I'm so depressed I want to die, but I'm so indepted I want to live and let love?

The tittle pretty much sums it
It's just one bad day after another after another and I really
Think that I want to die, but there's so much going for me I want to live.
Every one in my life won't believe me, but....
I feel so lost in the world...
Perhaps this could be my note.
😔👎☔️

((( Thefallen97 ))) In my experience it is not about wanting to die but more about needing a solution and some respite from the emotional pain. Hold on to the positives and know that you can get through this patch. If you feel you really are at the end of your tether, please call a crisis line... Common Hotline Phone Numbers | Psych Central

Something you might find helpful is to read this >>>> Suicide Helpline and http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

Thefallen97, Hello and I can hear your pain loud and clear. I believe that you are in some really deep anguish. I suffer with depression as well. I have been in some really bad lows. I have learned that depression has it's valleys but it also has it's peaks because our thoughts and feelings are constantly changing. Right now you are in a dark valley but if you are able to wait it out, your feelings will change and you will be in a better frame of mind. Like Pegasus said, it is a patch. It is just a period of time. Hold on and remember that better days are coming. Your depression is talking not the real you. You are not your depression. You are a worthy human being who deserves to be heard and also be helped. So please use that hotline if you need to and be safe. Blessings. You can PM me if you like.

i also have depression, it is awful. i am on meds too fr schitzohrenia, and bipolar. they do help and keep me stable and take the edge of depression off. i still get depressed but it's not as bad.did you say you see a doc and t? that could help too.

im not sure what to make of it at the moment... im just going to go hour by hour for now...
sigh :/

Hello, Thefallen97. Please hang on. I feel your pain. I too believe that you will overcome what plagues you now. Having a deep, troubling low is so difficult to internally process sometimes. My thoughts are with you. Please keep reaching out to the forum or a hotline should need be. Be strong, Thefallen97. <3

Welcome to Psych Central. Sorry to hear you are suffering. My heart is sad for all you are going through.

I understand the feeling of wanting to die, but I also find that there is a stronger feeling deep inside to want to live. It isn't easy to find but it is there. The story that deeply moved me is that of a man who was severely depressed and decide he would jump off the bridge. The second he jumped he knew he had made the biggest mistake of his life. He ended up in the water with multiple fractures. He would have drowned without the help of a sealion that kept swimming under him and keeping him afloat and a passerby that phoned the coast guard. Here is the whole story. Suicide-Proofing The Golden Gate Bridge | Here & Now

You are not alone. There are many caring and compassionate people here. Feel free to private message me or any community liason by left clicking on their name underlined in blue to the left of the post and selecting Send a private message to .....[their name]

Hello Thefallen97,
Hang on and don't give in to the stories and lies depression makes up, I too have those dark days, but I keep hanging in there.
I sincerely hope it quickly passes.
Take care, and
Please keep reaching out to the forum or a hotline should need be.

I feel your pain

watch a Movie a comedy that helps me forget about crap at least for 2 hours ... it helps me and may help you too!

You probably are bipolar, which would explain why you have such conflicted feelings.

(((Thefallen))) I've been where you're headed and I promise you, there is nothing there but more pain. Get yourself help. You don't have to continue on this downward spiral. Never make a major decision based on feelings, moods or emotions. They trick you. You are thinking with your depressed mind and the healthy part of your mind is saying get us help. Please go to the hospital, doctor or therapist. You are your own best advocate. Fight for you!!! There is light on the other side of this. I'm telling you from personal experience. That's why your here at Psych Central right? To get help? Let us help guide you through this. Medical care from a professional is needed right now, as soon as possible.

Wow!

You sound very down , I have never experienced what you have felt . I have travelled a bit and seen starvation and misery in the world and that opened up my eyes.

What you must be feeling sounds terrible , I really hope you give it a few days , usually this feeling goes away. You must be strong . Hope you can find a friend to speak to .

People always say thier is always something new around the corner, which is true , life is like a book we have interesting tales .

Please stay well and I know you will have another good experience to tell.

I would suggest seeking professional help, but in the mean time I would consider providing a list of your strengths and goals that you have. This will help you outline your quality of life and then you can strengthen those daily.

Hell thefallen97
I can completely relate to your situation. I was in your shoes once. Actually not once bet several times the past 10 months. Please stay strong and seek medical help ASAP. Things will change to the better. We feel you, we support you, we pray for you.

DX: Major Depressive Disorder, Panic Attacks & Anxiety
MX: Pristiq 50mg - Wellbutrin XL 150mg

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