[shame]

I was officially diagnosed with Dissociative Amnesia yesterday by my pdoc - in asking her how it is treated she said deeper therapy ..
what does this mean? Scared of what that means - anyone out there know aboout this?

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by shame

I was officially diagnosed with Dissociative Amnesia yesterday by my pdoc - in asking her how it is treated she said deeper therapy ..
what does this mean? Scared of what that means - anyone out there know aboout this?

when my therapist said it like that she meant that it was gonig to take a long time of slowing working our way through the surface of what I already remember and on down deeper into uncovering the repressed memories that I could not remember. It took many years and it took alot of co-operation on my part of being willing to do anything that my therapist suggested in ways that would help those repressed memories to come to the surface where I could work them out without dissociating.

[Elysium]

Hey there!!

Sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I'm sure it's scary for you to learn about and experience.

What it sounds like your T is saying is that you and her will work towards taking your therapy to a deeper level. Exploring more of your childhood and life experiences and/or traumas and really working to explore your internal world so that you may find clues to where this dissociative amnesia is coming from. Your therapy will most likely become more emotionally intimate and you and her will need to work on building trust with one another to do this.

It could be quite uncomfortable. But T should take it slow.

Hope this helps.

[shame]

Thanks for your reply~ your answer makes sense .. not that i want to recall any of that .. scares me. but then so do the long blackouts of time.

[Miri]

Just sending you courage as you begin to move away the cobwebs in your mind... it is a worthwhile journey.

[shame]

Thanks going to need courage.. this is a deeper level of therapy i am about to go through and concerned about the intensity.
the unknow i guess.

[Elysium]

Originally Posted by shame

Thanks going to need courage.. this is a deeper level of therapy i am about to go through and concerned about the intensity.
the unknow i guess.

It will get more intense and could become difficult at times. The important thing to do is communicate with T. If it is all beginning to get too intense for you, it is okay to ask to slow down and back off a bit for a session or two. T should be well aware of this. Most likely T will encourage you to explore the painful stuff and may even push you a bit, BUT T should also be able to notice when she needs to slow things down.

It is really tough to go through. Just try to remember, you already lived through it and survived. Now you are just re-visiting to tie up the emotional and psychological loose ends.

We'll be here for you!! (if okay)

[shame]

Thanks - just concerned what this will tap into .. there are memories that we can recall that are difficult but numb when revisiting those memories .. could not imagine deeper things for the first time ..
many positive things are gone from my memory or maybe they are just not there .. seems much is lost somewhere.
wondering why when getting triggered can go sometimes weeks and act normal to others and when i come back or asked to recall that week or day there is just nothing.. it is oblivious to me.

[sunsetsunrise]

hi
I am kinda new here. But I guess its okay to say this. When I went to college I was sitting with a bunch of kids my age. They were talking about the past. What????? people are supposed to remember past? How could that be?? I thought the past was not remembered. whats going on here.

I set out to figure this out. It took years. But what I finally understood is that often it was not amnesia at all. It was dissociation. I was not there. I was off someplace. My pension for leaving was well honed at a very early age. My body, and enough of my soul self to keep it alive, would remain..... while the rest of me would be off to places unknown.

Finally 10 years later, after much awareness that had been focused on the subject, I was standing in the kitchen with my roomate walking away. I went into the livingroom where she had gone. I asked her if she had been trying to talk to me. She said yes. And it scared her.

You see, no one was home to answer her. I had left. But this time i came back in time to actually realize that someone had been trying to get through to me. So yes, I do believe that I have amnesia. But not all of it was that. Some of it was that i wasnt there.

17 years ago, I went to a shaman who does soul retrievals. After the second soul retrieval, she told me that my soul would have to be pieced back together. I said you look as if that info is strange to you. She said, yes, she had never been told that before. And so I worked with her over a period of 3 years doing soul retrievals for all the parts of me that fragmented. The parts that could be brought back were. They were always healed by her guide and her before being brought back.

Still that alone has not solved things. It takes other work also. All I guess I wanted to say is that some of what looked like amnesia for me was that i was simply not there. Even though my body was. The lights were on but really I was not home.

I live in great pain and hope to be able to heal some of it by coming to these forums. Blessings.

[shame]

That is quite a experience!
Thank you for sharing that with me.. i am the same here but not ..
it is so confusing and frustrating to being this way.
i try very hard to stay home and away from ppl much less talk on the phone because i never know who will come out and then completely do not remember..but also there are weeks- important weeks that i loose all together ..and really not sure how much more time i loose..until i am back.
going deeper into therapy i cant imagine what that will be like.. afraid the switch will occur and one will come out and talk and iwont know.. scaresme.

[DLHsSystm]

Shame, first Hi nice to meet you. I see we have similar ideas about an avatar. I thought this one was beautiful and a little sad at the same time. What I feel my soul looks like. The soul MY system has protected all these years.
What the person above me described is so spot on for me. My T has never labeled ANYTHING about us except that our primary dx in her opinion is D.I.D., sometimes I get angry at her because I just want to KNOW whats going on with me. Other times as we explore the past and present - I am glad that is what we do with no names attached.

May your journey be healing.
Deb et al.

[sunsetsunrise]

Shame, I can understand your fear around losing time and not knowing what went on when you wernt out (even though whomever is out could be very safe and a good helper)

But with therapy, maybe its okay. If you have a T who really knows how to help people who live as DID. Then maybe whoever comes out can get some help and healing. If you know what i mean. After all, most people inside probably need therapy too. If you feel like you need to talk to the T more than you do, because others are coming out, perhaps you can talk to your T about increasing the amount of time you all spend with her?? Just a thought. Sending blessings to you all