Controversial topic!

I think a forum for the teens is a great idea.....

I think it depends on the child for example if it was a child like mine who constantly worries about things no I would not want him on a mixed board. But yet if it was a child who was able to understand that just because one person has something it doesnt mean they have to have it to like a friends child that is the same age as mine I'd say yes, because that child knows when she has a problem and she looks for solutions instead of dramatizing and trying to keep up with the jones's of every new disorder on earth, in fact the child I did tell the mom of this child how to find psychcentral for the daughter and the daughter has been here with no problems at all with handling the site and topics. The mom oversees her computer time here and they take time to discuss what is being read and replying about and the teen is fully aware that this site is not meant to replace therapy and to be used in crisis. she is using the site like she should - as a supliment to her real time therapy program with her therapist in her local city.

Also just because someone says they are a teen or are not a teen does not make them a teen or not a teen on line. What is gonig to happen by separating things here by age? well look at real life what happens in real life when people are met with age limits. Adults pretend to be younger sometimes to get the teen discounts of they can pull it off and teens engage in getting fake ID's so that they can partake in adult activities. Well you start putting age limited areas and the teens leave and reregister as adults so that they can access the adult areas. so they will get in anyway no one here submits birth certificates to register and enter chat and read the boards right?

When on line no one knows for sure who anyone is. there are lots of adults on line pretending to be children and there are lots of children on line posing as adults. For example I say I am 43 but only those people here that are a part of my real life know if I am 15, 11, 18, 43, 60 you name the age no one knows for sure.

Personally I accept the person regardless of age and so on. This is not talksexwithsue.com its a mental health website and teens and children have mental health problems just like adults.

well, i'm 15 and i'm really happy here, i used to be realy into the on-line pro-ana scene then i got out and tried to go to a teenagers ED site but some of them obviously still wanted to keep their ED going and encouraged others to do the same, i got down to a pretty low weight, then got away from the pro-ana stuff and put some back on then i went on this ED help site for teenagers and there were some people who were still encouraging me to lose weight again so i did, when people on a help site are telling you to lose weight it sticks in your mind!

on here, people are so... well... adult! they stand up for the things i actually need, i rely on you guys, i was only told i had bi-polar a few months ago and i had NO clue what it was, the people here have helped me understand and i don't feel that bad about it now!

i haven't seen any other 'kids' posting alot actually, and i think that i would be very lost without you guys and no doubt in a hospital bed as a skeleton, kids need help too remember!

siani x

teenagers posting for teenagers WON'T WORK, the teenagers come here because they need help from the adults in simple words that they understand! i came here because i needed to understand things, instead of being pulled down a route i didn't want to take!

why should you just split off teenagers from the rest of the community? aren't we people? don't we deserve help? and where would be the cut off point for this teenagers forum? 14? 16? 18? 21? because many people would argue that 16 years is almost adult! and many of you are barely over 21 yourselves! does suddenly a switch flick on in your mind when you turn 18 and you are 'adult'? its a number! not a person! if i hadn't got '15' in my signature would you really know?

a community is about diversity! different colours, different stykes, different lives, DIFFERENT AGES! remember that.... you can't call yourself a community if children are banished away. to a different place.

sorry i've been rambling and sorry i was a little aggressive but i really feel for this! i have made such a connection with razeljenny and she would be classed as adult whereas i would be classed as a child! we are supporting each other through our ED's, would you just pull us apart because of as number? this is ludicrus!

Not the point Siani, if you read the posts a little more closely.

From what I can summarise here ...

1) Teenagers deserve help just as much as older people, and NOBODY is trying to deny that
2) Some teenagers have caused issues for other members, especially in the chat room (not so much evidence of this on the boards). The upshot of this is some animosity amongst members
3) Some teenagers are more mature than others (most people acknowledge this). However, there isn't really any way of differentiating without discriminating
4) It has been suggested that teenagers would benefit from their own space on PC, perhaps where older members could come in at their discretion
5) Most also agree that older members need some area of their own as well ... perhaps a division of the board and a division of chat

No one is saying you are going to be 'banished', just recognising different needs is very important in a community such as PC.

By the way, it's 'ludicrous'.

NOT the hiphop spelling

DocJohn said -

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Does that mean that adults and teens/children face the same issues? No, they don't. Teens and children face very different issues than adults, and have a very different set of social skills than adults. And that, to me, speaks for the need to, at the very least, consider again the need for a teen place on Psych Central.

This time around, I'm fairly convinced it's time to create such a place for teens, including their own chat room. I don't want to stigmatize or exclude a set of the population due to no fault of their own (their age), and I see no reason to do so.

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Excellent!

Kids should always be restricted according to their age for their own safety, by their parents.

I have kids and restrict their tv viewing, social lives etc. Its hard because not many parents bother to do this,
but it is the right thing to do for them.

