[Indie'sOK]

Not sure if this belongs here, but here goes...

I'm 17. All my friends have tried or regularly smoke weed. Except me. I've always been the cop's daughter, too afraid to try anything. Maybe that's good. But I'm fighting the urge to try it now. I want to relax, to hang out with my best friend whom I haven't seen in many months (he's my potential "hook-up"). I want my anxiety and my nervous reservations to go away when I'm hanging out with people. I guess I'm not asking you guys if I should smoke or not - I'm asking you to help convince me from doing it in the first place. My grades are great now - I'm so close to getting all Bs. So why would I want to mess that up? I'd talk to my therapist about this strange inner urge when I see her next, but it's as if all she cares about is proving to me that I've got a condition I so very much know I don't. (see here)

I miss her understanding. I need my usual good judgement right now, more than ever. I just crave the feeling of trying something new, something on the rebellious side. I feel like an outcast. Maybe peer pressure has finally gotten to me, I don't know.

[alwaysrejoice]

As i former pothead I advise that you just stay away from it. Nothing good really comes out of it.

[gma45]

Stay away from it! You have good judgement use it! It's ok to be an outcast instead I would say you are a good role model stick with it! I know you can do it!

[gashly]

I used to hang out with people who smoked when I was younger and didn't partake, no one cared or judged me. They just figured more for them.

[Sabrina]

Oh please resist this urge. Drugs destroy. My first marriage was destroyed because of weed which eventually lead to harder drugs. Please please please don't.

[elliemay]

Did you know that some dealers put embalming fluid in marijuana? Yea, embalming fluid.

And that's where you would be getting your marijuana from - a dealer. Who know who all was killed or harmed trying to get this drug to you.

In terms of anxiety, I think marijuana does more harm than good. Yea, there is a temporary relief, but this can be replaced with profound paranoia and freaking out.

If your dad is a cop, then he knows the signs of marijuana use probably way more than the average parent. My guess is that this would be very very hard to hide from him anyway.

If relief is what you are seeking there are other, healthier ways to go about it. You're obviously smart, and prepping yourself for long term success and productivity. I would try to opt for one of these long term, healthy ways to help yourself.

[Sanada]

OK Indie. Here are some facts that may put you off.

I used to smoke weed ( a lot ), when I was in my 20s. My first go on weed was when I was about 22. I was late in trying every thing (I was a virgin till I was 21).
Being a late starter I think saved me.

Stat fact. - In the UK it is now Proven that teenagers who take weed when under the age of 18, develop Psychological problems by the time they are 28. The problems manifest as - Paranoia - Psychotic episodes - Memory loss - and 80% of the time the urge to try other drugs (and that in it self is a whole other can of worms), may follow.

As a teenager you're body is still developing so you dont want to disturb you're 'natural' growth.

If among friends and they offer you some, politely say no. If they try to force you by using words like 'do you wanna hang with us', you still say no, if they persist in trying to get you to try it , then they are 'Not Friends'.

[Sanada]

I would also like to add this story Indie.

I had a lover in 2007. She spent over two years in Egypt (she studied Arabic). While she was there (and here in UK to), she smoked lots of cannabis.
In the same year we met she suddenly dropped with cancer. She was '27' yrs old. She was also 'proper beautiful'.
It was proven that it was all the cheap cannabis she smoked that was the blame. Not the cigs she mixed it with (though smoking does cause cancer to).

She was rushed back home when she collapsed. She was in hospital for months. The doctors gave her a biopsy and that was when I saw her last. She came to visit her friends before the operation.

She was going in to theatre to have an operation. She was told 1 of 3 things will happen.
1 - She will never wake up.
2 - She will wake up, but will lose one of her lungs (its possible to live through life with one lung).
3 - The operation will be a success and she will be fine.

Number 3 happened (thank god).

After this experience she had to, and wanted a lifestyle change. I knew that we could never be lovers again (and that was a shame), but I wanted her to live her dream so to lose her as a lover was not a problem.
She saw she had a second chance in life and she took it. Now she's married and very happy in Egypt.

The point of telling you this is that when smoking weed, if ones lungs are prone to cancer, the weed 'opens' the lungs up to take in more of the smoke. That's one part of what makes people high. The other part is the THC (the active chemical).

Remember though, she was '27' when this happened. It scared the hell out of all of us.
This story has a happy ending, but not all stories do.

[Fresia]

Can think of it this way too.... The other side of rebellion can also be the one who stands firm to their values by also saying no to peer pressure, if it comes down to that. There's a bit of rebel in going against your peers who partake.

