My Intrusive Thoughts (OCD) (Which I will not disclose what they are) are causing me to not be able to deal with people. I can barely watch television , My Movie collection has to be in a certain order and certain movies can touch other movies or I panic. Leaving the house and being in public makes me wanna curl into a ball.
I just got home from being out with a friend and I had a huge panic attack . The thought of even having intrusive thoughts cause me to go over the edge into a break down I took 1 and half xanax today and I still feel on edge. my anxiety is horrible and the past week has been so hard to deal I just wanna stay in a corner of my room and sleep the depression, intrusive thoughts, and anxiety is only getting worse. I am on antidepressants , mood stabilizer, and xanax (anxiety med) and my doctor recently increased my dosage of my antidepressant but my bad days started a day before the dosage was increased.
My therapist ditched 2 appointments set up ahead of time claiming they were never set up. I watched her set them up! Now I have to wait 3 more days but I set it up over a week ago and I checked for cancellations and there are none my last therapist sent me to my current cause my current was suppose to have more time with me , that was crap.
I am so frustrated and hurt ... my family doesn't even know how bad I feel I can smile and two seconds later I realize I am hiding everything I am going through.
I just want to be better to feel better I journal and I take my beds I talk it out and I am not getting better I can't even focus on that OCD book cause my attention spand is shot...

I am so tired of this..

[Bigmike727]

Hi ManicFemale, I am sorry to hear that you're going through such a tough time battling OCD. It's quite a struggle, I know how difficult it is to fight OCD through first-hand experience. What I find helps though is by taking a walk on the beach (well I live in The Bahamas so I have easy access to a beach but you get my point) or just appreciating nature for its beauty. I am on Prozac and that has worked miracles for me though, so that has taken off alot of the burden aswell. Anyways I hope you feel better soon.

Thank you . I do not live near the beach I would love to but don't but I will try to appreciate nature.

[ifst5]

OCD is a long term challenge so be gentle with yourself. There are going to be times when you simply can't cope with much more, i know because the same is true for me. I'm sorry your therapist is being unprofessional. Is there any chance that situation can be changed or improved upon? If you can't tell them outright you weren't happy with their behaviour is there another way you could convey your concerns? Is there perhaps another professional your care can be transferred too? Finding the right therapist can be a case of trial and error but persistence is key so hang in there. Do you feel your meds are helping or is this something that may also need a review? It could well be the case you that you simply need more time to adjust to the higher dosage. But who is meant to be supporting you through that professionally? Maybe an earlier appointment with your regular Psychiatrist would help - after all they're usually at the top of the chain so they might be able to assist with your therapist woes too. I realize this is a lot of (obvious) practical advice but i hope you know that there are plenty of people to support and cheer-lead you here as well. I know it might be hard to even think about being proactive right now but in the long term it usually yields better results. Stay strong

[Psychotics]

I can relate to you manicfemale. In the same boat. Have you ever tried to let the movies touch each other? And enjoy the anxiety that it brings? It requires a lot of courage, even too scary for me. But that's the way it goes.

I had a therapy session today. my Therapist and I worked things out it was a computer issue. I just started new dosage last week so I will have to wait it out and I am feeling better today.

Originally Posted by ifst5

OCD is a long term challenge so be gentle with yourself. There are going to be times when you simply can't cope with much more, i know because the same is true for me. I'm sorry your therapist is being unprofessional. Is there any chance that situation can be changed or improved upon? If you can't tell them outright you weren't happy with their behaviour is there another way you could convey your concerns? Is there perhaps another professional your care can be transferred too? Finding the right therapist can be a case of trial and error but persistence is key so hang in there. Do you feel your meds are helping or is this something that may also need a review? It could well be the case you that you simply need more time to adjust to the higher dosage. But who is meant to be supporting you through that professionally? Maybe an earlier appointment with your regular Psychiatrist would help - after all they're usually at the top of the chain so they might be able to assist with your therapist woes too. I realize this is a lot of (obvious) practical advice but i hope you know that there are plenty of people to support and cheer-lead you here as well. I know it might be hard to even think about being proactive right now but in the long term it usually yields better results. Stay strong

Yeah my therapist told me to do a relaxation exercise while allowing my thoughts to come about and dealing with them calmly for 20 minutes out of my day so my anxiety isn't so bad.

Originally Posted by Psychotics

I can relate to you manicfemale. In the same boat. Have you ever tried to let the movies touch each other? And enjoy the anxiety that it brings? It requires a lot of courage, even too scary for me. But that's the way it goes.

Does your therapist specialize in OCD?

[waggiedog]

Hi there. Just would like to say that I def understand where you are coming from regarding the OCD, intrusive thoughts and obsessive thoughts. I too have these on going all of the time. Lately I've also been having panic attacks which is a dreaded new issue. My mood stabiliser med (well, 2 kinds really) is really making a lot of difference. I tried coming off these meds recently and it was a total disaster, I soon got myself back on them. The meds are Seroquel and Depakote, mood stabilisers and they def really help. I'm doing DBT in a group therapy and also a one to one for DBT/CBT. My diagnosis is borderline personality disorder, but of course anyone can suffer these symptoms without an official diagnosis of mental illness. I wish you all the best and I send you lots of HUGS. xxxxxxxxx

No she doesn't but the only one in my area that does I have had before and he cost too much and didn't work out.

Originally Posted by JosieTheGirl

Does your therapist specialize in OCD?

Thank you. I am working on getting better mood stabilizers

Originally Posted by waggiedog

Hi there. Just would like to say that I def understand where you are coming from regarding the OCD, intrusive thoughts and obsessive thoughts. I too have these on going all of the time. Lately I've also been having panic attacks which is a dreaded new issue. My mood stabiliser med (well, 2 kinds really) is really making a lot of difference. I tried coming off these meds recently and it was a total disaster, I soon got myself back on them. The meds are Seroquel and Depakote, mood stabilisers and they def really help. I'm doing DBT in a group therapy and also a one to one for DBT/CBT. My diagnosis is borderline personality disorder, but of course anyone can suffer these symptoms without an official diagnosis of mental illness. I wish you all the best and I send you lots of HUGS. xxxxxxxxx