Defending Self, Defending others..

((perna)) ((keb))
Its funny I have always thought of them being safe here.
So hard to explain. One side of the street is safe the other is not.
Really does not make sense at all.
Why I would even think they were safe walking the street here after I had the thing with the guys trying to take my car is beyond me?
That was up on the corner of my street.
Your right about TV . It shows way too much. They have become to harmful.
Your right I see kids in town who have no adults around them. THey are lost........... so sad.
Also drugs are everywhere.
PPl should never be judged on thier looks either I agree. If you looked at my son. Your eye brows would go up and go oh my?
AS i have said hes no angel..........But He is a good kid and I do love that child so very very much.
I do not think I have ever hit anyone in my life. I have never my kids as I was hit as a child. THats why he was so shocked......
But as i said he does know now to defend himself. But he must becareful as there is a fine line with that.
With this whole thing I have never felt so helpless...............

Keb I am so sorry you have had to experence ppl breaking in.
to have teh 2 teens that live next door were responsible for it must have scared you. Please know your not alone either...

muffy

I know schools prohibit cell phones but they can be very helpful and with prepaid phones also fairly reasonable.

Can't believe I'm actually suggesting this. However with busy working parents and kids involved in extra after school activities it's a great way to keep in touch.

And 911 is just a cell phone away.

I actually used my cell about a month ago to report an accident. I was stuck in traffic and going the opposite direction so couldn't stop and help. But I could dial 911.

Keb
I got him one years ago
both my kids have them
I make them keep them on at school
that is the one thing i did right
I can message them threw the comp if i need too
When i hear the schools have gone into lock down I have done that
Boy isn't that sad to say.....a school going into lock down

You did right by reporting accident
muffy

(((muffy & Everyone))))

you have done and still are doing the right thing muffy... you are taking care of self, son, neighbors now.. if we dont report, then someone will be not s good again, it might be a neighbor next time.. if it happened to thier son i know you would want it reported... its how we protect each other...... ty for being you...

I took a judo course..... 2 years. But if you are not in a good shape you can`t deal with bullies, criminals, etc.

You need to be STRONG...

He has worked for almost 2 years. He is strong. But has a broken ankel. So he was at a disadvatage.
I was the weak one I thought
it would never happen..
what was i thinking??????

you probably were trying to create a life without violence and bullying? wish you'd been successful and that things like that werent real... you had and have good hope for us all... thanks for believing in the goodness of the human heart.. that matters too..

((((muffy))))

that was a criminal act perpetrated on your son.

it is horrible what happened.

it makes me re-think things.

a good self-defense class is good for us all, at any age, if we can take them.

this way we can overome some fears, especially those of us who have experienced an attack of some kind.

when your son is well, because he already is strong, he'll pick something to train in and maybe you will go too! (;

i know i will when i'm better because i think this can happen to anyone.

i want my daughter to take a class too.

thank you for sharing your sad event with us because many will turn it into something positive.

the best to you and your son - and thank you

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

I take a self-defense/martial arts class several times a week. The biggest thing I have learned is just how difficult it is to defend yourself. If you are caught off-guard or by multiple attackers, it can become nearly impossible to fight back unless you have trained for it.

Being victimized can shatter one's assumptions about the safety, security, and predictability of the world. I found that training in self-defense has slowly returned these to me to a small degree. I don't ever want to use these techniques, but I hope I could if I had to.

(((((nowheretorun ))))))))))))(((((((((((nightbird))))))))))))))))))))))((skeksi))

I think I had alittle bit of blinders on.....
I know from the past there is not good out there..
I was just hoping ppl would see the light...
or hoping my kids would not see what i have seen..
Now they both need to learn to self protect.
As there is violence and bullying out there. How sad how true....
But I still Believe in my heart there are so many good ppl out there.

This one bully will not take my spirit.....................................
nor my sons, nor my daughters,
I will not allow it.....
He will not have that power.
Other wise the bad guy wins...
love and peace to all of you

muffy

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love and peace to all of you

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((muffy)))) strength and kindness to you...

((((((nowheretorun))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
ty
"strength and kindness to you... "
may we all have it
with my all my heart i wish that
muffy

I felt I had to post in this thread... perhaps.. it is the OCD... this feeling of "having to" or perhaps I feel so strongly about this subject.

I have no fear.... because I have already had the worse.. of the worse happen to me...I know.. how things feel when I am hurt.. and.. it doesn't scare me...I go numb...

And.. I know in a fight for my life.. or for my own... I would show no mercy.... because my brain would turn to "survival mode"... and thought processes... no longer happen...at that point.

Muffy... you did nothing wrong... and your tender mom heart is hurting.. and I am so sorry..

When my son was in 6th grade... in the gym.... with a teacher watching.. a boy.. kicked my son in his privates.. and I was called.. and.. I had to take him to hospital.... yes.. so great the pain.. so great.. the damage...

