[wisewoman]

ERRRRRRRRRRRRRR, I just want to complain okay? Vent, explain, get validation.

I had to leave my home at 6:30 today to get to an 8:30 meeting. I get to clock the time I leave as it is travel to the meeting. So I go to this meeting and decide that I hadn't had time to get to clients in another town that I usually don't work in so I stopped in there for a two hour flea ridden visit trying to pull magic out of thin air. I have to be very cautious with these people as they like me and have kicked everyone else out. Their daughter who lives there has a hording disorder so imagine the rest. By rights I had planned on leaving work at 2:30 and going swimming but I had several serious paperwork issues to deal with.

I went to my office and really struggled for two hours getting things faxed and copied and filed. My son called to tell me that his girlfriend tripped over the dog gate and had a badly sprained ankle, could I bring home crutches? I leave my office and stop to hand-deliver paperwork. I am on my cell dictating a letter. I stop at the local grocer and tell my adopted daughter who works in the deli that I still love her very much. She says "you sure"? I said no doubt. Been grieving that she has left the family and hates us. I decide I am so exhausted I am just going home and maybe a swim on the way.

I tried to reach the girlfriend, no answer so I felt like I had to get right home to tend to her as she was home alone. But, I pulled over and made phone calls for work and checked my voice mail where I got heck from two different people. I was so mad, I have been so right out straight! and one of the things was my fault, a visit I failed to write in my book.

I left a note this morning for son to vacuum floors and girlfriend to do dishes. NOTHING WAS DONE! I had hubby put up the gates cause son complained about the dogs making messes and jumping on his bed when they were wet and muddy. I find the gate trashed, broken sharp plastic everywhere! I have to vacuum, mop and do dishes.

He is now at work after classes and does not get out until 9:30.

I have been so incredibly angry. He complains about my dogs and the groceries I buy. His girlfriend is swollen and in pain and he won't even allow me to bring her to a nurse friend. He is protective as she has anxiety.

I should not have to do housework when I have three children who are home a heck of a lot more then I. My hubby came home after a 9-5 and was late. My youngest was working and riding with him. They had 20 minutes before play rehersal!

Okay okay, my back hurts and I am in bed now waiting for the blue ice to freeze so the girlfriend can be tended to.

The house is relatively quiet, the animals are fed and I have my a.c. on and a flimsy nightie. i am so hot.

That is my complaint. I am sorry I can't be perfect as it makes me feel scared and vulnerable. I hate being fussed at. I am tired. I want to do well. I want to not be so stressed. I am trying. I am mad at this kid who never is responsible for nothing! It's always someone elses fault.

Hope everyone else had a better day then mine. Is it really over?

You need a vacation!!!!!!!!!!
Can you hire a housecleaner?
(((((((((((Wisewoman))))))))))))))))

[attekus]

That's way more than I could handle. That sounds like a months worth of stuff wrapped up in one day. Amazing the person who can handle all that. You do need a break.

[wisewoman]

Thanks for the support. No, I am too poor to hire someone to clean plus my house needs major cleaning daily.

[dottie]

There is no excuse for your son to resist or refuse to pitch in & help out. You r headed 4 a breakdown if this kinda thing continues. Your Husband needs to back you up 100% on this too. Maybe you could threaten to kill...if things did not change. Come to think of it...this tactic only worked for me..so don't try it.

Get up on a soabox and tell them how things r gonna be from hereon in.

Good luck.

~Dottie

[wisewoman]

Yup, told my son when he called home to check in. He got it I hope but hubby plans on speaking with him later. It's funny because I just take this crap forgranted, part of life. It's clarifying to hear you all. Geez I need to add good things in my life.

[dottie]

Hi, again.Hope things get better. You can only spread yourself so thin....before there is some sort of calamity 4 all involved.

Good luck!!

~Dottie

[(JD)]

((((hugs)))) sigh makes me reconsider the advantage of living alone

[Parker10]

Ummmmm.......if a girlfriend is living in YOUR house with YOUR son, why arent THEY helping everyday with chores, purchasing food etc? How dare they complain about ANYTHING !!! I would certainly put up a sign that the MAID has taken a leave of absence, and if they want to continue to live there, they best learn how to clean, cook, wash dishes and do laundry real fast ! And you my lady, should lay in bed eating BonBons until they GET IT ! Perhaps your son needs to be reminded that its not only his g/f who suffers with anxiety, but that his Mom is suffering with abuse, overwork, and a tough job. Tough Love time before you dont have anything left IN YOU to give !

[wisewoman]

Hmm, Parker, I am listening to hubby and son fight. I yelled down the vent to talk it over with no fighting. Don't we all want to be taken care of? He is starting to get it. hubby is unwell and I can't lift so if he is here I need to be able to count on him for the man stuff. He is confused, trying. Girlfriend is very young and neglected and she will do all I ask. Her ankle is a mess and I am concerned that we should be doing more then ice and ace, elevation. You guys are so good for me as I start to feel less guilty for not being mrs. Cleaver. The stuff with adopted daughter is hard enough. I thank you all. BTW, youngest babe with OCd is going to a prominent OCD treatment facility in Nov. I am excited and frightened.

[Perzephone]

Holy moley, Wisewoman - I'm exhausted just reading your post! I can't imagine having to live it!!!

[wisewoman]

Ha Ha, off to another day. Oh boy

[weather]

And I thought I had problems, Wisewoman. You are a very strong person to carry all of that. Besides helping with the house could your son help with the expenses? I assume he is getting money from somewhere. It wouldn't have to be much, just part of the week's food. I hope you have a better day today.