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#1
May 12, 2009, 10:42 PM
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Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up!   (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture  )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#2
May 13, 2009, 01:30 AM
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ok now -dont worry - old wounds being opened - had tears running down my face - dont think it counts as crying though - still couldnt let go even though it hurt - ok now - never mind.
 and to all who need them 
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#3
May 13, 2009, 02:41 AM
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oh darling... you're so strong, but it's ok for us to support you even now your walls are up again. do you want to talk at all about what just happened? (((((lots and lots of love)))))) |
 phoenix7
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#4
May 13, 2009, 03:10 AM
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thanks Deli,
somthing just made me feel isolated and alone- like the kid thats left out when everyone else is playing - fed back to my childhood I think and how i felt about myself then and I guess now .....and ping! tears running down my face .... not really crying though - still not quite human lol  just feeling like I dont belong anywhere - a ship without anchor drifting.... no home port... no crew - no direction - prob just more about losing T and so being easier to trigger.....
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet Last edited by phoenix7; May 13, 2009 at 03:58 AM. |
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#5
May 13, 2009, 03:36 AM
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((((P7))))
i know that feeling well. but remind yourself that you are loved and accepted here, and you're like - the ring leader of the play group!!! honestly, i don't know any else who is more inclusive, and tries to cheer people up, more than you do, P7. so stick with us, kiddo. we'll stay by you also .
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| phoenix7
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#6
May 13, 2009, 04:40 AM
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Quote:
 with Deli!You definitely belong here ((((((((((((((P7)))))))))))))))))))))) I'm sorry you were triggered.  Are you feeling any better?
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| phoenix7
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#7
May 13, 2009, 05:32 AM
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Tears in my eyes
sadness in my heart stupid little trigger tearing me apart .....  sad sad sad sad sad sad sad ...........................................................
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#8
May 13, 2009, 06:20 AM
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(((((((((((((((((((P7)))))))))))))))))))))))))
Deli is right!!!!! We love you. You belong and you matter, a lot.
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| phoenix7
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#9
May 13, 2009, 07:20 AM
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Pheonix, Yes I know that feeling, its as if the world around us is incapable of offering any comfort EVER!
__________________
Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished. If you're alive, it isn't. ~Richard Bach |
| phoenix7
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#10
May 13, 2009, 08:16 AM
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im sorry you know that feeling mouse -
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#11
May 13, 2009, 09:49 AM
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Quote:
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#12
May 13, 2009, 10:02 AM
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This little trigger holds the real feelings that you had as a child. A little grieving in order here? As the others have said, you are very special to us so there are other truths going on here as well! You are very wise to tie this in to losing T recently. These are your feelings, can you make friends with them?
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
| phoenix7
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#13
May 13, 2009, 10:14 AM
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 First off FEEL BETTER DARN IT! ~hugs~ with the others. You have made ME feel welcomed and included here and I appreciate it more then you know. You sure do seem like the ring leader! Here if you want to vent, can wipe away those ~non~tears  or if you need someone blown up...I know a guy.... Think about how far you have come! You have good friends that CARE!
__________________
 ~Bearchic34~Loving wife of TheLionKingLives (LK) & mother of 4 amazing children and 1 that flies with the Angels "Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart." |
| Catherine2, phoenix7
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#14
May 13, 2009, 10:16 AM
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((((safe hug))))) I'm sorry you were triggered. And yes, tears running down your face without any sobbing does constitute crying... some aspect of yourself was definitely crying.
I'm glad you are figuring it out...If you aren't sure what has caused the triggering... try and keep track as soon as you can after being triggered and make note (maybe even write it down?) of what music was playing, what you were thinking, where you were, even what you were wearing etc... the more detail the more you can find your triggers. Once you find them, you can avoid them as much as possible until you work on them. Breathe.
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| phoenix7
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#15
May 13, 2009, 10:31 AM
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P7 -
__________________
 notz |
| phoenix7
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#16
May 13, 2009, 10:34 AM
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You lovely PC people - thankyou
im just sad now - its ok ... - thankyou - off to be 1.30am here - night all - be safe ( no blowing anyone up ok- but thanks )
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#17
May 13, 2009, 10:38 AM
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Yes, it is okay to be sad! Night, night again my dearest Phoenix!
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
| phoenix7
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#18
May 13, 2009, 12:10 PM
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Nights are always the hardest IMO, why do those monsters come out once the lights go out? Why does the dark no matter where you are bring back the fear & pain, the memories? It sucks!
__________________
~Bearchic34~Loving wife of TheLionKingLives (LK) & mother of 4 amazing children and 1 that flies with the Angels "Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart." |
| phoenix7
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#19
May 13, 2009, 02:05 PM
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P7....
 I hear you, and I understand!! You are very sweet and very supportive, and all of your emotions are relevant. You give so much to people here!! Let PC be your home, and we'll be your anchor!! That way when you need a place to dock and take a rest, you've got one!! We can help you sail your ship too!! AHOY!!!!
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| phoenix7
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#20
May 13, 2009, 02:47 PM
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hope you had some good sleep phoenix, & things look better!...
ive not been around that long, but i know already this place wouldnt be the same without you, your very special sweetheart, kind, warm, thoughful, giving, honest & true. You mean alot to alot of people here, never forget that, we will always be here for you.....
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| phoenix7
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#21
May 13, 2009, 08:10 PM
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 the sadness just seems overwhelming at the moment.....
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#22
May 14, 2009, 09:33 AM
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You are probably letting out years of sadness? Allow yourself to grieve and it will pass. Keep up your self care and don't forget to reach out and receive support.........
__________________
Don't let your problems or the world make you feel small. Stretch your arms out over your head. Take a deep breathe. Tell yourself that you are big. You are big, not small. You always have space, you are not trapped........ I'm an ISFJ |
| phoenix7
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#23
May 14, 2009, 03:13 PM
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~bear hugs~ P7
__________________
~Bearchic34~Loving wife of TheLionKingLives (LK) & mother of 4 amazing children and 1 that flies with the Angels "Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart." |
| phoenix7
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#24
May 15, 2009, 03:14 AM
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I'm having moments when I dont know what ive done....
someone hands me somthing and i do somthing with it .... then I dont know what happened - what i did with it .... I'm blank ...this has happened a lot today - even some of the patients noticed... I'm afraid.... don't know what this is... anyone? go to do somthing and forget what i was doign where i was going.....
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#25
May 15, 2009, 01:07 PM
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It's stress induced I'm pretty sure. It's a form of dissociation at the least, since you ARE doing something not just zoning out and standing there dazed. Be gentle with yourself. Try to limit your exposure to things that trigger you, or demand more of you. You might confide in a friendly co-worker that "if" you seem a bit foggy for them to ask you how you are or to say something (this will help you ground yourself.) And do go over the ways to ground yourself when feeling this way. I'm pretty sure there's a sticky post on them.
__________________
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| phoenix7
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