things are better?

Well my house is just about our of foreclosure thanks to my parents. They rescued me again. My husband is still out of the house and I miss him and the boys miss him. Athough there is not the tension there used to be when he was home. I have been working from 7:30 until 6 pm every week night for the last month and it is really starting to wear on me. I am feeling splintered, coming apart at the seams. I am having trouble remembering everything. I think it is a lot to due with the stress. Everyone I talk to says I should not let my husband move back in, but I am still thinking about it. My T does not want me to let him in, but no one understands how hard it is to live without him. Any suggestions??

(((nightowl))) Please listen to your T. Maybe in the future you will be able to "let" him back.. but for some reasons, your T says it isn't in your best interest right now. Why isn't he helping with the bills? The children are still loved by him, shouldn't he be helping, if he means to? Why would allowing him back change your financial situation, if he isn't helping now? Is the house also in his name, yet he doesn't care? If he really understands, why wouldn't he take care of these things for you? If he isn't able, why would he be able if he lived with you? You don't have to answer... just wanted to jog your thinking, if you aren't.

Living "on one's own" is tough. I find it still easier than living with someone who only lived for himself.

(((((((((((((nightowl)))))))))))))))))))
i understand how you feel..it is very hard being alone...my husband has been out for 2 years ..we have tried to go back ..it doesnt seen to work..i am full of confusion myself...i know that when things get ruff ..from a distance everything looks may look good and seem like it could get better and maybe i should try one more time..but then when it is up close..it doesnt look the same...everytime i have tried to go back i have found myself worse off then i was when things were so ruff being alone..if that makes sense..tomrrrow he is due to have surgery..i have always taken care of him..i feel extreme guilt cuz im not...truth is ..i just cant...i have to keep reminding myself you cant go back for the wrong reason..may it be loneliness or guilt....and also why we are apart in the first place....i dont know if this has helped you at all but at least know your not alone and i know myself i understand how you feel......take care of you....sherry

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Sherry and Sky have given you wonderful advice. Please listen to them and listen to your T. I know you're exhausted and discouraged, but you can stand on your own two feet. Please don't give up.

Hugs,

Jan

take care of yourself

*hugs* please be strong, and don't let him come back, it will be better in the long run

((((((((((((((((Hugs4U))))))))))))))))))))

This is a very trying and stressfull time for you and your boys. Stay strong and remember we are here for you.

Thanks for all the support !!! I have not made any decisions yet. Yesterday was a very bad day for me. i can't remember half of the day, which is very scary. and makes me feel stupid. then I get very angry at myself. I hope some of this crap lets up soon so i can think again.

Sorry in advance. I don't know if this is readable.
I am very sad and hurt and crying. My husband called me last night and yelled at me for being stupid and crazy and abusive to him. I never beat him up! I never hurt him on purpose! He said he hates me. I am so sad and low feeling so much hatred for myself! I hurt myself tonight . And last night. and I don't care I can't feel it I can't feel anything i am numb see I am as crazy as he says!!! I hate myself.

No you aren't crazy. That isn't a legitimate term anyway and only "ignorant" ppl use it (and us here when we get really bizarre feeling!) I'm sorry you are in such a dither. Quit listening to your husband, is all I can say, when it comes to talk like this. It's abusive. hang in there please. (((hugs)))

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{nightowl}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
so sorry that your having a hard time .....sending you a


I know your -pain about selfhatred in fact I was going to post how I am fighting self hatred really bad right now and I have also been hurting myself...but like my T told me today....the ones treating us bad are the ones with the problems not us....your not crazy your just in alot of pain right now and for that I am so sorry...wish I could reach through here and hold you tight....your hubby has the problem NOT you...he does not know how to treat you properly and that is all about him and his stuff....NOT you....I totally understand the not feeling...I struggle with that too....being numb is a way fo protecting ourselves...your not crazy for doing that and neither am I ....please take care and do not be so hard on yourself....I am trying to do what I am telling you to do...I know it is hard but lets both try....hang in there

(((((nightowl2)))))) Please know that all of us here at PC are here to listen when you have a problem or simply need to vent. You are NOT crazy, and you mean something to all of us. Life itself can be crazy, but YOU are not CRAZY. You are having a hard time, and I am very sorry to see you have to go through such turmoil and heartache. Please just hang in there and stay strong. I'm thinking of you and praying for you!!
-Jen-