Hang in there. It gets better.

Do you believe people when they say this?

When I'm clinically depressed a statement like that just pisses me off and makes it worse sometimes. Sometimes when depressed and if said by the right person at the right time it helps. Currently I would agree with the statement and say it gives me a little hope. How does it make you feel?

Let's face it...sometimes people are just talking out their butts and have no idea if it actual will get better...but they mean well and intentions are important to me.

I hate when people say this unless they really truly believe it.

On the other hand a psycho in my life who I have since gotten rid of said to me, "Why do you keep trying? You're situation is hopeless," and that deeply affected me and hurt me like someone took a knife to my heart.

Hmm. So, maybe it is better to say "It gets better," unless the person has terminal cancer and is days away from death. Then it would be a cruel thing to say.

That was a horrible thing to say but very common for a psychopath unfortunately. I've had a few in my life too and it's horribly scary!!!!! My heart goes out to you and I sure hope you don't talk to this butt wipe anymore?

No, you know how psychopaths are. Sore losers. So when he knew I wanted him gone for good he said this, and, you know, psychos are so amazing in their ability to hurt, because that was probably the worst thing anyone could ever say to me. It still haunts me.

The good news is I am 100% certain this is the last psycho I will ever have infiltrate my life. So that is good news.

Maybe "Hang in there, it gets better," is a perfectly fine thing to say. My best friend always says that and she has known me longer than most anyone.

He hit that button on purpose. He knew exactly how it would effect you personally....he counted on it. (((Hugs)))

I really used to wonder, "How do psychos do that?" I still don't know but the good news is I don't care anymore. Yes, he knew the main button was to tell me it was hopeless, stop trying. ----- Because my personal philosophy is that we can still can make progress all the way up to our last breath. One of my personal heroes is a man named Fauja Singh who ran his first marathon at age 89 years, and who continued his running career up until he was 102! He is now 105!

My greatest fear is being stuck, not making progress...and well, I guess that freaking psycho knew that.

He did....you can bank on it. They often have a much higher intellect than people give them credit for. Even their social IQ is high in some respects. The successful ones are usually BRILLIANT which makes them all the more terrifying. The common criminal psychopaths, ones who have been caught haven't figured out how to make it in society without getting caught. They might be denser or perhaps they are still honing their craft.

Hmmm. I have thought about this. Consider this. These psychos find vulnerable people. So how brilliant can they be when they pick on wounded souls? They are like wolves who watch for the wounded stray sheep at the edge of the herd. I can't address this too much due to triggers. I was stalked. Partly the reason I moved to a new neighborhood, into a building that is like a damn fortress. That's why I moved where I am. But now I feel very confined. It was all to get away from a stupid psycho who knew where I lived. But I am free now. I had the same phone number and he was calling me after I moved but then he stopped...I think because he sensed I had changed and wasn't as vulnerable.

I really am getting stronger. It is just taking time.

Hmmm. I used to think psychos were clever. Maybe they are in that they can spot vulnerable people and take advantage. But that isn't being truly intelligent. It is just the predator radar and instinct. This is another reason I am isolated at this time. I was being stalked and no one believed me and the cops said they really couldn't do anything about it. So finally I decided I had to move. It is all getting better. This has all happened fairly recently. Like the past year.

Darn. Yeah, I was vulnerable after my sister died and became a victim. But I resolved it, and now I am better off and I should realize it and stop feeling so depressed. But those psychos kind of leave a bit of a PTSD vibration. I'll shake it off completely, I am sure. The psychiatrist said he thought I was shaking it off because I didn't have nightmares or flashbacks, which is true. I don't. I feel the victorious woman, really. Beat down a vampire...

I was stalked by some lower level IQ psychos many years back. Yes, I believe they choose the vulnerable intentionally in most cases. Then use those vulnerabilities to their advantage. Mine weren't so clever and I got away from them but some people get stalked for life because the psycho knows how to make the victim look crazy. It's not pretty. It doesn't matter how smart we are, a brilliant psycho can have us looking like the mad hatter in no time.

You go girl for getting him out and not letting him bring you down. Take pride in that. You are a survivor and shall remain victorious!

Sometimes we don't know how strong we are until we have no real other choices. You've been pushed to your very brink and are strong enough to stand here today and tell the tale! You are brave in my book.

Thank you so much. You see, NO ONE has validated me for this. I mean you are the FIRST. My family and friends did not help even when I begged for help. They either ignored what was happening or did a blame the victim thing, like it was my fault. Finally, it was getting extremely bad and I realized I would have to take care of the thing myself. And I was dealing with a maniac. I mean someone who was capable of escalating violence. My neighbors were advising me to get a gun! It was a nightmare. I just took a strong stand and he backed off but kept stalking, and he believed I would never move, because I loved where I lived. But I did. I took a stand, then I moved, because I didn't want to just run away. Just talking about it kind of pisses me off because I lost a lot. But I avoided violence. Women should know that if a man is a psycho there may very well be escalating violence. I hired an online counselor who specialized in this kind of thing. Yes, women think crazy crap like they still love the psycho, or that they are the crazy one. I hope others read this thread. Yeah, so thank you because besides this psychiatrist I saw you are the first person to validate my experience. Well, with one other exception. I wrote a poem about getting free and it was published in a book. Unfortunately, the book was in German, but they are hoping for an English translation in the future. (No, I don't speak German.)

You are very welcome. If I told you my story you would probably see how truly I do understand and how truly brave you are for not allowing it to destroy you. (((Hugs)))

Well, obviously you prevailed. So you know about bravery, then. Hmm. I do like you, cyber-friend. ElsaMars

I question my bravery sometimes and other times I feel like a prevailing warrior

I like you too

Well, that's being a wounded warrior, of which there are many in this community. My brother is a veteran and he is the most emotionally brave person I know. He always speaks truth. It is sad he had to go through a war and end up with emotional wounds, but that he is a brave warrior, I have no doubt. So hold both...your vulnerability...and bravery...as two sides of one gold coin.

I'm very sorry to hear about your brother. It truly is a shame how trauma can impact you for the rest of your life. It does change you, but there are ways to grow and learn from all things. Sometimes the most painful things teach us the most. Stay strong my friend.

The last sentence really touched my heart. Thank you for that.

It's comforting, but I don't know if I believe it. My grandma used to say something that seemed more practical to me, "Everything works itself out eventually." It was her way of saying that things will always return back to the middle no matter how good or bad things get. That I can believe and it's gotten me through some really difficult times. Just knowing that, things will always keep on changing (for better or worse) intrigues me enough to stick around.