[JungleAnimal]

Hi-
I've had an ED almost my entire life and feel that I am in some sort of remission now, but people are starting to tell me that I look better, which = FAT.. I'm feeling really triggered lately (want to go back to my lowest weight). It doesn't feel like anything good came out of whatever kind of recovery I've been in over the past year, so I don't see the point of plugging on...

[darkrunner]

Hello JungleAnimal
It sounds like your perception of yourself may be distorted....

I'm sorry you are struggling...I'm not recovering (yet) but I imagine it must be really hard to have to gain weight back. Have you been talking to your doctor or therapist about how triggered you are feeling?

Try to hold on....think about all the hard work and progress you've made in recovery. Don't give up...I'm sure it will get easier eventually and things will get better for you.
And keep posting if it helps.
take care,
ktgirl

[insecurity]

Hi JungleAnimal,

Congrats on your first steps towards recovery I too am in recovery from an ED. I was anorexic but have been in recovery for about 16 months. It can be difficult at times. I regained over 65 lbs when I went into recovery. It was sooooo hard. In the end however I realized that I am healthier this way then at my lowest weight. My husbnd also thinks I look much better. The longer you can maintain recovery the better it gets.

I occasionally return to old behaviours but quickly recognize them and correct them. Everydsy is a challenge but you need to take it one day at a time. I have to remind myself daily that I am healthier the way I am now. I know I have a distorted body image that makes this very difficult and I too think I am fat. However others don't see it that way. Taking life one day at a time instead of in larger chaunks of time makes it much easier to handle.

Take care.

insecurity