Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Dec 04, 2018, 07:52 PM
Anonymous57609
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
How do people develop a passion about something? I think having a passion (or at least an interest) would help me go through life, because even although I would have to do things I don't like, at least I would know there would be something I like to do, which would give me some motivation. But having no friends, no family, no partner, no job, and no passion/interests is just a recipe for total despair, which is my state right now.
Hugs from:
eskielover, MickeyCheeky

advertisement
  #2  
Old Dec 04, 2018, 08:01 PM
piggy momma's Avatar
piggy momma piggy momma is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Oct 2018
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,073
Hi Aimless,

Sorry you're feeling this way. I think most of us can relate on some level.

I think passion for something is built over time, experience, and exposure. When I think about things I "do", vs things I'm passionate about...there's definitely a line that was crossed somewhere.

I am passionate about my pig. I love her more than anything. I love being around her. I want to bring her everywhere with me. She is a priority in my life.

As much as I complain, I am passionate about school. I love the learning process, the engagement, and the challenge. It is a priority in my life.

I am also mostly passionate about my job. I work in customer service for an airline and most days, I love what I do and I love engaging with others.

I am a scuba diver. I am not passionate about it. I try to dive several times a year, but I can take it or leave it. It's ok. But there is something missing - something that takes if from "ok" to a passion. I don't know what that something is, but I know it's lacking.

I guess, I would, as a first step, make a list of my interests. And then make a plan on how to grow them to see if they develop into a passion. I'm not sure if that's helpful or not...
Hugs from:
Anonymous40258, MickeyCheeky
Thanks for this!
MickeyCheeky, possum220
  #3  
Old Dec 04, 2018, 09:54 PM
stewartmays1's Avatar
stewartmays1 stewartmays1 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Sep 2015
Location: swindon
Posts: 203
i love music and i try to make tunes on my pc and soon i want to learn a musical instrument if i can.
i sometimes like to google a list of hobbies to give me ideas on other things i might want to do and maybe find a new passion.

when you are depressed and down on life its rough going and hard to find something you care about but dont give up maybe sit down and have a good hard think of something you may like and forse yourself to do that
Hugs from:
MickeyCheeky
Thanks for this!
MickeyCheeky
  #4  
Old Dec 05, 2018, 05:39 AM
MickeyCheeky's Avatar
MickeyCheeky MickeyCheeky is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Jun 2016
Location: Italy
Posts: 11,817
I'm so sorry you're struggling, Aimless Soul I can relate to your struggles. Finding our passion is really not easy. I think the best way is to just expose to as many things as possible, and hopefully you'll be able to find what you really like. Do you see a therapist? I'm so sorry you have to deal with this
  #5  
Old Dec 09, 2018, 08:06 AM
WishfulThinker66's Avatar
WishfulThinker66 WishfulThinker66 is offline
Magnate
 
Member Since: Jun 2018
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,285
I am sorry to hear this is a struggle but you definitely are not alone.

My answer to your question is to give yourself freedom to make a mistake. I developed a love for cooking but only after I stopped worrying about perfect results. I despise my ex for many things but his greatest gift to me was the freedome to make a mistake. I really hold appreciation for this. I have posted elsehwere about my need for success. Ironically, cooking is one example I was able to move beyond this - and I am so very thankful

Are you on your own? I ask because after I left my husband I suddenly was thrown into the position of having a great deal of freedom. Self discovery was but just one result. I found myself with the opportunity to experience things I had previously not been in the position to try and enjoy.

For example, it was only after leaving the confines of a restrictive relationship that I experienced and came to the realisation that my true passion is one for the outdoors.

I am in a new relationship now but it is one based on the recognition of each other's wants, needs, and yes, passions.

So my answer then to finding your own passion is to give yourself freedom - freedome to make a mistake, and freedome to explore and experience what you might not otherwise.
Hugs from:
MickeyCheeky
Thanks for this!
MickeyCheeky, seeker33
  #6  
Old Dec 09, 2018, 03:01 PM
Anonymous57609
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
I am alone, but I feel confined, nonetheless. Confined not by a relationship, but by fear. Growing up, I wasn't allowed to explore the world. I wasn't allowed to play outside even. The only thing that I was forced to do is study for school. Now I am afraid of anything new. I am afraid to fail. But I guess you are right, exploring the world is the only way to find passion. I sometime think to learn a musical instrument, like a guitar. Probably will start with this once I find a job, and be able to pay for the instrument, and for a couple of lessons.
  #7  
Old Dec 09, 2018, 07:58 PM
Mopey's Avatar
Mopey Mopey is offline
Magnate
 
