[BeaFlower]

In my last thread I wrote that I have the symptoms of OCD, but I'm too scared and embarassed to talk about it with my parents and with a therapist (but expecially with my parents). I didn't talk yet, and I'm thinking if it's worth that I do it.
The fact is that I've already improved a lot alone. I had religious obsessions that caused me much anxiety and made me feel obliged to touch certain objects and to say certain things in my mind (prayers and similar things); now, since I began trying to rexist to these compulsions (more or less one year and a half ago) I still have obsessions, but less often, I'm more able to think that it's not my fault and I can avoid the compulsons most of the time (not always).
My other big problem was the need to do things several times, till I hadn't done them 'perfectly'...for example enter in a room several times, cancel and write a word several times, read again also if I have already understood the meaning. Now, with some 'exercise', I feel less often these needs (but sometimes I still have them) and I'm more able to rexist (exept for reading again...I still do it quite often).
What didn't improve is my need to repeat my prayers since I haven't said them 'perfectly' and some twetches, but I don't know if these are related to OCD.
So, I improved a lot alone, but not completely. I wanted to ask: is it possible that we arrive to the point in which we don't have obsessive thoughts and the need to do compulsions anymore? Or is it possible that I arrived to the maximum point that I can reach and I have to accept the fact that some symptoms will always remain?
I ask it because for me it would be VERY difficult to say these thing in real life (I felt a bit anxious also at the idea to write here, also if I know that you understand me)...I don't want to force myself to do this embarassing thing, to make my parents worry, to make them waste time and money for my therapy and to waste also my time if I can't improve anymore.
I can survive also with the symptoms that I still have...compared to what I had in the past this seems me nothing. But I'd like that I could talk about it...if I have to say the truth, it's expecially because I'd like to have the satisfaction to have won the embarassment and because I want to know 'officially' if I have OCD or not (also if I'm almost sure) and if I can say that I'm recovered or not. But I don't know if it's a good idea to go to see a therapist only for this reason, if therapy can't make me improve.
Sorry if this thread is so long and thanks to who wants to read it.

[Bigmike727]

Hey BeaFlower, I understand how hard it is to first come out about the battles you have faced, I know it was the hardest step for me. I don't regret it though my parents were very understanding about it when I first talked to a doctor about it and have been supportive of me since. I can't say whether it will be helpful for you or not, but I know that my pdoc put me on Prozac when I told him about my OCD, and its worked miracles for me. I too used to have alot of religious obsessions, particularly with blasphemous thoughts. Medications aren't a cure, but atleast for me they have really helped me manage my OCD. Wishing you the best.

[BeaFlower]

Thanks for answering bigmike! I'm happy that therapy have been helpful for you, but I'd prefer not to take meds if possible. I neither know if really want to do a therapy with a psychologist, but if it can help me maybe it's worth doing it...I really don't know . It would be difficult to talk with a therapist, but expecially with my parents. Probably they would be understanding too, but they would be surly very worried, and I don't want...And I don't know if I'd be able to talk aloud about these things...it's so embarassing! I shouldn't be embarassed, I know, but I am. I'm neither able to imagine in my mind to start a conversation about this...I don't know how I could do it. Sometimes I feel almost ready, but it doesn't last long. Expecially I wouldn't want that my dad knows it...I wish that I could say it only to my mum, but it's impossible, she wouldn't agree.
Can I ask how did you talk with your parents for the first time, if you want to say? You can PM me if you want. Thanks again for answering

[Bigmike727]

I know how hard it is to open up about this, believe me I was at that place myself. The way my parents found out was I went to my GP and related to him my issues, he then called my parents and talked to them and related what he thought was happening before recommending a psychiatrist to me. Just remember that people do get through this, it can be overcome, even though it doesn't feel like it at times.

[BeaFlower]

Thanks You're kind. What is a GP? Is it a doctor? I don't always understand abbreviations in english So you talked with a doctor before then with your parents...I don't know...it would be difficult also to see one without making them know. It could be a solution, because I'd feel less embarrassed with a therapist then with my parents, but it would be difficult to 'organize' it. And then I don't want that they remain badly because I didn't want to talk with them. Maybe it would be easier if I didn't care so much about hurting the others...but it's impossible.
Maybe if I still had a lot of compulsions, like before, I would be more 'motivated' to look for help...now sometimes I think 'I can tolerate these symptoms, it's not worth talking about them'...but I'd like to do it. Well, thanks for answering again

[Bigmike727]

GP stands for General Practitioner, your every day doctor. Yeah it was hard for me to organize it to, I just told them that I had been battling some issues and needed help. Thankfully, they give me alot of leeway in running my own life, so I just called and made an appointment. That's good that you feel you can battle it alone, you're stronger than I am. I just eventually reached the point where I couldn't take it any longer and reached out for help. Wishing you the best.

[BeaFlower]

I think that you are stronger then I am, because you talked about it in real life