This was a "safe" place... with a "safe" person watching.. school said "boys will be boys"...

I at that point.. taught my son to fight... yes.. a Mom.. teaching her son.. how to fight.. how to.. fight hard...and yes.. thru the years there were black eyes.. and other things from fights.. and I don't regret it... my city.. it is what it is..and when he became an adult I worried.. because he is powerful.. and can do a great deal of damage..

But I also taught him a "moral" code... never start a fight.. if you can talk your way out of it.. do... and if you can leave do it.. and I know he follows that... yet.. there are fights...so in my viewpoint... he needs this skill of fighting..

My point.. is.. that the "world" in my viewpoint... is not going to change..... I am for peace... but do not feel.. I will see it in my lifetime.....

Being... prepared... for me... that is the key.....

((((muffy and muffy's son))))

Free, I too was taught to fight because i was being picked on. Taught to end them. I never started one. and eventually that teaching rebounded on those that taught me because the biggest threat was always closest to me.

I believe in peace and I want peace. I admire Gandhi for his stands against violence. And... i know that if attacked, i'll fight for what i have to - instincts do take over.

(freewill))))))))
so sorry that happened to you. Plus what happened to your son
Its sad when adults are right there watching
In a school no less.....
What are ppl thinking?
good greeff

((Kiya)))))))))))))))))))))))))
I am sorry you were picked on too
Its hard so very hard..

you said
"I admire Gandhi for his stands against violence. And... i know that if attacked, i'll fight for what i have to - instincts do take over. "

I have always admired Gandhi to no end..................
He was great in my eyes
If we all could just calm ourselfs long enough to look at what he stood for maybe peace could come to more of the world.....

I have to say there was a issue with my son the other night. Took me totally by suprise. He had been nasty during the day so I thought all was connected. There I go for assuming....

I talked to him last night to great length. Late...I guess he has taken alot of teasing in town for not fighting back. Hes a well built young man. So no one understood why he did not fight back ((his friends))
un known to me he has had to a few times since.... ((fight back))There goes that thought i knew what was going on?
Any ways theres a post I made about him. The reason he reacted he did when i reacted in front of him. Was totall recall of whats been going on with him. I would say alittle ((PTSD) and big over reaction.
Its very sad the society brings this into our homes unwanted.
I at least now understand the other night. Hes not off the hook for it.
And so now we work on it.

Gandhi, peace and love and Understanding why some ppl react ...
With all my heart I wish for peace and everyone to see how if we respected each other...... life could be so good.
sorry I kinda went off topic here
Still agree we need to learn to defend...
ANd bullying has a real effect on the world.
muffy

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50guy said:
Well, I am a natural defender of women, children and those that cannot defend themselves. I grew up on the tough streets of Philadelphia, Pa., Kensington area. I was bullied a lot as a kid but, then I started lifting weights and exersizing like a fanatic. I still do to this day. I am a avid biker, hiker and exersize maniac.

When I was 14 years old I decided to avenge myself. I became a terror in the neighborhood and feared by many.
The only thing that saved me from seriously hurting someone was I joined the Marines.

Having been homeless twice in my life I can attest to those homeless guys telling you about the mean streets.

Did I ever tell you that Ican't stand bullies...even to this day.

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thank you Guy

nowheretorun;

You're welcome. While I don't seek out violence, I do not run from it either. I will try to defuse a potentially violent situation, but I do not back down if it comes my way. I won't let my kindness be taken for weakness.

Have a wonderful day,

Eric

youre talking about that moment of contact that comes after someone has been, or is about to be harmed... maintaning calm composure is so important at that moment...

i think about what little i know about police work... the escalation/de-escalation curve...

An awesome thread nowhere! This topic makes me feel so hopeless. I cannot fathom why some people think that it’s acceptable to victimize others. Don’t take this the wrong way, I am in no way promoting child abuse, but until these bullies are afraid of the consequences at home, they’ll continue to do what they want.

Hey, this is getting to be to be common, I agree with AAAAA.

It starts at home or ends at home. Bullies are created either by home life or by opportunity.

nowhere, I know about Police work, I come from Police family, me my son, my nephew, my brother and my cousin, all Police or former Police. We were taught to meet violence with just enough escalation to halt it. Just a bit higher to stay in control. What you said is spot on.

Good luck and have a wonderful day.
Eric

if its ok Guy i'd like to take this time to thank you, your family, and your colleagues for services rendered and received

50 - I've decided you can't be my husband, we don't agree that much

thank you also AAAAA, ive learned a lot from many of your posts also

AAAAA,
OK, then I will be your friend. Friends can disagree without being disagreeable, ok?

Eric

I have to say I do not think it always starts at home
Some kids are taught on the street....................
that song "teach your children well"
sometimes you can and they do not hear always
or they hear whats on the streets
Or they are bullyed some a t school some at home some on the street, some either turn into bullys or turn kind and fight for peace
just my thoughts
So sad
muffy