happens with just about every normal, physical and mental health problem. its not exclusive to dissociating.

in regards to dissociation this kind of forgetfulness is a very special kind.

for example even normal people sometimes forget they have thrown things away, did things they do not remember.

dissociation here in america ....in general doesnt cause a person to get a pain in their head and want to make them run out of a room to get fresh air.

here in american physical pain in the head is a physical health problem. for some its called getting a headache, for others its called having a migraine physical problems like a pain in the head actually will rule out having dissociation here in america.

here in America needing to run out of a room to get fresh air for some is a breathing problem for others its called anxiety or panic attack. which again will knock out being diagnosed dissociation...

so what is .....dissociation.... here in america? its a completely normal reaction to a trigger. you know how if someone says something you dont like that will make you feel angry? well someone saying something you dont like is called a trigger and feeling angry is the reaction to that.

with dissociation something happens to make a person feel numb, spaced out, like they are disconnected from their self or others...

example if I get stressed out at work (the trigger) I will ....feel... numb (another word for this is ...feeling emotionless, no panic, no anger , no happiness no emotions at all not even needing to run out of a room) , I will feel spaced out foggy minded its like not being able to think about anything the thoughts just are not there, kind of like when you take medication and it makes you feel kind of foggy)

these are all normal dissociation examples. from there what makes them a disorder here in america is how severe and whether having these symptoms affects a persons life.. you see dissociation to a disorder level affects a persons whole life not just whether they are throwing something away, or discussing something traumatic. it happens in their social life, their work life, their school life, their home life,...

example one of the triggers that cause me to feel dissociative to the extreme of a disorder not normal is storms. for as far back in my childhood as I and my family can remember every time there was a major storm happening I would dissociate. the storms were\ are the trigger and the feeling numb, spaced out, disconnected was\is my reaction to the storms. it didnt\doesnt matter if i was at home, at school out with friends at a party if a storm happens I start having my dissociation symptoms of feeling numb, spaced out and disconnected. even more so after hurricane sandy.

in general a person does not have to be abused or a survivor to have dissociation problems. that said here in my location there is one dissociative disorder that my locations demographics\ statistics show that all reported cases of DID (the most severe dissociative disorder) happens when a very young child under the age of 5 has undergone extreme trauma. you can find out what your location's statistics and what your locations mental health beliefs on this are by contacting a mental health agency in your location or visiting your local library and asking to see your locations mental health statistics\ census reports.

suggestions...well there are many things I would do ....if what you posted was happening to me....

my first thing would be to contact a mental health treatment provider for updated diagnostics. you see the diagnostic label CPTSD has been discontinued here in america back in 2013. we now have new mental disorder labels that are more individualized and better options for treatment to go along with those new mental disorder names. many PTSD category mental disorders now do include having dissociative symptoms, and sometimes medications can help.

for example my CPTSD mental disorder label is now called Acute Stress Disorder and it includes my having dissociation symptoms due to natural disaster called hurricane sandy.

other people i know with a past diagnosis of CPTSD, that mental disorder label in them is now called PTSD, with others its called reactive attachment disorder, with others its called depersonalization disorder....

my point first thing I would do if what you posted was happening to me is get updated assessment for mental health problems.

the second thing I would do is contact my primary care physician. headaches or in your words a pain in the head is a physical health problem that can be taken care of most times with medication. like tylenol, asprin, or migraine medication unless its a more severe physical health problem that may need more testing done.

the next thing I would do if this was me was check with a psychiatrist about the panic attacks or what ever this urge to run out of the room to get fresh air is. when I had this problem an anti depressant \ anti anxiety medication helped to solve this problem. I no longer had this problem after about 4 weeks on the medication and continuing to take it as prescribed.

my last suggestion is ifyour treatment providers think being in the trauma class will help you maybe contacting them and letting them know what reactions you are having to it are, they can help you with either medication or other anxiety coping tools that will enable you to attend your trauma classes and maybe this will help you to feel better soon.

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

are you seeing anyone about this (therapist etc)

do you know absolutely you don't have alters?

alters can be responsible for some of the stuff you've described (throwing stuff away etc)

i know when my alters do something, i often don't have any memory of it

do understand that i'm not saying hey.. you have alters!. i'm just saying that it is likely

Thank you for telling me these things, I never knew any of the information you shared with me, I am not seeing a therapist at the moment, I know I have to get back into therapy, I started to see one but I only seen her a couple of times, I thought alters were like having complete different personalities, But maybe I am wrong, I watched the movie sybil and she had different names with hers, Forgive me for being naive and uneducated when it comes to this, Because I honestly dont know, I also cant find a decent therapist, But I havent given this new one a chance yet, The mental health system has not been very good to me

Hi wolfeyes....

