Coping with change... (or rather, NOT coping)

Didn't know which forum to put this in, so it's settled here.

I don't know how to put this or explain, but I really... I mean REALLY struggle with change. I used to just struggle ( I don't think anyone really likes change and a lot of people can find it hard), but I seem to have complete meltdowns when things change... I don't know how to teach myself to cope (even a bit better)? It's getting really disrupting.... and upsetting.
Anyone any ideas?
Thanks,
Molly

(((((((((((((( silver_moon )))))))))))))))))

I don't cope well with change at all, my only advice that might help is when a change comes, figure out if you really have any control over the situation and let go of things that you cant change.

What kind of change, hon? Are you ok to change your room around? Are you ok if plans change? What about if you are given a new assignment, like with your dolphins; would you have a hard time with that? Who Moved My Cheese is a good book about dealing with change.

Pretty much everything. This decorating my bedroom is really hard (not just because of J) I just don't like that it's changing... even though I don't like how it is. I don't know how to explain. We haven't started it yet either, yesterday my mum stripped one of the walls whilst I was with the littlies and I don't like it, my heads all over the place and I got panicky.

About plans changing... that's a BIG one. Like yesterday I planned to go help out with the littlies and then go to my local with K. K phoned me when I came out of the school saying her sister had invited us to go see a band and could we do that instead... I started panicking, felt so sick... locked myself in car.... and that's a 'change' that I can 'control'. I can decide.
If it's something that change and I have to do it it's a lot, lot worse.

But then there are little things too... like if I'm meant to be eating at a certain time or whatever... if something happens that changes that... really anxious!

I'm really anxious just thinking of all this.



oh... and thanks for the advice on the book... Ill go check it out.

Hi silver_moon
I am guessing that you have most of your daily life planned out ahead of time and that if something simple or major happens that would put your world in a spin ?
Have you tried to leave a section of your plans open to change? Pencil in a time for change then if it doesn't happen you can cancel the meeting . I hope you get where this is going. It has taken me along time to accept things change although I wasn't OCD or anything mind you I was called a few choice names over the years Having to let go of things and being flexible with others is all part of growing up /older and there is diddly we can do about it. But back to you , Just try and leave a little flexibility in life just a little and be prepared for it and you can always repaint/paper your room.
((silver_moon))