[littlemissjess]

I don't have cancer, but my boyfriend's mother does. I'm not sure how long she's had it, but she's getting surgery on the 30th and I don't know too much information on it, except it's in her stomach.

She also has MS (she's not paralized) but she is keeping her cancer a secretive thing, so not many people know, and I don't even know much about it. I'm just really worried because she's a sweet lady and I feel so bad for my boyfriend having to go through this.

Anyone with cancer,any survivors, know or knew anyone with cancer, have any tips or anything that could help me understand things a little bit more?

((((((((((littlemissjess)))))))))))) I'm sorry your bf's Mom has cancer.

[bebop]

jess I am very sorry for you and your bf and his family. cancer is such a horrible thing to go thru. not only for the patient but everyone that cares about them. I lost my mom to cancer almost 14 yrs ago. while alot of cancers now are curable some are not. I think it depends on how soon they caught it and the type. she is going to be going thru some rough treatments probably that will make her very sick. just do all you can for her and let her know you are there for her.

[littlemissjess]

Thank you bebop, I'm also very sorry about the loss of your mother. As I began writing the thank you I saw your Bee there, his mother's nickname is B so I thought that was cute.

But thanks, I've never dealt with anyone with cancer and I don't know much about it at all. I don't know things to say, or how I should react.

[Christina86]

(((((((((((littlemissjess))))))))))))))

I just recently lost my aunt due to cancer. It's not nice

What you mostly want to do is acknowledge the person - the person owns the problem, the problem doesn't "control" the person. Just ignoring it won't work either, but just saying "I'm sorry you're going through so much right now" would help.

I hope her surgery goes well. Hugs and good thoughts to you all.

[(JD)]

(((hugs))) pass them along? I think it would be good to know if it really is in her stomach, or if it's uterine or ovarian cancer... but still bad, imo.

Wishing the best for all... tc

[InACorner]

Cancer runs in my family on both sides...wiped my moms whole family out it isnt really nice....so much suffering ...but what is amazing out of all of it is the joy in their faces and the love of seeing another day...of being able to do the things we take for granted...like my aunt had stomach cancer and she starved to death....everytime food would enter her throat she would throw up...but she always had a hankering for sweet potatoes ...lol and my grandma would make tons of them just for her...and my aunt didnt care...shed put them in her tongue and look like she was in heaven and then let it dissolve alittle and spit it out...lol her tongue probably looked perment orange...its scary for everyone but remember never doubt their strength... because when it comes down to it most cancer patients fight with all they have ...a fight they didnt think existed so strong..its the will to live...my love to you...my warmest wishes and hugs..and all the prayers for the taking for you
love, Inny

[bebop]

jess just tell her she can talk to you whenever she needs to. my mom would not talk to me about her feelings about the cancer. she did talk to cousins about it though and that made me feel really crappy.
if there is housework to be done you could tell her you would be more than happy to take care of it for her. maybe cook her some meals for the family. she needs all her strength to fight this.

[red_rose]

I'm willing to help just e mail me @ wiizard772@gmail.com My mother had cancer

[January]

Jess,

Each cancer fighter, (notice I did not write victim, deals with their illness in their own way. Most people get very tired. You might offer to wash the dishes, wash a load of clothes, fold the laundry or help cook dinner after asking permission first. Some people cling to their routine as their lifesaver, so you want to ask.

I think it's great you want to help. You might even sit down and say, "Is there any housework I can do to help you?" It's a start.

Hugs,

Jan