I don't like being touched?

So I've never been abused sexually or physically yet I cower at all physical contact unless it is a high five or fist bump that I proposed/engaged. I can't bear someone poking, prodding, even laying a hand on me. Most of the teachers don't understand this even when I tell them so they continue to give pats on the backs, etc. my dad treats it as a joke and does anything he can to upset me and make me feel uncomfortable. Every time someone touches me it is just terrifying. It makes me extremely anxious and I usually flinch severely. It just makes me want to break down and cry. I can almost describe it as a physical pain. Can anyone help?

My perspective on this is that you should first have this checked out medically. If there's nothing going on that can be addressed medically, then therapy would be the next step in order to try to figure out what is causing you to feel this way. It may be that what you'll need is to participate of some progressive desensitization. This would involve starting out with the slightest touch you can tolerate & gradually working up toward more involved touches. This is something a therapist could help you with.

I am very similar to you. I used to jump off the examining table at the MD's office when touched. They had never seen anything like it.

As a youth, my mother told me that she did not believe in hugs and would never touch me. She told me that touch was not necessary. I believed her. Did something similar also happen to you? Were you often threatened with physical discipline? Fear of physical discipline may result in fear of being touched.

Were you told not to let others touch you when you were a child to prevent you from being sexually molested? If so, maybe you misunderstood it too literally. Some touch - like a hug - is safe. Now that you are older, you can identify what is safe touch and what is unsafe touch. A child is not able to easily discern this and is instructed to avoid touch, especially with strangers. Now that you're older, it's time to put this teaching into perspective.

I don't like it that your dad treats it as a joke. Bear in mind though that by keeping it light in tone he may also be trying to help you. He may be trying to say that human touch is normal and be trying to help you adjust. He may not be laughing at you; rather, he is trying to deal with the subject in a light way and that may be the only way he knows how. It may appear insensitive but if that is his style then accept it for what it is because, in many ways, this is a very heavy subject to you.

How to overcome the problem? Ask him and others you trust for hugs. By asking for a hug, you are giving permission to touch you in a safe way. It may seem awkward at first but it is normal, safe touch. Eventually, though you may feel wary, you will adjust. Try to eventually make a hug part of your normal greeting to your dad, grandparents, close friends, etc. I hope this helps.

I don't really have any advice, but I have a similar issue. I have been like this since I was pretty young. People have asked if I was molested, but I wasn't. It's a very frustrating problem to have because some people really do not respect the fact that you don't want to hug them. Other people get offended at the flinching.

As I have gotten older, it has gotten easier for me to engage in a more normal way, giving a friend a hug, etc. I still have some issues I don't want to post publicly that are quite bothersome, but I'm not sure what to do about it either. Desensitization has worked in some ways but not others, if that makes sense. I can deal with the hugs and basic stuff, though.

You might find it interesting to read about Highly Sensitive Person and Sensory Processing Disorder.

I read your profile & you have one of your issues as being ASD.....I have been doing research in this trying to learn about the problems that existed in my 33 year marriage that I am now finally getting divorced from.

I suggest you read the book The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome by Tony Attwood. One section in the book is on Tactile Sensitivity & it states:
Sounds to me like learning more about what you are dealing in your life might be a good idea so you have a better understanding of what you are dealing with.

Thanks for the advice! As for the hugging my dad thing I'd rather not. Ill try hugging my close friends though. But not him rn. Thanks! ❤️

Thanks for the advice! I've considered aspergers for a long time now because I suffer from most if not all symptoms on a daily basis. The only reason I had dismissed the idea was due to my parents laughing at the idea of me having aspergers. I think I will bring it up with my counselor next time we speak. Thank you again! ❤️

Hugging, touching, certainly not, all right for foreigners, but hereabouts we just shake hands in an awkward sort of way. Just ask people what the devil they think they are doing when they touch you.

I too don't like being touched. It makes me instantly angry & I have to be very careful not to react to them physically. I sometimes want to scream at these people to take their grubby hands off me.

Yeah. I don't get angry though I just feel extremely anxious and flinch severely.

I can identify with not liking to be patted on the back, hugged, etc.

In my case, I didn't notice this problem until I was in my 30s. It seemed like family members were always hugging me, coworkers and friends were always patting me on the shoulder. I wonder if living alone mostly where the contact was less common caused me to develop this aversion.