Travis-my son

Hi everyone,
My son, Travis, took own life July 27, 14 years ago. I'm coming up to the anniversary of his death next week. It's been 14 years, and everyone's go on with their lives. I have to to a great extent, but certain dates like next week, holidays, his birthday, are hard. I tried to run from my feelings by joining a few online dating sites. Doing so, for some reason made me sadder, so I canceled them all. With my grief, my bipolar, my sexual abuse issues, and my history of drug and alcohol abuse, I feel like the most messed person in psychcentral. Saturday will be my first day working this week. I've tried to take care of myself. I've worked so many years on myself, sometimes I feel like I don't have a right to still be struggling.

(((((((( dorsey555 ))))))))))
im sorry for your loss. it is very hard to loose someone you love and care about. and grief is just the hang over from all the shock. but you are not alone in any of this. and you are not the most messed up person...we just think that for reassurance. maybe getting in to work will help you be concentrated. i wish you the best.
be strong and take good care of yourself

i still grieve, deeply over someone that i lost in 1975. i understand your feelings. it has affected me a lot, emotionally/mentally, and i try to soldier on........please PM me if you need to........xoxox pat

i'm so sorry about your son.........if you ever need an ear just holler

Thank you everyone for reaching out to me. I feel a little shaky but i did some positive things today and I will make it to work tomorrow. I work in neonatal intensive care, and i'm sure some little baby( and thier parents) will need me, probally not as much as i need them. I cannot express how grateful i am for you folks and psychcentral. I've lived in so much isolation when it comes to my struggles, and now i don't feel so all alone. i just hope that i will be as comforting and supportive to others as you are to me. As a "strong Black woman/nurse/Christian" I'm taught to give and not to recieve. it's so nice to be able to ask for help and to actually get it.
God bless you guys,
Dorsey