PTSD?

I haven't been on the boards lately... but I'm having problems coping with the fallout of my divorce. I can't sleep well again, I'm always anxious, feeling angry, and crying again for no reason. Been having nightmares of being abandoned... and then I wake up and think why... I AM alone.

The period before my divorce was really hard on me. My ex pulled a suicide stunt. Left me a note to ask me to tell the woman he was was special. HIs grandmother died and he fought with me all during the furneral over a watch he lost, that she gave him just DAYS after we separated. He blamed me for a broken water pump on our house when I asked him to help with it... that turned into a nightmare of an argument when he refused to leave his girlfriend to help me out.

I feel like I don't know what to do right now. I'm feeling so down and so unable to trust anyone again. I will take a few steps forward and start feeling better... not great, not better... but at least positive that I'm getting over this. And then... BAM! It hits me again.

I always wondered if you could have PTSD after severe dysfunctional relationship problems? I don't mean anything violent like a murder, but I keep remembering all of the awful things my ex said and did to me now.

Also... what are good tips to deal with this during the holidays? I know I'll be alone most likely on Christmas... and I'm really beginning to feel lonely for what I used to have. The family, the marriage, the home... my life has changed so drastically over a short few years.

Been there and got the medals. It's tough!
Last year 4 days after leaving an Acute Mental hospital I couldn't face a family christmas and spent it peacfully and safetly on my own. My family checked up on me incase I had done nothing silly. But apart from that I just took things easy and gave myself time for me. Did what I wanted for me which wasn't much but I wasn't interested in all the 'Christmas Joy'.

What ever works for you try even now in the run up.

Take pampering candlelit baths. Snuggle up to weey films, Make an Easy Meal Chill

Love
Lilac
I cant use the chat room although my profile is posted but anyone can write to me in England (I'm Scottish/French) and I feel isolated here as there are less support groups
lilacwine68@yahoo.co.uk

Lilac, thanks for the reply. I don't get to these boards often unfortunately.

Medals? They give medals out for surviving this crap? Sheez... I'd be happier with a normal life than an award medal LOL.

I just don't want to be alone this holiday. I really miss my marriage and family life. But my ex turned into a total a--hole.

Blech. Just wish there was a pill we could take and make it all go away!