Sort of a trivial question.....

I am a member of a yahoo group that has about 300+ members. The thing is, every time I post something, there is this one member who ALWAYS posts a reply simply to piss me off. She continuously berrates my opinions and she alone is making this place a very unpleasant place to post which is really sad because before she joined, the board was a lot of fun.
I have told her that she doesn't have to be rude or malicious in her comments but she seems to get pleasure from doing it.
How do I remain a member of the site but keep a distance from her if she in bent on making my posting life hell??

Trivial, I know but I really like the group. ~sigh~

thanks
T

Gee angel... it isn't so trivial... all we have are the words to read and we create our own environment beyond there... is there an "ignore" option on that board? If so, you could just do that and never see the posts, etc. Of course, you can prevent yourself from reading that person's posts... hard, but worth it!

Does the webmaster care? Can you notify someone to ask them to back off some? (DocJohn does that to us sometimes, ah hem I mean FOR us here...lol)

Don't feed it. Don't EVER respond to their post. NEVER EVER give the pleasure of knowing if you are reading them or not. They thrive on the response. . . some really pitiful people can run for a while on no response (making things up in their minds?) but after a while they will move on to someone who they have feedback from... esp if it's negative.

AND you can kill them with kindness... like here we have a kudo forum... so you could somewhere like that and just give them hugs out of the blue? (And don't return to see if they liked it, they won't! LOL)

Once in a while we have a problem person here... they either change or move on to another site (hey! maybe that's the board they go to???) Maybe they are used to the negative feedback like on some ISP sponsored sites?

Not trivial! I've been back on the internet for about two weeks and couldn't wait to find a good forum. I wasn't having any luck and finally went into a yahoo chat that was supposed to be support for sexual abuse survivors. It took awhile to find someone to talk to and then when I did we were discussing ways that she gets herself to feel "frisky". Long story short we ended up talking about female things and this guy sends a message that 'shouldn't we discuss in private'. i was like, uh, this is a support chat. that's the kind of stuff we want to talk about etc. he finally backed off, got mad and left the room. it wasn't that serious, but i was so dissapointed that the only chatroom i found didn't have much discussing. luckily i've stayed in touch with the girl i was talking to and she's been extremely helpful. then i found this place.

i think what it boils down to is that you're searching for something supportive, and the forum on yahoo used to be until this chic started causing problems. I agree with sky, don't feed her fire. you don't need to be submitted to abuse in a support forum. see if they have an ignore option or mods like sky said. If it keeps bugging you, it may be time to leave that forum. only do what's good for you! that's the important part. =)

I am so sorry that you are having this problem. Have you reported it to the leader of the group? I am sure that if this person is a problem then they have caused problems to others and maybe somewhere complained?
I have to agree that responding is a bad idea. Responding will only get this person to talk more and cause more problems.
If you have found that no group mods can help then maybe you might have to consider moving to a new group. Your own mental goodness is most important in sharing in these environments.

Jessica

I like your reply Sky ... LOL

Tina, I have been in a similar situation on another board. I don't think it is trivial either, it can be very irritating and upsetting, especially if you like all the other posters, as I did.

Like Sky said, NEVER reply to her "pathetic" posts to you. Just ignore her and she will eventually get bored. She is also shooting herself in the foot as far as the other posters on the board are concerned... if they have any intelligence

Take care,
Fuzzy

I agree, Not Trivial. All the wise advice already here. Good luck with that.

thanks all. It seems that her obnoxious behavior is only directed at my posts. I've only seen her nasty to one other person. It's an archaeology group and I can't imagine why she'd want to be part of it if she's just looking for fights. Makes no sense. I have sent emails to the moderator but i think he doesn't even look at it anymore. maybe it's time to find another group. sigh
thanks again for the replies.
Hugs all around
T

Hi again -- Last night, one of the local news programs was going to address the issues of "Internet bullies." I didn't watch the program, but it seemed relevant to your problem. Apparently, you are not the only one to experience this.

I must agree with that, Fuzzy, one has to learn to ignore those kind (learned by my own experience) I realize how very difficult it may be, but by not replying to their antagonism, pisses them off often, try to resist, this person is wanting you to pissed, and that isn't good for your friends to see and allows this bully to have their sick thrill.
Try to hang tough against this bullying, obviously this bully has some sort of mental issues and needs help.
Good luck,

DE