new here, not sure where i belong

hello,
i'v bounced around the forums a bit wondering where i really belong. and i'm still not sure. so forgive if i'm still at the 'wrong' place.
my 22 yr old son suffers from PTSD and possibly DID. my hubby and i have 4 other teens. to say that our family is in crisis is an understatement. blended family, of coarse. the 22 yr old is mine, along with a 17 yr old daughter. both suffer from PTSD. (my ex was AWFUL, i was abused as well......he was the minister of our church, to make it even more 'soap opera' like ) anyhoo, long story short, i'm here because of the anger and rage displayed by my son. it has literally driven the rest of us to the edge.

he uses SI to deal with it. yes, he is in therapy and on meds. (which we need to change as it is obviously NOT working) bless his hart.

a bit more background, i am in remissn for 2 yrs from NonHodgkins Lymphoma that had affected my brain. (i am LOVING the spell checker on this, truth! ) the battle lasted 5 yrs, so i'm sure that did nothing to help his fears. we were not sure i would survive.

he has an online support group and therapist. he talks to a couple friends online and on the phone. but thats it. yesterday is the 1st time he has been out of the house on his own in several months. my mother came to visit for a week from illinois and he went out with us because he had to and he did ok, except for 2 major blowups. ugh! but ok other than that. he has completely isolated himself from his friends. dropped out of college. has taken a med. leave of absense from his job, because he attacked 2 people. and ended up in the psych ward for a few days due to the SI cuts being way too bad recently.

i'm exhausted due to the screaming and blaming he does. and i just really need help. truth.

is this the right place to be?

thanks in advance.....
sara

just to add to this.....

i'm afraid this sounds terribly awful of me, as a mom. and it is really not like that in this home. when we first got married, yes there were alot of adjustment difficulties with all the kids. thats to be expected, right? for about a year. and yes, there was alot of favoritism shown by my husband, who has since stopped and attempted to make things right.

i guess what i'm trying unsuccesfully to convey is this.....we really do try to meet each of these young people in our home on their individual 'playing field' and give them the things they each need. and its tuff! ya know? its a loving, happy home. we laff and celebrate silly things in eachother's lives. and each child has their own baggage too. each one needs help coping.

and my hubby and i are just being stretched thin, i guess.

and my son is so vry strong, with the problems he has had to deal with in his life. he has been stretched beyond belief! truth!

just lookin for some support and help, from other parents who might be 'in the same boat'.

thanks for listening......

sara

Hi sara... I just wanted you to know that you have been heard. I wish I could help you but all I can do is offer a sympathetic ear.

My 22 year old son suffers from parental alienation syndrome because his father took him away from me when he was 10 and tried everything he could to make that boy hate his mother.

He was 18 when I found him in jail , not caring about anything or anyone.. especially himself and his life...he and I have come a long way in our relationship but he has a HUGE amount of baggage to carry.. his father has always been an alcoholic and he became a crackhead after he ran off with my son so the kid saw way more than what he should have living a life such as that.

Its amazing how resilient kids can be... even though your son is suffering right now.. you say he is strong.. he has already survived something horrible... he can find his way to healing.. and with a loving, supportive mom he stands even that much more of a chance to overcome it all...

I wil keep you both .. your family as well, in my prayers.. as I DO believe in the power of prayer.Peace....

Hi and welcome. I too am DID and you can find my experience with having it and the therapy and research about this disorder. It may help give you an idea of the things your son is going through if ( I say if because you said "possibly" ) he is DID.

Hang in there.

Thank you soooooo much for both replies, truth. i think this is what i need most of all, just to talk WITH other people. i have my son in therpy, truth. but, frankly with 5 kids depending on us, the money is stretched. lol so therapy for the family or just me is out of the question. SO here i am.

faith, i so appreciate(wow i REALLY love this spell checker! i can never do this on my own! you should see my posts before i use this thing! embarrassing is the word! lol) you telling me what happened to your son. goodness! what an ordeal! geez-la-weez. bless both your hearts. thank goodness you have him back. TRUTH. and yes, it does give me hope.

myself, thank you also. truth. i said 'if' he has DID because 1 dr said it. but i'm not sure. there are so very many forms of it and it could be it, i guess. i'm just afraid. sometimes he rages out. but this is very recent. the SI has happened for quite awhile. but i'll go to the DID forum and check things out. i'm just worried about posting there.....what if i trigger somebody??


we have to go to Mich. this saturday..to visit my hubby's family. a big deal. all of us, in a van for 5 hours, then visiting with everybody for several days. i'm terrified.

prayers, hugs, support and positive vibes are all welcome.

thanks TONS. i'm glad i found this board.

hi, myself....
i just read alot of the DID stuff........wow. i am stunned. i found several books that my son already has on your list. that is good. the description that petunia wrote to another describing it is my son straight on.

right now i am swirling in emotions, and need to stop the world a bit so i can get off.

thanks so much, TRUTH.
sara

my late husband had ptsd big time. maybe have his dr try tegretol for the mood. it stablizes it really well. it slows or even sometimes stops the blowups!

LOL your welcome and don't feel bad about wanting the world to stop DID is sometimes hard to understand.

By the way most of my DID information is in my blog not on the message boards because some of it can be over welming for those that are not ready for it. I have my entries indexed so that you only have to read one entry at a time in the blog.

To get to my blog click on blogs at the top of the page.
On the next page if its not a grey page you are in Doc Johns Blog. To get to the members blogs from their click on get your own that is on the left side of the page.

If its a grey page you are already in the members blogs and if you click on the entry under the words - Me, Myself and I that will bring you to my blog. Click on the letter head and the page that comes up on the right you will see the words - pages. in that list you will find - blog index. click on that then just click on the entry you want to read.

Yes there are may types of Dissociative Disorders.

There is only one kind of DID but a person with DID can be amnesiac or co - conscious. meaning either the person has no memory of what they do when experiencing the memories or they do.

The degree of amneia or co consciousness the person has depends on where they fall on the dissociative disorders scale

Also the type of dissociative disorder they have depends on where they fall on the dissociative disorders scale.

hang in there The message board called Dissociative Disorders is for ALL kinds of dissociative disorders - dissociative fugue, depersonalization and so on not just or limited to just DID. which is probably whyt you were getting overwhelmed.

just take your time and read what you can and pass on what you can't. there is no rules here saying you have to read everything or read everything all at once.

but in a good way, i gess. lol if ya CAN be. 1st, myself, i wana THANK YOU for all the info. truth, itts taken me a LOOOOONNNNG time to sift. and a cupl of glasses of rum too. ok? sometimes this is too much. rmembr, i have 3/4ths of a brain left, aftr the cancer. (gallows humr is the ONLY way, truth)

we just got back from a famly trip to Mich. and all in all, it went pretty well. so THATS good.

there are sevral things on my son's burner heer at home that we NEED to deal with NOW.
forgive me for not spellchecking tonite. i'm just too exhosted. i'll do bettr next ttime, i promis!

for now, i'm gona read.

thanks agen, myself......i am slowly lerning........and i'm not sure if i'm more or less afrad.....

sara

You belong here! Wlcome home to PC!

((((((( sara ))))))))

I hope you are settling in ok here...