Hey. I hope it is okay for me to post this... I guess I'll find out... I was wondering how people here feel about threads evolving over time...

I mean... Somebody starts a thread with some topic or other and then people post to the thread...

Is it okay for people to direct their responses to posters other than the poster who started the thread?

Is it okay for the conversation to split out into seperate tangents so there could be two or three or four discussions going on within the thread?

I mean... I understand that sometimes people really are looking for support or an answer to a question or something. I understand that it would be rather rude to jump on in and ignore that person. But I also have sympathy for the notion that threads evolve over time and that the person who started the thread could post 'hey i started this thread and i'm feeling a little ignored' and i would imagine that would be enough to reign the conversation back in to its original topic if the person who started the thread felt so inclined.

How do people decide what is and is not on topic anyways?
If I start a thread with ((((((((((gg)))))))) then if she replies ((((((((((special_k))))))))))) then is that off topic cause the thread is about giving gg hugs?

Is this making any kind of sense to anybody?????

I just mean that general chat...
Isn't it more about connecting with people than 'staying on topic'
?

Or are we being graded or something?

;-)

[LMo]

I know what you mean. Some people are really particular about their threads staying on track. I have to watch myself because I'm really likely to stray if I see an interesting option for a tangent. I try to keep in mind who gets offended and who is okay with it. If in doubt, or if I don't know the person well, then I do my best to stay on topic (but I don't always succeed)

Hmm. I hear what you are saying...

It would be kinda cool if there was some way for people to signal... I mean... Sometimes people feel kinda proud that their threads take off regardless of the topic... Othertimes people have more specific ends in mind (re answers to their questions and stuff). I understand that too...

Would be kinda cool if people could signal that with their threads or... If we could do that but people knew to say that they felt ignored or whatever if it came to that with minimal of negative feelings...

I personally tell people when I want my threads to stay on topic. for example I started a thread in self injury in which the focus of the thread was positive ways to check in with each other and positive resourses and ways to help others in stopping their cutting and other self injury behaviours. I let it be known that that thread I wanted it to remain focused on the positive so that those looking for positive ways to help themselves they did not have to read through some possible negative rants and cutting activity that could trigger the person that was already on rocky ground when they went looking for that thread. When some expressed the need to also be able to vent about their cutting behaviour and the things that triggered them into cutting I started another thread one specifically for that so that those that wanted a place on my threads to vent and talk about the cutting and that way those that wanted to be able to read only the positives still had the thread that focuses on the positives free from the graphics of the act of cutting and rants and so forth.

Also there is nothing here that says you can't start your own thread that is a thread specifically for tangents and multiple topics

Yes that makes sense. I see that some threads are started with a specific purpose in mind and I most certainly see the sense in building threads of positive coping strategies and the like.

I guess we can start new threads...

So... As a general rule... If a thread gets locked 'cause people go off topic then you can start a new thread to discuss those topics?

I do find some things a bit confusing here...

not necessarily. once a topic has been locked that topic is no longer up for discussion because it either goes against one of the rules of the site or because people were getting too heated and starting to target each other. if you want to start a thread about a locked topic then your best option is to pm a moderator and administrator who can tell you more specifically why they locked the thread and if it is ok for you to start a new topic from something in the locked thread.

In general if the topic is not locked its open for discussion and people can start new threads about something that is contained in that thread that they want to go off topic for.

ah. hence my confusion...
thanks.

[DocJohn]

Threads are topic-oriented, therefore members who post things that take the thread off-topic are doing a disservice (and possibly disrepecting) the original thread poster. Threads cost nothing to start (they're free!), so there's absolutely no reason not to start your own if you feel like you want to get into something not directly related to the original topic.

Threads are closed most often because one or more of the members participating in the thread have crossed over the line and violated one of the community guidelines. An explanation is posted to the thread about the community guideline violated.

That is not to say that the topic is always off-limits. The topic itself may have been fine, it's just that people's discussion of it went in a direction that is prohibited by the community guidelines. It varies from situation to situation and every thread and situation is judged on its own merits.

DocJohn

[Mystry]

Hey all this talk about threads is making me want to sew...lol...

[gardenergirl]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
special_k said:

How do people decide what is and is not on topic anyways?
If I start a thread with ((((((((((gg)))))))) then if she replies ((((((((((special_k))))))))))) then is that off topic cause the thread is about giving gg hugs?


</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

(((((((((special_k))))))))))

gg

tee hee!
(just joking)

Okay topic oriented... Gottcha.

I understand that threads can be locked because things are becoming heated and that when that happens it is best to leave the topic for a time (hence the locking of the thread).

S
When the thread is progressing amicably enough... I guess I think that sometimes the on topic / off topic line can be hard to draw. Especially when the originator of the thread seems happy to partake in the diversions. Original topic... Related topic... Tangientially related topic... Tricky.

Thanks for helping clarify.

[hillbunnyb]

case by case, person by person, trial and error. do your best and say, "oops, sorry" if you srew up is the way i go about it.

[Kalamity]

I'm replying without reading other people's responses. I don't want to e influenced by someone elses response.

I don't see internet communication, no matter what form it may take, any different then face to face communication. When we speak face to face we often stray from the original topic, and in groups many people will take up their own discussion.

We don't ask that people stop their individual discussions or to move away from the table or group, so I don't see why we would feel that way about discussions on the internet.

There is an exception though, when people are discussing matters that are not even an off-shoot of the original discussion I think they should take it to PM, e-mail, or a new thread, because at that point in does completely detract from what was being discussed.

As for your question about hugs - were the hugs for the original poster or for someone who commented? If they are for someone who commented then it possible that the original poster will feel as though someone else has taken attention away from their issues. When acknowledging the feelings and issues of someone other than the person who originally posted it might be better if it were done in PM.

This of course is only my opinion.

[Rhapsody]

I personally feel that it is NOT off topic if the next reply is in connection with the reply they are responding to.... we can always get back to the original topic.
And - I personally like to see where the first question or topic might lead to - just like in real life.... one topic can start another one, but does that make it wrong - NO (imho).

BTW - I personally do not care if one of my post go to another topic while talking of the first topic... for that my dear fiends is real COMMUNICATION!!

LoVe,
Rhapsody - ((( hugs )))

[Maven]

I think it's natural for threads to evolve. I'll agree that it makes it harder to know what threads you want to respond to when they change topics, because the subject says one thing but the conversation has evolved to another, but it doesn't really bother me. You can type a different subject in a thread when it evolves, so while you have to look inside the thread, if you scan subjects, you'll see the people are on a different topic. And that different topic, when it's the most recent thing posted to, will show up on the main board page, so you don't need to open up the topic to see if there's a subject change most recently. Did that make sense?

[Lexicon78]

When I post to a thread I don't usually pay attention to what others have said, but I usually pay attention to what the thread-starter first asked for or said.

Like if a person is looking for advice or support and someone takes it off topic then it becomes quite invalidating and rude to the person that started the thread and I hate it when people end up feeling awful when they don't get the due attention that they need.