[cmonbrain]

This is really hard. And i actually don't have POCD (pedophilic - OCD) while working - that much, but in my free time I am stressed and have had several days that just went by in panic/stress/anxiety because of being afraid I was a pedophile. I don't get turned on sexually by kids, but this thought has been haunting me (penetratning thoughts), and visualization has been very grim. I do realize, now that I have read on the internet about this diagnose that it is my brain spooking and that several other people have tried this.. and this really gives me relief - and i tell myself i have POCD rather than being afraid of it. I am not either afraid of approaching kids, but kids are very good at triggering my POCD still.
I have to add that I have been isolated with my work from prior social contacts for a year soon and have had WAY TOO MUCH TIME to think and be a bit down because of a prior girlfriend - I realize getting home to safe harbours with parents and friends helps me hugely and i am soon moving home. But the 2 months i still have to work in this remote place are tough for me.
I try to do a lot of things to keep my mind of stupid thoughts, but it doesn't always help, and working night-shifts is killing me as well as my anxiety seems to come easier when tired.. which i am for a couple of days after every night shift.
Adding to this I have some salivatory problem with the production of too much saliva with i think is correlated to my stress/anxiety - maybe the fight or flight response.. (but that should be the opposite? - dry mouth?)

I know this will get better as some point, but I am getting kind of tired of my anxiety/stress/POCD/salivatory problem.

ahhhhh.. drool..

.. anyone recognize this situation? any other mind games to get out of drooling and anxiousness - not taking medication and will not try btw.. i am a doctor.. i have seen the list of side effects

[Skeezyks]

Hello cmonbrain: Well... I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

I don't know as I have a lot to offer with regard to your concerns. (I noted you're not interested in taking medication. I'm not on any medication either.) I also struggle with intrusive thoughts. I can only write what I have written numerous times before with regard to these kinds of concerns. My experience has been that trying to ignore, block, or stuff down intrusive thoughts simply makes them keep coming back stronger.

So, in an effort to allay my intrusive thoughts, I employ a Buddhist practice called "compassionate abiding". This involves simply allowing the intrusive thought to come forward... breathing into it... perhaps even smiling to it. Sometimes I will even place my hand over my heart as a sign of lovingkindness & compassion for it. After a few breaths, I then drop the "story line" & simply continue to stay with the underlying emotion... be it fear, anxiety, grief or whatever until it fades.

Two things happen when we employ this practice. First, very gradually over time, the strength & frequency of intrusive thoughts wanes. But second, & perhaps more important, is that we learn we can stay with difficult thoughts & emotions without losing our balance... our equanimity.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!

[MusicLover82]

I can relate because I have HOCD where I obsess about my sexuality, too. I find it most helpful just to ignore the thoughts and they have less power over me. I don't even talk about the thoughts. I just tell myself "this is OCD, not me." I hope that helps. I also take Xanax when the anxiety becomes intense. Best wishes that these thoughts will stop plaguing us both soon.