being a burden.. *might trigger?*

i dont know if this is the right place for this..

i know what its like to worry about someone alot. care about them and the rest of it..

but, when you're the one being cared for..i feel like such a burden. more than a burden. besides not being able to open up, if i ever do talk to someone about any problems, i feel intense guilt immediately afterwards. i hate thinking that people are worried or whatever. and the stupid and backward thing is that-I DONT believe anyone is worried. i honestly dont believe that anyone gives a %#@&#!. the moment i see that they might, i push away because i DONT WANT TO BE A BURDEN.

i mean, i just spoke to someone on msn. STUPID! i said to much. waaaay too much. things i never wanted to say. ESPECIALLY to this person who has their own problems. i immediately joked about it and changed the subject.

i hesistate so much to post anything here. i think ive complained..once(?) on support chat here. i felt horrible immediately and now i ony go there to bury my own problems and help others.

i just wanted to know..sorry i dont know if this is an innapropriate question..do you ever think that the person you're caring for feels like a burden? or can anyone relate to me?

sorry again if innapropriate..

(((Gabriel)))

I first wonna say you are NOT a burden...we love you much Gab =). I know what it feels like to have guilt after expressing myself....at times....I have lost friends over my depression...but you won't at PC.....you won't loose me...or ANYONE!!!!!! Gab your a great friend to me have you got my PM's? Please respond I'll listen....I need you as much as you need me =).....

Dustin

((((gabe))))) no, you're not a burden. i know this feeling of guilt. you're not alone. you're always welcome here. to post and chat, of course. we're here to listen. you have friends here.

(((GABRIEL))). I am very sorry for your situation in feeling that you are burdening others with your issues. I sincerly feel that God made it available for people to have their needs met so that there is no need to feel that you or anyone else is burdening another person. That is why sites like Psych Central are so important expecially to people that feel that they are a burden to others because evreyone can relate to each other and their disorders so you dont have to feel like a burden to anyone and you can just share and learn how to cope from others eperiences. You are more than welcome in chat at anytime when you need someone to talk to about your issues. Take care. Soidhonia

I can relate to the hesitancy to "burden" others with our problems. For years I thought it was primarily because I didn't like the idea of being a complainer or requiring another to feel obligated to listen to my problems when he or she may in fact be overwhelmed with his or her own life problems. I believed I was acting out of a sense of selflessness and consideration. But as I grow older I think it was more about not feeling worthy. Feeling as though my mental health issues were not warranted, that others had it much worse. Who was I to complain?

If your sense of self worth has been damaged or destroyed you probably aren't going to feel that your problems matter, because you don't matter (or at least that's your belief).

But what if your burden is a financial one? I am 42 yrs old and unemployed, having lost my long term job back in 2009. I exhausted my unemployment benefits and still have not been able to secure work. I live with a roommate who has assumed the financial burden of paying my share of the bills for over a year now. I am incredibly grateful to him ( I don't believe there are many out there who would do the same). But Being dependent on someone who is not a family member or a significant other is difficult (It's hard enough when it is a family member or spouse).

You lose all sense of dignity, and as the months wear on, all sense of hope that the situation will change. How does one reconcile that? Any advice, ideas etc would be sincerely appreciated.

I know my partner feels like a burden, and god yes its horrible for her to say anything or admit she isnt okay, if i guess she just wants to shut it down so fast before she realises that i know
She very much believes that a 'problem shared is two people depressed'

But i can respect it, and understand it because I love her
You shouldn't worry, there is a reason we stick by those who are suffering - we care
If you were a burden or too much then we wouldn't still be here

Hope your okay
Your carer understands, trust me x