.....I'm sorry that you have experienced and are experiencing such struggles in your life- I can identify with the abuse from childhood to adulthood....both public and private....sorry.

Sybil was a well known publicised case, but for the most part, DID suffers are hard to detect and may take years to diagnose. Other Specified Dissociative Disorder (OSDD) have alter states also.

Not all alters have names....we tried real hard to be stealthy and unnoticeable that we didn't individualize till of late.

Sometimes things disappear right in front of me, things get done, time jumps, and sometimes I question the things that I did, like "wha?" But thats me....everyones different.

Finding a decent therapist is like finding a used car. You keep test driving til you hit the ride that you are happy with.

I hope that this one works out for you.

[amandalouise]

I just went back and read your past posts. they say you have bipolar disorder, CPTSD, diabetes and psychosis back and other body parts pain and you are taking medications for all of these things.....

based on this that tells me that your treatment providers have you on some medications. medications for mental disorders can cause a person to do the things you have posted in this thread.

my suggestion is contact your treatment provider that is over seeing your medications. they can adjust your medications if needed to where you wont feel dissociative and wont still have as much of your pain, and control your panic\anxiety that comes with having bipolar, diabetes...

I also saw in past posts you may have been trying to diet, limit your intake of carbs and other stuff... one thing about diabetes is that when attempting to diet and not following the right eating habits can also cause a diabetic person to forget things and do and have the symptoms you posted about

with all this information I am even more sure that you need to contact your treatment providers and that they will know how to fix it so that you wont be having these problems, in fact given all this information they are the only ones that can tell you what the problem is and what is the best way for you to get to feeling better. there are just so many different elements here that point to this problem could very well be a problem associated to your other health issues and medications.

[Fuzzybear]

I wish I didnt even post this thread, I do drift off and have out of body experiences, My head hurts not from a headache, lt is not a headache, It is a pain that I get in my head when I am talking about my past and when I leave it goes away, My family has seen me when I have this happen, This happened before my diabetes before all my meds, I should not have to explain myself any more, People who think I dont have this dont know me or what I have been threw, I joined this group to get help and help others, But I feel like I am getting judged and persecuted

[elevatedsoul]

i cant talk about my stuff either...

everyone experiences things in a personal way..

i have a lot of strange things happen as well..

most of us are not here to judge or persecute anyone, i for sure not

stuff is difficult enough trying to deal with alone when you dunno whats happening - to have to worry about others making you doubt everything and feel like that as well as so much inside confusing us..

i have a lot of physical manifestations of mental symptoms.. psychologist said that its because i get mentally over whelmed and instead of driving me further into insanity things manifest as pains and stuff..

talking about things sucks though, just have to try to take it slow..

[L.P.]

Hi. Ok im just a kid in my system but you know what? I know some of my other ones they get a pain in one spot in theyr heads sometimes when other ones like me start bein close to the front. I usta make one of em feel what she say was a little marble in one spot in her brain. The same spot every time. I felt like a brain marble to her. Im not the only brain marble in my head. We got a few of em who feel the brain marble to. I sure dont know how come that is but it is. I believe you about headaches that aint heaches. I know them things real for real happen.

We goot another one in our system who one time went on a rampage and throw out years worth of our notebooks. That one she threw out almost all our clothes to that one rampage time. Then we got other ones to and i dont even know about who been doin it this time but somebody or somebodys been throwin out our stuff aggain. Thats how come i dont trust havin no notebooks now in my real for real house cuz one of them prolly gonna throw it out on me one day. Lots of our stuff go poof gone and we sure cant say where it go to. We joke and say it was fairys. We know its not fairys. Lulz. Its us.

Im sorry you had to live rough stuff but im glad you tryin to figure it out. People tell me thats big and important and brave to and you are doin big important stuff and bein brave.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by Wolfeyes1

I wish I didnt even post this thread, I do drift off and have out of body experiences, My head hurts not from a headache, lt is not a headache, It is a pain that I get in my head when I am talking about my past and when I leave it goes away, My family has seen me when I have this happen, This happened before my diabetes before all my meds, I should not have to explain myself any more, People who think I dont have this dont know me or what I have been threw, I joined this group to get help and help others, But I feel like I am getting judged and persecuted

Im sorry my post upset you. I saw in your post you were asking for advice on whats wrong with you. we can not diagnose each others problems but we can give information on what treatment providers call things and how they would go about ruling in or out things.

we are also allowed to tell members if we have the same problems, what our own treatment providers say and do on the topic and what we would do if we were in the same situation.

so my post was a general post on giving you information on what the word dissociation means and is here in america and what I would do if this problem was happening to me.

my post was not trying to diagnose or judge and persecute you. it was giving you information so that ....you .... can decide for yourself what is going on inside of you rather than us telling you what is going on inside of you.