[A Hobbit]

I haven't posted in such a long time. And even when I first joined I didn't post much. I don't know what to say (my mood can cycle rapidly - leaving me unsure of what I truly feel; and I just don't trust my thoughts, mood, and feelings).

But I will say that I've been in a bad way for the last couple of weeks especially. I try to fool my wife, but she is saying that I need to see someone. We have no medical insurance and are below the poverty line, so I'm not sure how that can work. I've told her that I don't want to talk to anyone about it. I've done that - for years - there is nothing left to say. She says that it will be a necessary step to get referred to a doctor. She's thinking medication; I'm thinking no. I've done that, too. A lot. I gave up meds almost 18 years ago.

I don't like to talk about my past (or current) experiences with mental health. Folk know that there is something definitely peculiar about me. "Do you have ADHD?" or, "What's the matter? We haven't heard from you in a while. You aren't answering emails, messages, etc."

Here's the set-up and question: I have a partner that I work with running an online media company. He has a son that suffers from severe clinical depression. Should I reach out and confide in him about my own struggles?

I don't know why I am asking this. Are you comfortable with discussing your mental health with others? I'm not. I have a ton of anxiety, and always think the person I'm speaking too thinks I'm a idiot.

Give me some advice, please. And I'm sorry for the rambling post.

[ManOfConstantSorrow]

Speaking to a professional would be the best idea. Perhaps there are low cost options?

As for confiding to your partner, what do you hope for?

Hi A Hobbit,

Let's begin with what you do know. You do know that keeping your feelings to yourself isn't helping, correct? If professional help is not an option, have you ever heard of the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI)? It's the largest mental health advocacy organization in the United States. NAMI has free support groups seemingly everywhere. You'll be able to talk to other people who have depression in a safe, supportive environment. You can check them out online at NAMI: National Alliance on Mental Illness | NAMI: The National Alliance on Mental Illness

I think you should look into NAMI before talking to your friend's son because you've probably been struggling with depression for two or three decades.

If NAMI is not an option then I'd say you should talk to the son, but I'd go real slow instead of pouring out all of your feelings at once.

Keep us posted.

[A Hobbit]

I'm sorry. I wasn't very clear. I meant talking to my partner to let him understand what I am going through. Since he has an older son with mental health issues he would better understand - more then the average bear - why I do what I do.

I'm the primary creative force in our group. And when I'm going I'm really going, creatively and performance-wise.

Right now I am the opposite. That is why I was considering confiding in him.

I was diagnosed with BP and anxiety disorder years ago, but I've managed to keep the depression from getting the better of me up until recently. Right now I can't do what I need to creatively speaking.

[ManOfConstantSorrow]

Then perhaps it would be a good idea to have that discussion. Presumably he can see you are not in top form. He might appreciate your being open. You know your partner best of course.

I don't advertise the fact I am mentally ill (BP) but I am not afraid of sharing it. I am very honest about it and thus far it has been positive - no one has turned their back on me and ocassionally people admit they have their own struggles. I think people respect my honesty.

[ClearInsight]

I absolutely understand the worry with disclosing your mental health status. It is important to know that in recent years, 80% of people with a mental status change did not seek treatment. You seem to be aware of the stigma associated with seeking treatment. This stigma may very well be due to a lack of education on mental health in the general population. However, the negative stigma associated with mental health seems to be improving. Insurance companies are beginning to require plans to contain mental health coverage. Since you are below the poverty line, you can still seek help. Furthermore, I understand your worry about anxiety. Anxiety is a normal part of life, considering that anxiety is a vague or persistent worry. However, if you feel that your anxiety is interfering with daily life, then you may have a anxiety disorder. To say that this makes someone crazy or insane is simply part of the negative stigma, and there is absolutely no shame in seeking help.