From the stories above and common sense, there is little to be gained and more harm than good with serious consequences from doing any kind of drugs. You don't know what you are getting with the drugs even if friends say,"Oh, I know this guy" they get it from; who he gets it from maybe the problem, you never know. A friend in high school used to smoke pot and one day we left a party where she had smoked some with some she knew regularly. She started to freak out, hallucinating badly. Her arm disappeared on her and she saw and felt snakes everywhere; I headed to the hospital but she passed out before I could get there. It has been laced with PCP in such a high dose it would have killed her had I not taken her. She was in a coma for weeks and was not the same when she came out of it. I could tell you more stories but all have the same disasterous and unfortunate results.

Listen to what makes the most sense for you and your life goals, to have a healthy and balanced life. If you are missing something in your life, try other things that are exciting but not chemically mind altering to fulfill what's missing. Be a rebel and stand your ground on what you value in your life, your life.

[lynn P.]

My advice is don't try it and you received good advice from Sanada. Weed can have adverse psychological affects for some people - its even been linked to schizophrenia for some. The next important point is - you said you wanted to try it to take the edge of and relax in social settings - this is hallmark 'self medicating' behavior. Sure some smoke it with no problems but if a persons taking it to take of the edge, this can result in habit forming behavior. Then when someone offers you something stronger you may want to try this, to feel better....and so the story goes.

As far as peer pressure - I was always the kind of teenager who marched to the beat of my own drum and I encourage my girls to do the same. Things are going well and your grades are good - weed is known to affect motivation. I agree with Sanada - your brain is still forming. I don't know if you're on any medications but you also have to think of drug interaction. I also believe if I'm feeling miserable - I would rather sit with that feeling and work my way out of that mood....than self medicate and cover up my feelings. Who cares if you can't follow the crowd in this respect - honor your body and mind. This is my motherly advice.

[Indie'sOK]

Thank you so much everyone. You all must think I'm really stupid for thinking like this and I'm actually surprised I didn't get some ranting reply. If I were to do it, I would be getting the stuff from a friend's parents that grow it legally, for medical purposes. Real responsible parenting there, but whatever. I guess I always knew I'd never really do it. I crave something mind-altering, though. Too bad the only way to achieve that is through drugs.

[RunningEagleRuns]

It is very possible weed gave me schizophrenia. The only place it will take you is jail. DONT DO IT!

[RunningEagleRuns]

Originally Posted by Indie'sOK

Thank you so much everyone. You all must think I'm really stupid for thinking like this and I'm actually surprised I didn't get some ranting reply. If I were to do it, I would be getting the stuff from a friend's parents that grow it legally, for medical purposes. Real responsible parenting there, but whatever. I guess I always knew I'd never really do it. I crave something mind-altering, though. Too bad the only way to achieve that is through drugs.

Try music or sports.

[Indie'sOK]

Art is the closest I've ever come...I can't play music and I loath sports.

[Sanada]

Originally Posted by Indie'sOK

Thank you so much everyone. You all must think I'm really stupid for thinking like this and I'm actually surprised I didn't get some ranting reply. If I were to do it, I would be getting the stuff from a friend's parents that grow it legally, for medical purposes. Real responsible parenting there, but whatever. I guess I always knew I'd never really do it. I crave something mind-altering, though. Too bad the only way to achieve that is through drugs.

hello indie'ok.

The only lesson to be learned here is that when experimenting with anything, one cannot predict the future. Anything can happen. That's the thing you need to know.
You are too young to be thinking about altering you're mind. You're mind does not need altering.

Ok.....Indie......here goes.

Maybe later in life a medical reason happens to make you take a prescribed medication, that's something that may happen.
Illegal or prescribed influences on the mind can be and are dommino effects on the mind.

Check this out........music is my 'upper' in the morning with a coffee. It comes from the same craving of the need for pleasure.

Take time to consider you're own future well being.

[Indie'sOK]

I feel like art and music used to "do it" for me, but not anymore. I miss that.

Thanks for this, you guys.

[Indie'sOK]

ETA: I should clarify that the pot was for my friend's mom's medical use, not mine.

[AdamAW]

It looks to me that your problem is your reason WHY you are restraining - out of the wish to be 'good.'

I would certainly encourage you to avoid it, but the problem is it really has to come from within you. Also, you should avoid people who smoke it too, as it will be very difficult for you to refrain from smoking it indefinitely if you are spending time with these people.

You should avoid smoking this stuff first and foremost for your own sake - so that you can be the person that you have the potential to be, rather than spending your time - any of your time - feeling so spaced out of your head that all you are capable of doing is smiling, eating, or sleeping.

