[christopherm317]

For those who are keeping up with this ordeal. I went to the funeral and was very unhappy. Some chick was there with a beer in her hand at a funeral. How trashy so I do what I can to encourage and be supportive for my sister. After the funeral some of my family were going to eat. So we asked my sister if she wanted to come. She blew us off and told me she was going to go to a bar with friends. I have done what I could to be nice and helpful. But I'm tired of the cold shoulder. I had my daughters birthday and told my sister to come and celebrate life. She promised to be there. Yeah go figure she never showed up and couldn't even call. I feel sorry for her but I'm not hurting my self to help her. I'm over it. So no more post about her. She's on my nerves for real. Sorry to sound so harsh but dang if you cant help yourself no one will be able to help you either. Right? thanks all for the advice.

[Kathyanita]

sounds like grieving for the loss in death but also mourning the loss of relationship. Its almost like attending 2 funerals only one that does not stay buried so to speak. Im sorry for your losses

i'm sorry.....it rather sounds like the funeral that we had for my brother in law....i do believe that there can be more tension at a funeral than any other "organized ceremonial" gathering...again, i'm so sorry about your birthday party but it sounds as if she might not have enjoyed herself very much...you're probably a teensy bit better off.........xoxo pat

So sorry for your loss. I hope in time your sister will come around, it hurts to reach out to someone and they don't acknowledge it.

You've probably heard this before- but -- each person grieves in their own way and in their own time frame. Maybe she just isn't ready to be around family yet.

When my dad died I was running around doing chores throughout the house, one of my sisters, on the other hand, was just sitting there in a trance-like. She asked me, how I could just go about my life like I'm doing--- I told her that's how I cope-- I can't sit still when I'm upset. She on the other hand, can't get moving.

Your sister may just have her own way of dealing with the loss and perhaps letting her mourn in her own way is the best love you can give to her right now?... just a thought.

wishing you peace,

Mandy

Dang it... I wrote like this mega long response but the internet monster must have eaten it. Ok, long story short. My cousin reacted the same way as your sis when his twin died. He turned on the family and partied HARD with the friends. I think your sis is running from the pain. She's probably not accepted it yet... or maybe she has. Either way it's obvious she's devastated. From the experience with my cousin, the best advise I can offer is to let her do her thing but remind her that you love her and if she needs to talk or a hug or anything, you're there in a flash. Other than that, I wouldn't bother cause it's only hurting you and you need to be able to grieve too.

Ry

[SweetCrusader]

(((((((((((Chris)))))))))))))