Keeping a Journal

Does anyone here keep a journal? I have had that suggested to me by just about all of the mental health professionals I have ever encountered. I tried once, but I was so worried that someone would find it and read my deepest thoughts that I ripped it up and never did it again. I am considering it now though because I find that after writing a letter or making a post I feel kind of relieved, but then sometimes I wish I didn't actually send/post it. I suppose it has to do with feeling too vulnerable and exposed. I would like to hear from anyone that keeps a journal, and if it helps you or not.

Thanks!

Sujin

I have been keeping a journal for about eight years now and I can tell you that it defiantly does help to release all those bent up feelings that we are struggling to get out. I also personally found that the more I wrote the less that I worried about what others might think if they found my book of deep thoughts and wounds. I write as a means to HEAL...


LoVe,
Rhapsody -

The tought sounds wonderful but I don't think that I would stick with it.....

I dont keep a journal, sujin, instead i find writing it down in the form of a song helps me the most. So id say yeah, give it another try at least, and buy one of those lock-ups and put it in there, and keep the key with you so you know no-one else can get at it. expressing your deepest emotions by writing it down is very helpful, even if it means ripping it up afterwards, i used to write it down on A4 paper, and then when id finished, id rip it up to symbolise the destruction of those feelings and emotions.

Good luck with it sujin and i hope you find a solution that helps.

Take care

I keep many types of journals. I have one where I free write about anythinga nd everything,

I have one spefically for monitoring my depression and anxiety levels with the book mind over mood,

one for my therapy - thoughts about questions and conversations during therapy, and letters to my therapist

and I also have one here called a blog which focuses on my experiences with DID and therapy and researcha and so on for my healing from this disorder.

I don't woory about others reading them I have microsoft word and I write on that and then instead of saving my entry on my computer I save it on a floppy disk.

I do keep journals. While I destroyed my very first ones after the injury because I couldn't bear to read about the pain I was in... I have journaled for years since. I have boxes and boxes of them sigh. I live alone or the idea of someone reading would drive me ahhem..crazy? After I'm gone, then let whomever read them! If they never knew the pain I was in, that was their doing, not mine.

My journals have come in handy, as my memory continues to fail. I insist my T had said such and such and when I review it in session and he disagrees as to his stance, I dig out the journal (yes it might take a few days to find the right one) and read ...that the T is remembering correctly. Without my noting in the journal, and then reading it, I would always question.

It's best to make them so you can reread, and see where you progress... but you are right, imo, that just the writing it out can be therapeutic. TC

Thanks so much, everyone! I am going to start keeping a journal, I think it will help. I like the idea of getting one with a lock too, that's a good idea! I really appreciate all the helpful suggestions and insights!

Love,
Sujin

Sujin, good move!
I've been keeping journals for about ten years. I thank my T for encouraging me to do that. It's been a lifesaver for me! I carry it with me in my purse! I've filled up a few dozen notebooks already! Journaling is a great way to release tension, express emotion, jot down thoughts or ideas I fear I'll forget, etc. From time to time I'll reread an old journal to track my progress, and it feels great!
Now that I have a computer I journal on "word", and still carry a little notebook with me when I leave the house.
As to someone reading what I've written: I've shared my journaling with my therapist, at times. And the more I come to self-acceptance, the less I fear being exposed. Yeah, I'd not want someone to find and read my notebooks, but hey, if they do, I'll get over it.
Best of luck on your new endeavor!

I've been keeping a journal on & off for many years, but I go through them periodically & throw stuff out that I wrote when very depressed or angry. The reason I do this is that my mother didn't keep a journal, but she wrote letters to my father when she had left the country (she found out my father was going to have her involuntarily committed in a mental institution & fled-- she should have been committed). For some reason he kept these letters & we (the children) found them in his effects after he died. They contained some horrible passages about how much she hated her children (us), that I was a ***** (I was only 15 when she died) , etc. Needless to say these were very painful to read & triggered all sorts of painful memories & emotions in me & my siblings. I know I've written some things about myself in my depressions that I would never want my children to see, so that's why I end up throwing stuff out. I never wrote bad things about my kids, but I did write some harrowing passages about contemplating suicide, etc.