Oh, and yes, I am speaking from experience!

[Sanada]

Hey adam, I used to call weed the 'will killer'..lol.

Very true what you said. It can distract for some people. When I did it, it killed my will to do something.

Thing have times and places. Mind altering drugs must be only when needed.
Alcohol is a mind altering drug, and I can buy it in every street corner store and its legal.

Weed is legal in Holland (kinda - decriminalised is the term).

Again everything has a time and place, drugs should not dictate moods (unless medical), alcohol for e.g is something most of the people I know do after work (not to excess though).

In my life - to be honest......the most mind altering drug has been a book.

[Bitsandpieces]

I'm going to be the black sheep here. You need at least ONE black sheep!
I smoke weed, and I have never seen anything wrong with it. It's not something you do EVERY DAY, it won't impact your grades AT ALL. (I'm getting nearly all As, at the moment).
The key lies in moderation, if you do it all the time, it WILL impact your life; if you just do it when you feel like it, when you go out or when you're really stressed, it's more than fine. It's just like alcohol, you wouldn't drink every day. And, actually, it doesn't have all the aggressive side to it that alcohol has.
What it does do, is relax you, make you happy and dumb and giggly and weird and hungry for a while, and then pass.

I'm not saying you should do it. If you don't want to, you shouldn't. I understand you want to feel more confident and relaxed, I feel the same. I'm a jittery thing, nervous, tense, always in control, and I hate it. But, a thing I've learned is that if you're not comfortable in the first place, weed might just make it worse. If you decide to try it, make sure you're ALREADY feeling ok, don't do it TO feel ok, because it won't help, at all.
So there, this isn't some moralistic reason to not do it, but an actual, tested-on-myself sad, sad fact. If you're gonna smoke to feel better in a situation where you don't feel ok, it's not gonna work. If that is your only reason to, don't, because it'll make you a bazillion times more anxious and make you close yourself in your head.
What I am saying,though, is that it really doesn't deserve the stigma, it's nothing like hard drugs, it's something that may very well be legalized instead of alcohol, which is a much meaner thing.

[(JD)]

You said it yourself: this would be a bad decision. I also think you need to look behind the real reasons for wanting to make such a bad decision.

I think you are hanging out with the wrong people. I think you know that. I also think that that is the reason you can't go to your dad, who has all the good reasons to not put this into your good life. He'd make you quit hanging around with them, wouldn't he. Well, another bad decision won't make the first one right either.

Swim against the current. Those are the fish that don't get eaten. Everyone else following the crowd get caught in the nets together.

Your grades will go down, your attitude will change, your relationship with those who wish you hadn't tried the mj (to which you would then be addicted and looking to try something else, hey why not? You followed your friends already..) anyway, those relationships will become strained... you could lose the hopes of your future, you could lose your life. It's not all it's cut out to be.

Yes, most of the young people probably are trying it. IDK why they couldn't learn from a generation that has "been there, done that" but trust all of us telling you don't do it.

If you really need to change your life that dramatically, talk to your folks and see what they can find to interest you more.

If you are really ready to grow up...act like the adult you are capable of being at 17, then talk to your dad and tell him what you tell us... (Or go see Courageous with him.)

[Indie'sOK]

Thanks for your replies. I don't know - I don't think my friends are the "wrong people". Heck, they've never influenced me to try anything thus far. This urge came about of my own curiosity, not their pressuring me to try it. In all honesty, I've had the same best friend since 4th grade. Even if I wanted to stop hanging out with him, I wouldn't - high school is winding down. I'd rather spend more time with him, not less.

I cannot take ANY chance of my grades being impacted by this, though. The first two years of high school included Cs and a D here and there in sophomore year. Making all Bs now, I'll be lucky if I can get in to any school. That alone puts this whole curiosity to rest.

[Rhiannonsmoon]

Dearest Indie,

I havent seen you for ages! Look I'll be honest with you , I smoke it from time to time for pain, and it doesn't ease anxiety, in fact it enhances paranoia. It will interfere with your grades and as for your friend, surely he will support your decision to abstain from drugs? I think you're wonderful for saying no.

[Indie'sOK]

Yeah, my friend doesn't care either way, which is how I prefer it.

[Elana05]

Originally Posted by Indie'sOK

Too bad the only way to achieve that is through drugs.

Hi Indie'sOK,

I have to disagree...
1. Country sky, no light pollution, no moon, grassy area, lost in stars
2. Walk in a very slow moving stream on an overcast day (you'll need hip boots for this one). The sky will be reflected in the water ahead of you and you'll swear you're walking on the sky

Sending supportive thoughts...