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_Sky said:
I have always been an advocate of learning. The internet was not around when I was raising my children. I do have grandchildren

While I trust PC very much, there are still common dangers that come with using the internet. Knowing PC as I do, and it's adult nature, I would say I would not allow any child of mine to come here, with or without any disorder.

I find it difficult to believe that any professional would send a child to an adult site, really. The thought processes and concerns are totally different.

I'm sure there are sites out there for the younger internet user, with appropriate moderation, where they can go for peer review. How can they relate to us here? How can they feel like they fit in here? Maybe in a certain forum, if disodered, but not overall? I think they need the peer responses that adults have to work at: how was school today? Did your mom rag on you for not doing your chore? etc.. and to have a response that doesn't necessarily include what an adult would "normally" express.

Though they can still read here, children are more impressionable, and might be more inclined to read and believe they have something terribly wrong with them when instead it's just part of growing up!

Sorry, as good as PC is, the child needs something better for herself! (IMO)



edit added "impressionable" sentence.

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<font color="purple"> Very well stated Sky.... </font>

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SerenitysWave said:
...... Quoting SKY -
While I trust PC very much, there are still common dangers that come with using the internet. Knowing PC as I do, and it's adult nature, I would say I would not allow any child of mine to come here, with or without any disorder. </font>

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If I may ask? - What exactly is the adult nature of this site that I am missing and what dangers might lie within that nature for young teens 13 to 18 years of age?

Thanks.....
Question is for Sky - and for any other that wishes to reply.... I ask, for I am open to being educated.

LoVe,
Rhapsody -

> I feel as though the same stigma that folks with mental disorders face in general society is being replicated here against teens or children facing the same or similar issues.

That is a pretty strange feeling to be having... Typically feelings refer to something along the lines of an interpretation of a pattern of bodily response... Feelings are things like guilt and shame and frustration and anger. I think you mean to say that you think that ' the same stigma that folks with mental disorders face in general society is being replicated here against teens or children facing the same or similar issues'. Now... How do you feel when you interpret people as doing that?

> Does that mean that adults and teens/children face the same issues? No, they don't.

Don't they? I thought you just said you felt (or thought) they did.

I would have thought that anxiety, depression, SA, SI, issues around identity, eating disorders, in fact any disorder there is a place for here are disorders that are also found in adolescents. Even in children (in some instances). Though I would think that the literacy skills required to read detailed posts... The interest required in the first place... Would mean that not many children would be particularly interested in such a site.

> Teens and children face very different issues than adults, and have a very different set of social skills than adults.

I've met a number of teens who have better social skills than a number of adults I've met off boards. Some teens are pretty good at differentiating thoughts from feelings, for example. I'm wondering how much comments like yours tend to perpeptuate the stigma you were interpreting other people as displaying in that first quote.

Funny how people are more bothered by teens than they are by expressions of religion...

Or maybe it is that people are more concerned about teens having their own special place than they are interested in people having their own special place to talk about religon...

What next?

May I suggest a different board for people from ethnic minority groups as people who belong to an ethnic minority may well face different issues from those who aren't a member of an ethnic minority group.

Research on intelligence and so on and so forth suggests that people from an ethnic minority group aren't as likely to have good literacy skills...

Is there a problem with the analogy or is it illuminating do you think?

What makes this a safe community are the majority of wonderful adults whom spend numerous hours online here. Creating a place for teens would not be safe. The wonderful adults here would/could not invest their time ensuring the teens were continually in a healthy Psych Central environment (if the teens had their own forum or chat). What we have now does not prevent teens from obtaining support from each other.

It makes me sad some adults are tired supporting teens who need help.

Reinventing the wheel for teens isn't a small task. I seriously doubt it would be very successful.

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What we have now does not prevent teens from obtaining support from each other.

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Except for 2 or 3 RIGHT NOW don't WANT support from each other! Come to chat in the evenings and you'll see that the majority only come to ACT OUT!! What's so hard to understand about that??

I think it's important that we all keep in mind the distinction between:

1) teens that want help with mental health issues
vs
2) teens that don't

From what I've read, I looks like everyone seems to be in agreement that we're talking about the first group when describing the "ideal" support situation.

The reality here is that we allegedly have a contingent of the 2nd group.

Drunksunflower summarized it well, IMO.

THANK YOU, LMo!!! That's exactly it!

You were one of the mods that got called in to help with a contentious teen. There was absoltely no positive outcome, was there?

I applaud you for being one of the ones that has offered to help with these teens! You're a better woman than I am... or you're young and with less mental health issues that enables you to have the energy and willingness to do this. I know they'll be in good hands with you!

Maybe the problem is the chat software used?

Maybe no one should be chatting without the presence of a CHAT moderator?

Adults don't need it constant moderation!

