Sudden unexpected death of girlfriend

After losing 2 wives to cancer.I finally found a soulmate, We were together 4 1/2 years and she died May 24 of what I found out later was cardiac arrest, She was in good health prior to this,. I now wonder what will I do with my life now? I know too early to make plans but I really feel confused.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm sure you are still in shock. It will take time for you to deal with the grief. Are you in counseling? If not, you might want to seek out a grief counselor.

Thank you. I find the things helping me are talking and spending time with the friends I made through her, They have invited me to dinner and to trips in the future, They are calling me on the phone several times a day, I have also found that hard physical exercise does lift my mood. I realize these are just temporary fixes and I must deal with the grief.

Thank you. I find the things helping me are talking and spending time with the friends I made through her, They have invited me to dinner and to trips in the future, They are calling me on the phone several times a day, I have also found that hard physical exercise does lift my mood. I realize these are just temporary fixes and I must deal with the grief.

Double post. My mistake

hello.

so sorry for your loss.

hugs

Very sorry for your loss Mike, be gentle with you.

Starting first day of new month. Trying to get motivated to get into a routine, Need to pay bills etc. I feel fortunate that most nights I get phone calls from friends that last so long that my cell phone battery dies. Now keep charger nearby. Paying the bills keeps me distracted for a while.

distractions are good.

keep trying to find things to occupy yourself

great you're getting calls from people that care about you, too

Yes. I retrieved more of my stuff from her house. But I still have not put it away, I talking about clothes and stuff. For some reason I am procrastinating about doing it. Really do not know why. For some reason I just put it on the floor. I know eventually I am going to have to put it away

I want to share my thoughts as it helps me and hopefully Help others. So many people have called and texted me.I will meet up with them in a few days. However now by myself. With work slow I find I am having an unusual feeling. I am actually feeling bored. Did not expect this. trying to find things to occupy my time. Going to try volunteer jobs etc.

i just really hope that you can find something.

good luck

Hello. My appetite came back for a bit. Thinking about reading a book, Then maybe cutting the lawn. We are personally responsible for getting out of this boredom feeling. The reason I posted was that maybe someone who has lost someone has the same feeling.

I was having a bad feeling a while ago. Decided to cut the grass. it went away. Maybe this could help someone in a similar situation

Mike, I'm so sorry you're going through this.

I'm 50 and lived with my parents most of my life. My mom died in 2011 and my dad in 2013. I sleep in their bedroom now. I still haven't packed up all of their stuff, so my clothes are stacked on a chair and on a box. I have days when I can get rid of things, but it's slow going.

It sounds like you're doing some positive things. Staying active is good.

I hope you find some peace.

After trying for a while. I have finally landed a volunteer job.It will help to get out of the house and see and meet people. I am trying to everything I can to re start my life.

Another strange feeling I am having is boredom. I lived in my girlfriends house thursday thru Sunday. I was in my house all of Mon Tues Wed. I never had such feelings of boredom before. Exercise does help. Guess that grief is intensifying these feelings. Anyone else experience this?

Is it boredom or being at a loss as to what to do?

Good morning. Good question.I have to think about this, Will post back if I get any insights.

I have found a video on you tube entitled "How to deal with grief. A radically different way"by Noah Elkrief. This finally explained to me the feelings I am experiencing. This video is outstanding. Different views on grief.

first you take a breath - then another - then a step - then another - take it second by second minute by minute - see what comes - I canot believe the sorrow you have been through - you are resiliant though - you know this dont you ....

you wil find what is right for you ....

all i can do is say we are here to listen if you want to talk or rant or ...whatever

all i can do is send hugs

P7

Thank you very much for your remarks.I really deeply appreciate them

I am going to put this feeling here. I am again feeling the need for female companionship. Thinking of going to online dating.

I know that feeling too, but still grieving my deceased wife. However be REAL careful with the online dating. Sites like OkCupid, Pleanty of Fish, Zoosk and the like are just hives of shallowness and soul crushing cruelty.

Match isn't bad but really on line dating is just going to have you message a ton of female profiles you like, with NOBODY responding. Then you get requests from women who... well, to be honest... you wouldn't consider dating in a million years.

So research the sites first before you join. Good please to start is checking out the MGTOW channel on YouTube. They tell the truth of what happens in these sites.

Hi Ripperjack. Thank you for that response. I thought I would be criticized for thinking of doing this so soon.I am a senior so it is to senior sites that I go.