[kimthecatlover]

Today is the eighteenth anniversary of my mother's passing away..I still get depressed thinking about it and how I never got to go to the funeral and say goodbye and get real closure...I've been wanting to cry but I'm afraid my roommate will see me and get his own issues (anger which makes him say things like 'I'm gonna stop taking my meds', why does my being sad affect him that way?) going...I also feel anger sometimes because I overheard my boarding home operator telling my sister 'it's better she not get anything of her mother's because it might affect her benefits' when my sister called and told me my mom had passed on..No one had any right to keep me from saying goodbye or having something I could hold onto to remember my mom by..I will never understand why I was treated like I was 'too fragile' to handle those things. It makes me sad that people thought it was best not to let me get closure and just to forget about it and get on with my life!

[gabbie]

That must be very hard for you. I am sorry that you are dealing with this sorrow. Grief is a challenging emotion. It affects us all. Perhaps there is someone there that you could ask for some time away from your room mate to greive.

I do not know what your situation currently is, but I do know there is some truth to the information that if someone who is currently getting assistance from the state or governments suddenly comes into some money, then the state can come in and take these funds to support the care of that person. I am taking care of my Uncle, and when his Mom passed away it was a similar situation. Thankfully we had discussed this together as a family so that everyone was aware that we would need to deal with the situation this way. It sounds like your sister and your counselor were looking out for you. I know it may be hard for you to see.

With those that I have lost I try to remember the good times, because I am sure that once they have passed on they are wishing us only good thoughts and happy memories. This is what I comfort myself with.