[shortandcute]

I've been lying this whole time. I really do not have mental illness. I'm going off my meds and decided to drop my disability claim and get a job.

[avlady]

i wish you luck

[brillskep]

Congrats on your decision! Good luck!

[vans1974]

Good choice and best of luck!

It sounds like you're confused, shortandcute. Your post says one thing, but your little mood tracker says something else.

[-jimi-]

Of course you have not been lying. Maybe you see things from a new perspective, maybe someone triggered you into thinking you should "straighten up". People don't go on meds for a lie because it's not fun being on meds, it's something you do when you are out of other options. Maybe you're not even yourself at the moment.

If you feel unbalanced or confused, it is NOT the time to make life changing decisions, those should be made when you have been stable and sure of things for a longer time.

[healingme4me]

Well, to be lying about such things, is symptomatic of bigger life issues. What happened, in life, that led you to decide to drop your claim?

Also, how'd you get the doctors to diagnose you? And give you meds? I know, for me, in the medical circle that I have, circle of doctors, primary, ob, neuro, pdoc, et al, there's been tremendous amounts of visits, with my medical information displayed through the revamping of technology..my neuro chart, is available on my primaries computer, with my pdoc and obgyn also having computer access to all my charts.

It's hard, accepting that there's 'wrong/right' where our brains are concerned, yet, I have a tough time understanding the levels you've gone through to get here?

Is everything, OK, at home?!

[healingme4me]

Sometimes, this place can be a stress reliever. I, um, have been spending most of the wee hours of the morning, resolving a couple of things, in my own life. Sometimes, words written help me learn to better manage and cope. My dx labels, for all intents and purposes are mild, in comparison. Sure, I have a neurological/physical illness that needs a ton of stress management, and yes, I score on the low end of the sanity test. At the same time, intermingling with a wide variety of personality types and styles, I find most beneficial in my real life.

It's OK, to not feel comfortable, taking prescription medications. Lots of people choose not to, it's evident all over this place.

I get how it feels to apply for disability. Gosh, I was denied with MS-Optic Neuritis(all MS patients have varying ailments, and this is supposedly the green light dx, and I really could have used the SSDI income, to escape my marriage, earlier than I did, but the review board and my neuro felt I was indeed not disabled, go figure, right? Even the ssa psychologist didn't feel I had anxiety, but try telling that to my charts.) Thing about SSA and telling people you are filing, wow, might as well tell them your stances on politics, religion and abortion, while you are at it. It's up there, in the heated blood of many, as is discussion of pyshe meds.

Calling yourself, a liar, for someone who has participated here as long as you have, leaves me wanting to reach out and just hug you or console you, because it seems like it comes from somewhere other than trying to say you've been trolling this place, which I do not believe you to be that, whatsoever.

Don't need an official label, here, to reap the benefits. I hope you'd consider staying. I'm sure you've been more than helpful to many.

[Pikku Myy]

Its a great decision Shortandcute if you feel you are ready for it. Decided to go off medications here several months ago, fired my psychiatrist, and now kind of thinking what the heck did I do Wish you good luck sweetie

[shortandcute]

Sorry about all that guys. I do have a legitimate Dx, but I just got so frustrated. My meds seemed to be helping me at first, but lately it seems like they've been making me worse; I can't get out of bed, even more so than b4 I started my meds. I've gained about 50 pounds backs--most of that's been in the last few months. Last couple of months, I've been more depressed and more suicidal than I had been in a long time, more on edge, and a total zombie. I never told my teenage daughter that I was on meds, and I don't know if she suspected anything. But the other night, we got into an arugment and she pointed out to me that I've been acting really different lately and asked if I was on something. Plus I've been frustrated and scared because I have been denied disability again; it's gone to court even, and been appealed but my attorney said it could take anywhere from six months to two years before we even know anything. And I cannot afford to wait that long. So, I was pretty much at my wits end when I spouted that off the other night. Sorry.

[healingme4me]

((((shortandcute))))

Sent from my LG-MS910 using Tapatalk 2

[-jimi-]

Sorry that you are in that harsh and confusing situation. No wonder you had a reaction. If you can't get the disability thing, you will wish you didn't need it. It's just about trying to regain control because now you are not sure what is going to happen.

About meds, they are not a diagnostic tool. If they don't help doesn't mean you don't need some kind of help, just means the meds don't do what they are supposed to. I had a med that at first made me better for a year and then slowly made me worse, actually worse than I was. I hate that meds can do that. Still, I needed something, just wish there had been better meds yanno...

I hope you have a doctor that knows meds can change in effect over time and change things around. The least you need is a psychological load and then damaging meds on top.

[too SHy]

I did the same as u I wound up in the Hosp. Take Care

[gayleggg]

Don't be sorry. You needed to get it off your chest. Sometimes things just come out, that we regret later but need to be said. I hope you will talk to your doctor about how your meds are working anymore. I am having the same trouble.

I might suggest you be honest with your daughter. Honesty helps her to understand that your moods are not about her and would explain a lot to her. She is a teenager they know when something is not right. The truth is better than their fears.

[TimeToKnow]

Best of luck to you! That is very big and difficult decision! I am sure you have thought it through.

Read your post here and I'm thinking of you! x