self destructive behavior

so for whatever reason I have real bad blood pressure, it's already caused some complications with my health but it's never really bothered me much.

Still my family keeps harping on me to keep seeing the doctor and to take the medication they give me but the medicine makes my blood feel like slushy mix. I feel better with my blood pressure elevated, and I know it's causing cardio vascular problems and the doctors say I'll be lucky to last a few years without a serious stroke or heart attack but what reason would I want to add years to my life when the way to do it makes me more miserable? Isn't it better to live a short life that you feel fine than a long drawn out one where you don't ever want to do anything?

I've tried different medications, I'm not all that concerned about finding a solution to be honest. I think the sooner it does the damage the better probably. dunno.. not sure if I care enough to do anything about it, i mean should I?

Have you tried other "natural" ways to lower your blood pressure; motifying your salt to potassium ratio, eating less meat and more fruits and vegetables, exercise, weight loss, stress relief, etc.?

Blood pressure and its problems don't have symptoms at all which is why you feel "fine" but you aren't fine; unfortunately the medicines available now do have side effects. It's not "sooner it does the damage" it's doing the damage constantly, now, "doing the damage" as a single event literally means death!

Make it a project and study blood pressure and see if you can lower it with lifestyle modification (that's what I'm doing; my husband takes two or three different meds for his as he doesn't want to do lifestyle changes).

I can understand how you feel - I considered it to be "self-harm by stealth" because I knew I was compromising my health but that seemed like a good thing to me. Maybe this is something you could talk to your doctor about? - why you are reluctant to take medication, and what other options you have.

Lifestyle changes, as Perna suggested, are worth looking at too - I have started walking more regularly and it has done me a lot of good, physically and mentally, so there is less incentive to carry on in self-destruct mode.

Take care

so how bad can bad blood pressure be, mines been running around 220-250 over 150 for a couple weeks now, last time I was at the doctors office like that he didn't believe the readings, he accused me of being on cocaine. and the last time I was in the hospital i was already on blood pressure pills but they also gave me iv blood pressure medicine to bring it down.

Hi Chaosrob

You are a still a young man, and those numbers are dangerously high. I think you should care enough about it to take your medication on a regular basis and talk with your doctor about lifestyle changes that might help you.

Here's one reason you should care. A heart attack HURTS....hurts really bad.

Here's another reason. A really bad heart attack might not kill you....you might even long for the days when your blood felt like slush.

My next door neighbor (in his 40s) was in good health. He was working out at the health club, stopped for a moment to catch his breath, and suffered a massive heart attack. It took a long time for anyone to notice and call 911, and they didn't use a kit on him. By the time he got to the hospital, the surgeons were able to fix his heart - but he was completely comatose due to lack of oxygen to his brain. His body recovered enough, so no plugs needed to be pulled - but his brain never came back. His wife brought him home "as is."

This happened to him during the summer of 2004. He's STILL in a completely vegetative state - can't speak, can't move, can't eat, can't respond to stimulation, can't even see because his eyes keep rolling up into his head. His wife swears he's in there, but who really knows? It's possible he could life like this for another 20 or 30 years.

It's your life, Rob, and it's your heart. Be kind to your heart, even if it makes your blood feel slushy.

good thing I signed a dnr a few years ago, I'd hate to be stuck in a vegetative state, who cares if I had a chance to come back, that's not worth the risk of spending ones life in that condition.

thanks for the concern though

What is YOUR plan, chaosrob?

my plan? just keep going till my body drops I guess, I have no desire to try to prolong my life.

High blood pressure is treatable. In those places that make suicide a crime you are guilty of nonfeasance.