Member Since: Oct 2018
Location: California
Posts: 2,025
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aimless Soul View Post
I am alone, but I feel confined, nonetheless. Confined not by a relationship, but by fear. Growing up, I wasn't allowed to explore the world. I wasn't allowed to play outside even. The only thing that I was forced to do is study for school. Now I am afraid of anything new. I am afraid to fail. But I guess you are right, exploring the world is the only way to find passion. I sometime think to learn a musical instrument, like a guitar. Probably will start with this once I find a job, and be able to pay for the instrument, and for a couple of lessons.
One thing that has helped me is to be ultra-aware of anything that provokes an unusually positive response in me. For example, I love going to plant nurseries and just wandering around. For some reason it just floats my boat. So I've tried to learn more about propagating plants and gardening.
Hugs from:
MickeyCheeky
Thanks for this!
MickeyCheeky, seeker33
  #8  
Old Dec 09, 2018, 08:11 PM
Anonymous40258
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
How do you find your passion?
Hugs from:
MickeyCheeky
Thanks for this!
MickeyCheeky
  #9  
Old Dec 10, 2018, 04:58 AM
Quarter life Quarter life is offline
Elder...and a bit Older
Community Liaison
 
Member Since: Nov 2013
Location: My Own Orbit
Posts: 6,912
I think trying new things leads us to be passionate about certain subjects. Avid reading and keeping abreast of new technologies and trends can also pique our interest. Just be open to new things and something will stick...Just remember there is no rule that you only be passionate about one thing...get involved, get busy marvelling at our wondrous world. The moon belongs to everyone.
__________________
The devil whispered in my ear, "You cannot withstand the storm." I whispered back, "I am ​the storm."
Hugs from:
MickeyCheeky
Thanks for this!
MickeyCheeky
  #10  
Old Dec 10, 2018, 06:52 AM
Anonymous32451
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
I'm passionate about all things disney

I grew up watching the movies, the cartoons, having the collectibles in my house, the songs on the sterrio constantly, etc.

and this has just led me to find out all things about disney

in the process, I came across the disney theme parks which led to a passion for not just disney theme parks, but all theme parks in general so I think exposure does really help.

another example is the tv series benidorm. I loved it, and especially johny vegas's character " the oracle"

which led me to not only adopt the name " the oracle", but watch anything johny vegas has been in like 100 times and constantly wait for new stuff he is in.

if I didn't watch benidorm, I'd have not known about johny

same as if I didn't grow up with disney, I wouldn't have had my love for theme parks
Hugs from:
MickeyCheeky, Mopey
Thanks for this!
MickeyCheeky
  #11  
Old Dec 11, 2018, 04:51 PM
MoxieDoxie's Avatar
MoxieDoxie MoxieDoxie is offline
Magnate
 
Member Since: Jul 2013
Location: United States
Posts: 2,741
I do not have a passion either. I am in awe of people I come across that had a calling on what they wanted to go to college and become. I have been floundering in life going from one job to the next just to earn money not because I have a calling for it. I landed in personal training because well I worked out a lot and I did not need a college degree. Then I figured I could earn more money if I became a massage therapist and that only required me to go to school on the weekends for a year and take a licensing test. No need for brains on any of these. I skirt by. I fake it until I make it.

Still waiting to feel passion for anything, except to stay in the house and hide, to fall upon me.
__________________
When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors.
Hugs from:
avlady, MickeyCheeky, seeker33
Thanks for this!
MickeyCheeky
  #12  
Old Dec 12, 2018, 01:51 AM
seeker33's Avatar
seeker33 seeker33 is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Nov 2017
Location: Europe
Posts: 1,417
I think learning guitar would be fantastic!
I have a similar problem, too. I just don't know what my interests are. It's getting a little better now, but when my T asked me a year ago to learn something new, that was a real challenge! I simply wasn't interested in anything!