Many people keep journals, and there are even communities for people who do that. Heck, there's even a magazine by Writer's Digest, Personal Journaling. Furthermore, there are those who share personal stories as a way of preserving history. You don't have to do that, but I'm just showing how popular journaling is, both private journals and diaries, and those you share to express yourself and the way you see the world.

I love to write..and I have been told my whole life that I have a gift for it..and I always kept a diary or journal of some kind..but for some reason this always got me into trouble..SOMEONE always found it..read it and exposed me..My mother was the worst..I could try and hide it the best I could..she would find it and use it against me..so to this day I have trouble trusting myself to write my TRUE feelings in a book that I feel so vulerable that someone might find. I live thousand of miles away from my mother..but now I am married and I think I would be truly embarressed if my hubby read some of the things that trouble my mind. I long to write, but I don't trust it..not anymore..makes me sad!

I keep a journal, well, really it's called a blog. You can register for a free one on a number of different sites. Just google "free blog" or "free weblog" and a few sites will come up. On most of the sites yo ucan determine how you want your blog to look, who can comment, whether or not you want to password-protect a post. (If you password protect the post, no one can see it without knowing the password). Hope this helps!
Take Care,
Angel

Hi Liv,

That is why I am going to go buy a padlocked journal with a key, like Simon suggested. I was at Walgreens yesterday and picked up some notebooks on sale, but it still feels unsafe to me so I think I will spend the extra money to purchase one I feel more secure with.

I wouldn't worry so much if my fiance' read what I write, there's not much that I would write about that he doesn't already hear on a daily basis, and even though he loves the communication we have and loves the fact that I'm completely open with him, I feel sometimes like I need to vent in a place where I don't feel like I'm unloading on anyone on a daily basis. The funny thing is, I don't mind when someone "unloads" on me, I just feel like I should unload some things in private (Lol, that sounds kind of funny ). Plus, I wouldn't want my son to accidently find a notebook and get curious and start reading. There are just some things our kids don't need to know about us.

Anyway, thanks again to everyone who replied, I really love and appreciate the support here!

Love,
Sujin

I hope this works out for you..maybe one day I will take this chance again too.. we will see!! ((HUGS)))

Yeah, there's always a risk of someone discovering your most intimate thoughts and feelings. You might also feel more secure if you buy a lockbox as well for it.

Another thing you might do is this: Create a "decoy" journal. Write stuff in it each day, like you do with your real journal, but keep the content to things that won't give people anything to use against you. Make up stuff, be creative. Have fun! You don't have to lock this one up, but hide it, so it looks like it's something you didn't want found. If someone finds it, they will think that's your real journal, and not bother looking for your real one! :-)

Great idea but doesn't always work. I tried that and the person who went .looking found not only the fake one but the real one too. Which is one of the reasons that when I was keeping my journals on paper I used plain note books instead ofa fancy journal. I also didn't make a big deal about hiding it. people go looking for what a person is keeping secret to see why they are keeping a secret. My son is a very inquisitive child (I have to admit he came by it natually for I am always asking and looking for answers LOL) anyway I would let people see my writing grocery lists, my monthy bills and budget and so on in the same notebook. That stuff is boring. One day my son asked me why I don't keep a journal - his therapist was teaching him how to journal. I laughed and told him I do (it was sitting in plain sight on the table) he runs into my bedroom and starts looking for it. A friend came over and we had coffee with my journal sitting right there in plain sight but since she saw the electric bill sitting just inside the cover and stilcking out she thought it was my budget book and didnt pay it no mind.

There are no guarantees. You can also create your own personal secret code to write your thoughts in.

Myself that is great!! Never thought of that..I always think to keep my most intimate thoughts so hidden and secretive..I neve thought that this could lead to more problems..but of course now that I think of it..it makes perfect sense..I think that is great how you put it and "how the best hiding place is always out in the open and right in front of thier eyes" I actually brought a spiral notebook to work with me today..THIS IS HUGE FOR ME..I am thinking since I have so much quiet time to myself during the afternoons to take some time for myself..whether or not I actually KEEP what I write time will tell..but this is a start.
Sujin..thanks for starting this post..this is definately something I needed to work on too!!! (((HUGS))

Thanks. LOL