I want to add my 2 cents, as an adult with DID I have fears that the younger ppl won't understand when an alter comes out, in chat Amy has enjoyed visiting, now there is fear again, this is such a emotional topic, if the younger mind has a dx will they add to it cuz it sounds neat, or it seems like they'll get more attention, my dx's are not play things but in the hands/minds of children they may not use this info correctly, not meaning to offend anyone just nervous

mama I couldn't agree more!

I don't think anyone is asking per sey for another forum but another chatroom for the teens. I like a few others are in chat every night and lately we have seen the influx of teens coming in that have caused some problems. It is sad and if any teen needs support I am there for them and many of them know this. I get pm's in chat and my pm box from teens. They know I will help if they just ask. But some are here from drama. That is not what pc is for. These are real issues that all of us deal with..just my 2 cents worth

In answer to the original poster's question:
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Would you as a parent prefer that they went on a website specifically aimed for their age- range?

What do you think?

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Well, I think some children and teens are very mature and can benefit from being here---- however-- with that being said--- I agree with docjohn in that they struggle with very different issues. They would benefit (IMO) the most from a support area that knows how to listen to them and respond to them in a helpful way. Many of us--myself included-- don't have the training or ability to say the best thing to a struggling teen. Not meaning they can't go to other forums... just that they could have a special one for them, with perhaps a seperate chat room that they can use--moderated by adults that can understand and give helpful support.

I want to see them get help just as much as anyone else-- it's just--- I don't think I'm qualified to be of much help to them. I get triggered or feel upset and then I find myself struggling and fear I'll say something that will only make things worse for them.

I don't think adding a new forum for teens and/or a chat for them as something negative-- it's showing-IMO-- that we care and want the best and will set a place for them so that they can truly have helpful support from people that are able to be there for them.

I'm sorry-- I'm just not one that knows how to support most young people-(I went through my young years totally afraid of everyone/everything and never reached out, never got in trouble, hadn't any friends--- I just can't relate to most of what teens are going through )

Young brains, they are finding, are different than adult brains---- hope this link works: The Teen Brain

So, I do think there is a place here for young minds..... just would be nice if they had a specific place that they could be confident in reaching out and getting helpful support.

It's a tough subject...... I do worry that some young ones reading here-- since they can be impressionable, will mimic things they read... just so they--themselves-- will be heard-- I hope that's rarely the case.

Anyway.... phew-- can't believe I said all this!!! -- young ones are very valued in my eyes(I have two of my own) and it's hard for me to be silent whenever it comes to doing what's best for our youth.

Wishing everyone a good day/night.
mandy

I'd like to see a forum for "human development." Since we have quite a few teens, and teens go through a lot of developmental issues, they might be there a lot. People could also ask about their children and what is developmentally appropriate at a particular age. Some parents may ask advice for communicating with and understanding their teens and children. Maybe aging and adult development would also find a place there.

I already have several questions for such a forum, such as what chores and responsibilities are considered appropriate for kids (my T said that it isn't appropriate for my 12 and 14-year-olds do be responsible for their own laundry, for example, and I wonder about that). Another question I would like to discuss is how teens experience just being teens (I was essentially not allowed to be a teenager because my parents thought teenagers were bad). And also discussion of issues such as "the generation gap." What do you think?

I know I keep reading alot about how teens are causing problems in chat rooms, but then again.. I've seen allot of older members cause problems in chat rooms too. I truely just see a need for us to be more sensitive. Respect people for the emotional maturity that htey are at, and if you can't deal with it, walk away from the situation. I do think having a forum for teenage issue is beneficial, but also think they should be allowed to post where they want. Anything that is extremely sexually graphic to the point of being adult, probably shouldn't be in the open forum anyway in my opinion. Just my thoughts.

Ok. It was a controversial topic and I thought it was well worth the debate.

Hugs to ALL at Psych Central!

<font color="blue"> [b]DocJohn, I see you have added a TEEN CHATROOM. I can't find any guidelines to go with it. I need some.

Does this mean no adults? (I doubt it.) But if adults do go in there, are we supposed to allow a chat to travel any pathway the teens want it to? I'm thinking of recent chats here... where talk of waiting for illegal drugs to be delivered, and illicit sexual conduct was the main conversation of the young ppl. (Young ppl as under 16!)

While I wouldn't force my morals onto anyone, how can we set an example for the young ppl to follow if we aren't there? And how can we be in chat and not express our views? (Don't those above topics fall into the not allowed guidelines here, so we are obliged to nudge them off the topics?) By expressing our adult views in a teen chat, aren't we by it's very nature putting ourselves "above" them? (Something that is negative, imo. But teens aren't equal to adults in many areas, yet are humans just like everyone else.)

I think a list of "How Tos" would be really nice to have, so that all of us...young ppl included... stand on the same foundation.

I want to support this effort. I want to do my best in this. I am personally cautious of drawing back a nub for trying though. I mean, I can make up my own list because I can...but it might be a bit different than yours.

Please guide us in how you wish us to continue the change.