One way could be to try to remember things from your past. What you liked as a kid or teen. Even if you weren't allowed to do anything by your parents, did you dream of something?
In the beginning, you can just force yourself to try things. You can't know if you enjoy them before you try. If you don't like it, that's fine, try something else. A great motivation for me is watching YouTube videos where people are passionate about their hobbies! Just watching someone being excited makes me want to try it, too. You can watch anything from cooking, baking, reading, art (lots of drawing and painting tutorials!) exercise, pet care,...
__________________
Complex trauma
Highly sensitive person

I love nature, simplicity and minimalism
Hugs from:
avlady, MickeyCheeky
Thanks for this!
MickeyCheeky
  #13  
Old Dec 19, 2018, 08:22 PM
Gorgias Gorgias is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Dec 2018
Location: california
Posts: 30
Quote:
Originally Posted by Anonymous57609 View Post
I am alone, but I feel confined, nonetheless. Confined not by a relationship, but by fear. Growing up, I wasn't allowed to explore the world. I wasn't allowed to play outside even. The only thing that I was forced to do is study for school. Now I am afraid of anything new. I am afraid to fail. But I guess you are right, exploring the world is the only way to find passion. I sometime think to learn a musical instrument, like a guitar. Probably will start with this once I find a job, and be able to pay for the instrument, and for a couple of lessons.

That's a great question, one that I struggle with and seems to have been unsuccessful in finding. I recently told my adult step daughter (who also struggles with her emotional health and mental well being) that I thought one possible secret to happiness is really knowing what you want in life.

I don't know that anyone has the answer. In the mean time the best we can do is keep trying our best. And if we are not exploring new things then the answer can never be found. I think learning to play an instrument is a great idea. Best of luck to you on the job search. We are all in your corner pulling for you.

Sending you positive waves, peace, love and hugs.
__________________
Some things I do because I want to, most things I do because I have to.

.....You can't blame people for clutching at straws...
for needing some truth in our morals and laws......

Last edited by Gorgias; Dec 19, 2018 at 08:28 PM. Reason: made a mistake, I though I saw something about an interview. I want to remove that part
Hugs from:
avlady, MickeyCheeky
Thanks for this!
MickeyCheeky
  #14  
Old Dec 20, 2018, 05:06 AM
MickeyCheeky's Avatar
MickeyCheeky MickeyCheeky is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Jun 2016
Location: Italy
Posts: 11,817
Sending many hugs to everyone
Hugs from:
avlady
  #15  
Old Dec 20, 2018, 12:11 PM
avlady avlady is offline
Wise Elder
Community Liaison
 
Member Since: Jan 2013
Location: angola ny
Posts: 9,801
I also think learning a musical instrument is a good way to go. Also if you find something you're interested in would be great, like they say you wouldn't have to work a day in your life if you do something you like. good luck!!
  #16  
Old Dec 20, 2018, 04:33 PM
Anonymous52856
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
I think the only way you find your passion is by trying different things. I pole dance and I love it so much. I wouldn't know that if I hadn't stepped out of my comfort zone to go to a class. I am also passionate about reading. Dont ever get me talking game of thrones unless you really like it too. Lol.

Find something that looks interesting, fun, different, etc and give it a shot. Keep doing that until you find what you love.
Hugs from:
avlady
Thanks for this!
seeker33, Travelinglady
  #17  
Old Dec 22, 2018, 11:51 PM
eskielover's Avatar
eskielover eskielover is offline
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Member Since: Oct 2004
Location: Kentucky, USA
Posts: 25,077
I have way too many passions & no time to do them all. I am kind of a jack of all trades & master if none.

I love dressage horse back riding & showin.

I love ballroom dancing & performing

I love painting but only seem to do it when my artsy friends get together weekly / bi-weekly to paint.

I have a real love for my american eskimo dogs. But no longer care to breed ir show them I just want them to be my special family.

I love working on my farm.

I actually enjoy repairing broken things mechanical & around the house. Gives me a sense of accomplishment.

I had a passion for playing my flute & performing but after my professional silver flute was stolen that passion kinda died though I would love to do it again.

I have a passion for caring for animals....well, sick, abuser, wild or otherwise. Love all the wild animals that wander around my farm & woods.

I love to x-country ski or snowshoe much better than downhill skiing.

I loved hiking in my woods with my dogs after a nice snow. They are too old & blind now to do it with me & I lost the one I always took with me. Times change.....but the passion to do it still exists whether I do it or not.

I love doing floral arrangements & seasonal decorating my house.
__________________


Leo's favorite place was in the passenger seat of my truck. We went everywhere together like this.
Leo my soulmate will live in my heart FOREVER Nov 1, 2002 - Dec 16, 2018
Reply
Views: 1979

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:45 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.