[fabulousdivararity]

Alright guys, humor me. How did you find out you had NPD? I was reading a book that had a list of the traits in it. It took three months after I got it for me to realize that that sounded a lot like me. I became self-aware and sought out a psychologist to see if I was right. As usual, I was. How did you find out? Comment below.

[shakespeare47]

I just thought I was a normal ambitious guy, until I met with a marriage counselor with my wife. Eventually we started meeting separately. I told him about my childhood, and then said I wondered if there might be some issues I needed to work on, because of my traumatic childhood (I even mentioned that I thought was likely that I had to have some issues, because I experienced so much trauma). And I noticed I was very combative with him at times, and sometimes felt embarrassed by my behavior. He started hinting at BPD and NPD (It was the first time I ever heard of either disorder) traits.... I seem to remember he slyly let me see the diagnosis that had been sent to our insurance company. But, he still never told me he thought I had the disorder, or that he had diagnosed me.

I hated him for that. To me, it sounded like an insult.

[Teacake]

I dont think Its an insult. An NPD/BPD diagnosis means you were traumatised as a kid. You weren't able to do some of the tasks of childhood and growing up. You felt pressured to be the best. You learned to manipulate to get what you needed. You survived your parents game by their rules and won the chance to reproduce. Thats the body's goal. You won. If you choose, you can work on doing the developmental tasks if it would make your life better. If it wouldn't, Its not illegal to have PD. Its not even bad. The Princess of Wales had BPD they say. Everyone loved her. All the great comedians are narcissists. Who else could be on stage so often?

[shakespeare47]

^How did you find out?

[Teacake]

I recognise my own narcissistic injuries. I dont have a personality disorder.

[Walkingaround]

How ? Well, it was brought to me very clearly. Forced to to look at myself in a way. Forced to see mu behavior. However I'm covert. So I am very aware of my faults. And the gap between my faults and what I dream to be is overwelming. Almost too much to handle, so i do mirror people and get upset if they do not mirror picture of me i would like them to mirror. I cant hold relationships and i tend to hurt people. I guess, sometime we all have to take a look at ourselfs. Sometime we even manage to see the truth.

[shakespeare47]

^but did you read about NPD first, and then see it in yourself? Or did you see problems in yourself and they start to try and figure out why, and read about NPD?

When and how did you learn of the topic of NPD?

[shakespeare47]

Originally Posted by Teacake

I recognise my own narcissistic injuries. I dont have a personality disorder.

Where did you come across the term NPD? Did you see problems in yourself first? or read about the disorder first?

[Walkingaround]

Actually I've been aware of NPD for a long long time. Since my mother and 8/9 boyfriends have been NPD.

[Walkingaround]

It just took a complite stop and a brutal truth of my friends and family to regognice that i ,myself am one too.

I peeped over my GP's shoulder while she was reading the latest communication from my Pdoc.

[here today]

Originally Posted by Teacake

I recognise my own narcissistic injuries. I dont have a personality disorder.

How do you do that, recognize your own narcissistic injuries? Did you have therapy to help you with that or did you never lose the ability?

[Teacake]

Originally Posted by here today

How do you do that, recognize your own narcissistic injuries? Did you have therapy to help you with that or did you never lose the ability?

I read Alice millers drama of the Gifted child in the eighties. It spoke to me as it did to so many...I did not find a good therapist until the second decade of this century. She has helped me a lot.

[waiting4]

2nd decade of this century? So, like....in the last 4 years?

I always new something was off with me. I dealt with things just fine for so many years or at least I thought I did. A couple of years ago I was called a narcissist and I studied the definition closely which brought me to NPD. I based on the DSM4 and had basically all the symptoms of the checklist. This brought me to a dark place for sometime. To be a perfectionist in so many ways and then to see that by having this disorder how can I be so perfect or better than all. I also tried to get reactions out of my mother because of all the things she did or should I say did NOT do for me growing up. This only furthered my travels deeper on this road to darkness. At this time I can still feel great and powerful, or nothing, normal or even broken. Finding ourselves is the key to recovery!!! (Still looking)

.

[shakespeare47]

^ who called you a narcissist?

Originally Posted by shakespeare47

^ who called you a narcissist?

My wife after a very interesting night out with her friend and her husband. I also forgot to mention diagnosed professionally as well.